The Darkness Within: A heart-pounding thriller that will leave you reeling

‘Don’t worry. Come as soon as you can. We’re all looking forward to seeing you.’

‘Thank you,’ Eloise said a little stiffly. ‘Goodbye.’

‘Goodbye, love.’

Elizabeth slowly set down her phone on the table in front of her, not sure what to make of their conversation. Eloise hadn’t sounded herself, she’d seemed distant and restrained, as if she was hiding something. One of the characteristics Elizabeth had always liked about Eloise was her bubbly personality. She had a zest and enthusiasm for life which Jacob had had too before he’d fallen ill. It took a lot to get Eloise down. Perhaps she and Jacob had had an argument. Maybe about her leaving early? He was so insensitive and tetchy at present that if the poor girl had said she wasn’t feeling well and wanted to go home, he could easily have thrown a strop. Elizabeth could picture it only too clearly and if that was the case then he needed to apologize. She and Andrew were having to make allowances for him continuously and think carefully before they spoke.

Elizabeth thought hard; another possibility for Eloise’s mother was that she’d just found out Eloise was pregnant. But no, she dismissed that straightaway. Jacob had been in hospital for the last month and before that he’d have been too weak. She assumed they were having a physical relationship, as young people did nowadays before marriage, but because of his illness he hadn’t been well enough. Yet something was bothering Eloise.

Elizabeth ruminated on it for the next half-hour and when she called Jacob down for lunch she said, ‘I’m not prying, love, but is everything all right between you and Eloise?’

‘Yes of course,’ he said, immediately on the defensive. ‘Why do you ask?’

‘I phoned her a little while ago to see how she was and she didn’t seem like her usual self.’

‘I told you, she’s ill,’ he said, irritated.

‘She was back at work. She said she was on lunch duty when I called.’

‘So?’ he demanded.

‘I’m just concerned, that’s all. She’s a sensitive girl, and all of this can’t have been easy for her.’

‘And it’s easy for me?’ he shot back.

‘No, love. Of course not.’ She knew she wasn’t handling this right, but it was so difficult to talk to him at present. Perhaps she shouldn’t have said anything at all. ‘I’m just concerned for you both.’

‘Well, don’t be!’ he snapped. His face was set as he glared at her. ‘What goes on between Eloise and me has nothing to do with you or Dad. You both need to keep the fuck out of my life. Understood?’ Grabbing his plate of food from the table, he stormed upstairs.

‘Jacob?’ she called after him. But his bedroom door slammed shut and then there was silence.

Elizabeth remained where she was, her mouth dry and her pulse beating wildly, shocked to the core by what had just happened and at a loss to know what to do. It wasn’t the first time he’d sworn since coming home but she’d never felt threatened by him before. The way his face had contorted with anger. The look in his eyes as he glared at her, the tone in his voice; she had seen and felt pure hatred in her son! The aftercare notes from the hospital had said transplant patients could become frustrated by their long recovery but this was more than frustration. Much more. She and Andrew couldn’t do anything right and the way he treated them suggested he loathed and detested them. But why? Then she caught herself. Of course he didn’t detest them. He was recovering from a major life-changing operation, and it didn’t get more serious than a heart transplant. He was also having to take a vast array of pills which, though necessary, all came with possible side effects. With small relief Elizabeth acknowledged that it was quite likely his medication was responsible for his mood swings and aggression. She’d check the list. If it was the medication then presumably something could be done about it. The surgeon had mentioned that if the side effects of any of his drugs became too unpleasant then they could try him on another brand.

Mitsy ventured out from under the table and Elizabeth stroked her head. ‘We’re just going to have to be patient,’ she told her. ‘It’s bound to take time.’ The dog looked up questioningly. Since Jacob had returned from hospital he’d hardly had anything to do with her; she’d stopped vying for his attention, and now kept out of his way. ‘It’s bound to take time,’ Elizabeth repeated, as much for her own benefit as the dog’s.

‘No Eloise?’ Andrew asked when he returned from visiting a parishioner on Friday evening.

‘Apparently not,’ Jacob said sarcastically, glancing at her empty chair at the table.

