A bunch of bankers. Screenplay

JANE

What was that shouting about?

SEAN

Just had to turn down a loan application from one of the great unwashed.

Jane hands him some more papers.

JANE

Your day probably won’t be getting any easier. Your 10.30 appointment is outside. And it's Terry.

Sean groans and looks up at the ceiling.

SEAN (V.O.)

I actually had a soft spot for Terry. His Mum died twenty odd years back leaving poor Terry alone in the world, with pots of cash, and a big house near the golf course. Unfortunately Trevor's IQ is smaller than his waistband. And Terry is one skinny bloke.

INT. WAITING AREA (OUTSIDE INTERVIEW ROOM) – NEXT

Thin old man, sat patiently waiting for his appointment. TERRY. Wearing battered old raincoat, Sherlock Holmes deerstalker hat. Trainers with holes in. Big shopping bag on his lap. Looks like a human version of the alien from E.T.

SEAN (V.O.)

Afraid he would blow the lot on extra strong mints and comics, Mother left the money in a trust giving him a decent allowance every week. Sadly what was a decent allowance twenty years ago now won’t even buy Terry his comic books. The poor sod is destitute but because on paper he's rich, the social services can’t help him. And the bank is bound by the terms of the trust. Catch 22.

CUT TO:

INT. INTERVIEW ROOM – SEAN AND TERRY

Sean greets Terry. Offering him a chair.

Terry takes his Sherlock Holmes hat of his head and with complete idiot smile says

TERRY

I am Terry. Where's Sam.

SEAN

Yes I know Terry. Don't you remember me? I saw you a couple of months when the toilet bowl fell on your head. Me and Sam came round and fixed it for you. Remember?

FLASHBACK. INT. SAME INTERVIEW ROOM – THREE MONTHS EARLIER

Terry sat in chair wearing trademark raincoat and deerstalker hat. The hat is fastened tightly to his head by a thick bandage under his chin.

Sean trying not to giggle.

SEAN

Morning Terry. What's wrong with your head?

TREVOR

I went to the loo, pulled the chain and whole toilet fell on my head.

Sean struggling not to laugh. Sad but funny.

SEAN

Just a minute, mate. I'll go get Sam.

INT. INTERVIEW ROOM (BACK TO PRESENT)

Sean can smell something bad in the room.

SEAN

Sam's very busy this morning. What can I help you with my friend?

Terry puts the shopping bag down on the desk between them.

TERRY

It’s my dog Blackie.

SEAN

So what's wrong with Blackie then?

TERRY

He's got the shits. I don't have any money to take him to the vet.

SEAN

So where is Blackie now?

TERRY

Blackie is in my shopping bag so he don't make a mess in the bank.

Terry opens the bag and a little black head pops out. Sean leans forward, gets a smell from the bag and leans back as far as possible.

SEAN

Think it’s a bit late to worry about that now. Just a minute. I'll go get Sam.