One Minute Mentoring: How to find and work with a mentor - and why you’ll benefit from being one

“What do these voices say?”

“They keep saying, ‘Haven’t you worked hard enough, Diane?’ Everyone seems to be convinced that I should let my career take a backseat for once. I particularly get that message every time I forward people another beautiful picture of the twins.”

Warren paused before replying. “What I hear you saying is that right now you have a lack of passion in your career, you’re feeling overwhelmed, and you have the nagging sense that maybe it’s time to put this whole work world behind you once and for all and hang up the big retirement sign on your door.”

“That’s about it. What do you think?”

She expected support from Warren, but his reply immediately put her on the defensive.

“I think you need more balance in your life. Right now, you’re giving too much of you to your business. You need to share yourself with people outside of work.”

“But I already do!” she answered, a little too quickly and a lot too loudly. “I donate to charity, I volunteer on holidays at the food bank, and I do my best to be available to friends and family—”

“Maybe I didn’t make it clear. You don’t need more items on your to-do list. You need to share who you are with others. Have you ever thought about being a mentor?”

“Warren! I need energy and focus, not another distraction.”

“Here’s the thing,” Warren said. “If you find someone you genuinely want to mentor, that relationship will give you the energy you need.”

“But who would I mentor?”

“How about a young person in sales? That will remind you why you got into the work in the first place—and show you how far you’ve come. And mentoring a young person will help you focus on your own next steps.”

“Where would I find this person?”

“Just keep your eyes and ears open. Once you set your intention to be a mentor, you’ll be amazed at the people who show up.”

Mentoring another person will help you focus on your own next steps.

“Now that I think of it, over the years people have approached me about helping them. I’ve always turned them down, because I was too busy. And I’m still worried that I won’t have time to do this well.”

“Don’t worry. Many people avoid mentoring because they think it takes a lot of time. It doesn’t have to. Some of the best advice I ever received came from tidbits during casual conversations with my mentors.”

Mentoring? Me? Diane still wasn’t so sure. But it wasn’t the first time she hadn’t agreed with Warren right away. Over the years, she’d learned to take a breath before responding to big ideas—especially from Warren.

“All right. It scares me, but I’ll try it. As long as I can count on you to walk me through it.”

Many people avoid mentoring because they think it takes a lot of time. It doesn’t have to.

“That’s the spirit,” Warren said. “Okay, I’ve got another call, so I have to run. But I’ll see you soon. Don’t you have a birthday coming up?”

“Yeah, but I haven’t had time to plan a party.”

“Well, if you have a party and I’m invited, I’d better not see any retirement signs up anywhere. At least not until you try mentoring someone first.”

“It wouldn’t be a party without you, Warren. And it won’t be a retirement party—yet. Thanks for the pep talk.”

ONE MINUTE INSIGHTS

Pause, Reflect, and Learn

Have you avoided becoming a mentor because you think it takes too much time?

Being a mentor—while it does require regular communication—isn’t a full-time job.

Most people are energized by their mentoring relationships; you likely will be as well.

By setting the intention to find a mentee, you’ll become more open to potential mentoring partnerships all around you.

The Search (#ulink_9dad76bd-f238-5c2b-b566-ca482007f820)

When Josh got home to his apartment that night, Dev was tinkering with a computer on the dining room table.

“Replacing the hard drive,” Dev explained.

As Dev worked, Josh told him about the conversation he had with his parents and brother about finding a mentor.

“My boss suggested I ask Eric, the young guy who shares my cubicle, to be my mentor. I don’t mind learning stuff from him, but I’d love to find an older person with more extensive experience as a mentor. Someone who could help me figure out if sales is even the right career for me. Any suggestions?”

Dev took a moment to think. “Most of my contacts are tech geeks our age, so I don’t think they’d be much help. But I do have an uncle who’s been in sales for years. He’s quite successful. Want me to introduce you?”

“Sounds like a good start,” said Josh.

*

Two days later Josh was sitting in a restaurant with Dev’s uncle, Ron, a sharply dressed man in his fifties. Ron certainly looked to be the picture of success.

“Dev tells me you’re trying to decide if sales is right for you. Let me be the first one to tell you—if you want to make money, stick with sales! It’s the only job where the sky’s the limit. The rest of these jobs, they give you a salary and then you’ve got to beg at the end of the year for a bonus. Beg! My salary is under my control. It just depends on how hard I want to work and the number of sales I want to make. Period.”

“I was hoping that would be the case with me,” said Josh, “but I’m finding it easier said than done.”

Ron pointed a finger in Josh’s face. “Tenacity is what you need! It doesn’t always come easy, so you gotta stick with it and put in the hours. What’s getting in the way of you putting all your time and energy into your job? Are you living and breathing sales?”

“Well, I do have a life outside of work. I spend time being a Big Brother to a kid named Ricky. I also like to stay in shape, so I go hiking or play basketball with Dev and our friends on the weekends. It’s good to keep balance in my life, right?”

“Forget balance! You’ve got to remember: sales is where the action is. The company depends on you. Once you’re making big money then