Shock Waves

They obviously weren’t talking about the Benz or she’d be moving it.

I’m standing here, looking like a black dot in the middle of the sand. The anti-beach babe. The kind of woman he’d ask to move her car, but nothing more.

With a sinking feeling, Ellie turned and started heading back to the beach house. It was for the best. She needed to see how Candy and Matt were doing. Catch the story about Sara and this mystery male. Follow up with Tish, make sure the espresso machine wasn’t getting the better of her. What had she said it sounded like? Keee-keee klunk?

Funny, that’s exactly how Ellie felt at the moment. As though something inside her had jarred loose and was rattling around. And she knew what that something was. A piece of her past named Bill. And here she was, walking away for a second time from him, just as she had that long-ago summer night when she was twelve.

Seventeen years and hundreds of life changes later, walking away today felt every bit as hard.

THREE HOURS, two Bomb Pops and one Candy-Sara-Ellie girl-talk fest later, Ellie stood in the cosmetics aisle at Walgreens with Sara, perusing the hair color section.

“I can’t believe I agreed to be made over into a beach babe,” muttered Ellie, looking at the boxes of color with names like Bombshell Blond, Golden Sunset and Strawberry Vanilla.

Sara, switching their plastic shopping basket from one hand to the other, snorted a laugh. “Gotta look like one if you want to wow them at the audition tomorrow morning. Plus, if—no, when—you get hired, think of all those points Team Java Mammas will get toward the grand prize!”

Team Java Mammas. The team name she, Candy and Sara had given themselves in their quest to win the festival grand prize, a free beach bungalow rental every summer for the next ten years. “Just wish I could wow them with black spiky hair,” Ellie muttered.

“I’ll pretend I didn’t hear that.” Sara scanned the boxes, all decorated with smiling models sporting luxurious, shiny hair in more shades than a color wheel.

For a surreal moment, everything looked too light, too blond, too perfect. Too anti-Ellie. What was she doing here? Not just here at the store, but here at the beach, too! She wasn’t some sixteen-year-old starring in Beach Blanket Babettes—she was a businesswoman turning thirty in a few months! She shouldn’t be here. She should be back at Dark Gothic Roast, getting ready for the big move.

“I don’t know, Sara—” she gestured toward the sea of models’ faces “—I’ll never look like them.”

“Hon, even they don’t look like that. They’ve been airbrushed and streamlined and photo-enhanced down to their very roots.”

It wasn’t the words as much as the lilt in her pal’s voice that shook Ellie out of her funk. She looked at Sara more closely, realizing her telltale lines of stress had all but disappeared. As corny as it sounded, she even had a twinkle in her eye.

And Ellie knew why. She’d just forgotten why’s name.

“What was that surfer hunk’s name?”

“Drew.” The way Sara said his name, it sounded like a piece of delectable candy. “And yours…”

Mine. Oh, man, that was so far from the truth.

“Bill.” Ellie heaved a small sigh. Crazy how just saying his name sent small shivers all over her. And to think she’d just told herself she wasn’t some goofy sixteen-year-old. Truth was, saying his name turned her insides all gooey, like some besotted, crushed-out teenager.

“How long were you two neighbors?”

“Years. I remember first seeing him when I was six, the year my dad left. Bill was twelve, and already a stud-in-the-making.”

“You had a crush on him at six?”

Ellie nodded slowly. “Crazy, huh? I still remember the first time I saw him. He was standing on his porch, staring out at nothing, lost in thought. I thought he looked like a fairy-tale prince. After that, my heart did a sonic boom every time I saw him, right up to the day he moved to New York to go to film school.”

“How old were you when he moved?”

“Twelve.”

“You must have been so sad.”

“Sad? That was the year the movie When Harry Met Sally came out. I saw it at least ten times. I’d sit in the back, drowning my sorrow in popcorn, fantasizing about Bill and how, despite our tumultuous parting, we were destined to be together.” She pointed at the box Sara was holding. “Honey blond, no way.”

“But, El—”

“Too Reese Witherspoon. I need a bad-girl blond color.”

“No, I meant…” Sara hesitated, then set the box back on the shelf. “I was still feeling sad about your childhood heartache.”

Ellie didn’t want to admit some of that sadness had come back today. She couldn’t blame Bill for not recognizing her, but something about his lack of attention had made her feel again like that brokenhearted twelve-year-old.

“So,” said Sara, “what’s a bad-girl blond? The color of Madonna’s hair?”

Ellie felt relieved to be back on topic. “She’s not so bad anymore, is she?”

“Cameron Diaz?”

“Maybe.”

“Jennifer Aniston?”

Elle gave her friend a look. “Girlfriend, you need to unchain yourself more often from that laptop because obviously you have no idea what bad is.”

They laughed.

“El,” Sara said, turning serious, “I know you’re not the type to easily talk about what’s on your heart, but I have to add one thing. Maybe it wasn’t a coincidence that you saw Bill today. I bet you’re going to run into him again.”

See Bill again? Ellie didn’t know if her heart, mind or soul could handle it. What had happened this morning was enough to haunt her for months as it was. But no way did she want Sara to know that. Ellie Rockwell was so much better than some ancient crushed-out angst.

She hoped.

“As much as I’ve always wanted to have a real supernatural experience,” she said in her best breezy voice, “I doubt you’ve suddenly turned clairvoyant.”

Before Sara could follow up with something else serious and heartfelt, Ellie pointed toward the end of the aisle. “Hey, down there are some awesome black hair colors.”

Sara made a stopping gesture. “You promised to go blond, and I’m holding you to it. This one—” she grabbed a hair color labeled Lightning Blond “—is perfect. After we wash out your black rinse, this color will give you that Gwen Stefani bad-girl blond you want.”

“Okay, we’re starting to talk bad.”

Grinning, Sara picked up a second container. “Then we’ll add some gold highlights, which will give you that sunny, sparkling beach babe look.”

Ellie looked over at a couple of sunny, sparkling beachettes. The type who’d snagged Bill’s attention today. Here she thought she’d so smoothly avoided further discussion of Bill, but she’d forgotten the nonstop banter in her own head.

One of the beachettes laughed, reminding her of the bimbo Bill had chortled with earlier today. What did those types have that Ellie didn’t? Hell, if she could make herself over into the Mistress of the Dark, she could certainly make herself into a Gidget type, too. Not the sunny, sparkling variety, but definitely a Gidget on the Edge.

“Bad-girl with gold streaks it is,” she said, turning back to Sara. “Sold.”

“That’s my girl! Hey, El, this is fun taking care of you for a change. Oh, look at these yummy pastel lipsticks…”