Elizabeth saw her husband take a breath. She knew he was about to reprimand Jacob and quickly stepped in. ‘She’s coming tomorrow morning,’ she said. ‘Your dinner’s ready.’

Andrew nodded and went upstairs to wash and change before eating, avoiding looking at his son. He’d been later than he expected so Elizabeth and Jacob had started dinner without him. When he returned Elizabeth pinged his plated meal in the microwave. Jacob gobbled down the last of his food and, as his father sat down, left to go to his room.

‘What have I done now?’ Andrew sighed. ‘I’ve just come in.’

‘You haven’t done anything,’ Elizabeth said, setting his plate in front of him. ‘You know how he is at present.’

‘I’m not sure I do any longer.’

She joined him at the table but didn’t resume eating until he’d said grace. ‘How was Mr Tilney?’ she asked. Andrew picked up his knife and fork.

‘Comfortable. His family are with him.’ He paused. ‘You’re definitely going to ask about adjusting Jacob’s medication at his next appointment?’

‘Yes. Monday,’ Elizabeth confirmed. She smiled encouragingly, although she’d checked the list of possible side effects and the most serious had been the increased risk of infection from the immunosuppressants. Nausea, vomiting and hair loss were mentioned, but nothing about mood swings or sudden anger.

‘So how was your day?’ Andrew asked.

‘Good. The church is ready for tomorrow. It’s looking lovely. Let’s hope the weather stays fine.’

She and a band of volunteers had spent the afternoon thoroughly polishing and dusting the church, arranging the flowers, and making sure everything was ready for the wedding that was due to take place the following morning. The wedding was causing considerable excitement in the village as the couple getting married were minor celebrities, having appeared in a long-running television soap. They weren’t locals but had chosen Maybury church for its charm and olde-worldliness, and Andrew was taking the service. It was rumoured that camera crews might be present, and the press certainly would. Most of the village would be turning out to watch.

‘Once Eloise arrives the three of us will walk over,’ Elizabeth said brightly. ‘It’ll be lovely to watch a full white wedding after everything that’s been going on. And it might give Jacob and Eloise some ideas.’ Andrew nodded and smiled, for they’d both assumed that when their son did marry, it would be in Andrew’s church. The image of Jacob completely recovered, in a new suit bought specially for his wedding, and waiting at the altar for his bride, brought a lightness to Elizabeth’s thoughts that hadn’t been there for a long while.

Jacob remained in his room for the rest of the evening, as he had been doing most evenings since returning from hospital. Aware he needed to take regular rests as part of his recovery, Elizabeth and Andrew didn’t disturb him. But at nine o’clock Elizabeth went into the kitchen where she kept his medication and transferred the pills he needed from the Dosette box into the little plastic cup as she did at regular intervals throughout the day. She poured a glass of water and carried that and the pills upstairs. She knocked on Jacob’s door and waited for his, ‘Come in,’ before entering. He was sprawled on his bed, the laptop that he now spent so much time on open on his lap.

‘How are you, love?’ she asked. Going over to him, she carefully set the glass and pills on his bedside cabinet. He grunted an acknowledgement, his gaze staying on the screen. She turned and as she did she caught sight of what he was watching. ‘Jacob!’ she said, horrified.

‘What, Mum?’ he asked, meeting her gaze confrontationally, and making no attempt to hide the screen or lower the lid. ‘Is there a problem?’

Hot, flustered, and unsure of what to say, Elizabeth backed away. ‘That’s not nice,’ she said, shocked.

He laughed unkindly. ‘Well, you don’t have to watch it, do you?’

She hurried from his room to her own, where she sat down shakily on her bed. She’d wait until she was calmer before going down to Andrew. She wouldn’t tell him, he didn’t need more upset. But what had shaken her more than actually catching Jacob watching porn was his blatant disregard for her. He hadn’t been embarrassed or ashamed. It was as though he didn’t care or have any respect for her any more, which wasn’t like the Jacob she knew, not at all.

Chapter Twelve (#ulink_e95f63c8-d802-5404-9cfc-d6f20f8b51cb)

Jacob sat in the passenger seat next to his mother as she drove, his gaze fixed rigidly ahead and earbuds in so he didn’t have to look at or talk to her. Elizabeth was grateful she didn’t have to make conversation or try to smooth over the last confrontation with her son, for her thoughts were full of what she would say to the doctor, diplomatically, so that Jacob didn’t become upset and angry again. Their disagreement this morning had been over his wish to drive them and he was clearly still in a bad mood. True, it was only a few days until the six-week post-operation milestone – when he could drive again – but Elizabeth had erred on the side of caution and had wanted to check with the doctor first that it was all right. Jacob had exploded into anger, swearing at her and kicking a chair. Thankfully Andrew had already left the house so hadn’t witnessed this last scene.

The bad atmosphere had been building over the weekend, Elizabeth admitted as what had promised to be a pleasant few days had quickly deteriorated into one angry scene after another. When Eloise had arrived on Saturday morning she’d received a frosty, offhand reception from Jacob. Then without giving a reason he’d refused to go to watch the wedding. Andrew was already at the church so she and Eloise had gone together, but Eloise had been very quiet and seemed to take little pleasure in the ceremony, presumably worrying about Jacob. When they’d returned to the rectory, Elizabeth had left them alone in the living room, believing they could do with some time together to repair their differences while she busied herself making lunch. Half an hour later Eloise had come to find her, looking as though she might have been crying, and said she was going now as her mother wasn’t well.

‘Oh dear, I am sorry. I expect she’s got what you had,’ Elizabeth sympathized, while suspecting it might be an excuse. But what could she say? She’d asked where Jacob was and Eloise had said he’d gone up to his room for a rest. Eloise couldn’t be persuaded to stay for lunch so Elizabeth had seen her off at the door, sending her mother, whom she had yet to meet, her best wishes for a speedy recovery.

Once she’d gone Jacob had appeared and taken his lunch up to his room, which had irritated Andrew who’d just come in and had expected them all to eat together.

Then on Sunday morning Andrew had made the mistake of saying that now Jacob was quite a bit better it would be nice if he started going to church again. Elizabeth and Jacob usually went together and if Eloise was staying with them for the weekend she came too. Elizabeth had been in the adjacent room when Andrew had broached the subject with Jacob and had heard every word of their heated exchange. It had culminated in Jacob shouting, ‘He’s your God, not mine! Stuff your religion. I never believed. I hate your fucking church.’ Which simply wasn’t true. For even if Jacob hadn’t had the strength of faith his father had, he’d never minded going to church before. And as the Reverend’s son there was a certain expectation – duty, even – for him to go, although Elizabeth would be the first to admit that duty was no longer a word in Jacob’s vocabulary.

‘It’ll be better once he can get out more,’ Elizabeth had said placatingly to Andrew after Jacob had stormed off. He was clearly badly shaken.

Andrew had nodded half-heartedly, not wholly convinced. ‘Just make sure you talk to the doctor about his medication. Something has to change.’

Jacob had spent the rest of the day in his room, only coming down to eat and take his pills, which Elizabeth no longer took up to him, but set out in the kitchen, calling up to her son when it was time.

She glanced at Jacob now as she parked in the hospital car park. Expressionless and unfazed by the bad atmosphere, he was head down, selecting music on his phone. He stayed in the car while she bought a ticket from the machine and placed it in the windscreen. Then with his earbuds still in and without acknowledging her at all, he got out and fell into step beside her as they walked to the main entrance. It wasn’t until they were in the department that he took out his earbuds, but then of course it wasn’t to talk to her, but to the nurses, some of whom were young and attractive. She saw him turn on the charm and thought of Eloise. Jacob had never overtly flirted with the nurses before.

The routine was similar and they’d attended so many of these check-ups that they knew what to expect. As usual it took nearly an hour to run all the tests, monitor his heart rate and weigh him, before they were called in to see the doctor.

Dr Shah, one of the implant team who they’d seen before, sat behind his desk going through the latest test results. He glanced up and greeted them as they entered, then continued reading as they took the two chairs opposite. Jacob strummed his fingers on his knee and fiddled with the wire of his earbuds, now looped around his neck. He began tapping his foot impatiently as Elizabeth sat perfectly still, her thoughts racing with what she had to say.