The Re-Enlisted Groom

“We have all night. And in a few days, we’ll have a lifetime.”

Her eyes clouded, and she gripped him back. “No. We won’t. Don’t you see? You’ll be gone. We don’t know when you’re coming back!” A pause, a whimper of despair and then, “Maybe we should not rush and wait.”

In a heartbeat, he dropped her onto her back, covering her body with his. “I can’t,” he said, then filled her in one long, hard thrust. “I can’t. I need you too much.” He withdrew, then surged, again and again, wild and frantic, his mouth crushing hers, each touch, each stroke driving away her misgivings about their future and leaving only the untamed passion they’d shared for over a year.

He was unrelenting, his reality in the here and now and not days away. Not years away. But he felt her slipping from him. He knew he was reckless sometimes, knew he took chances any sane man would shudder at, but even when he felt the hot rush of fear that came with the risk and danger, he always knew Maxie would be here for him. He wanted to make it permanent. He had to. He couldn’t lose her, not even a fraction, refusing to believe their lives would change.

He kept making wild love to her, and when she trembled with her explosion, drenching him with her desire, he made love to her again, listening to her cries of passion and ignoring the words he was too terrified to hear.

Maxie sat on the edge of the bed in the cheap hotel room, her hands clenched on her lap. She toyed with her engagement ring until her finger was raw and red, then yanked it off and shoved it into her purse. Tears rained down her cheeks, splashing onto her fists. She didn’t bother to wipe them away. She needed them. She deserved them.

She glanced at the clock, the big hand refusing to move past the time of her wedding. Her gaze shifted to her gown, white satin and hand-embroidered lace tossed carelessly in the chair. Once today she’d put it on, if only for a moment to feel like a bride, and she’d almost weakened in her decision. That dress symbolized all she wanted—husband, home, kids. All she wanted. Kyle wanted only her. And danger.

Was marriage, right now—before he had to leave for Desert Storm—the wisest move for them? Or was it just fear pushing them to rush their wedding, their lives? Was she in love with the idea of marriage and family, or with Kyle? She tore her gaze from the gown. She’d asked herself the same questions over and over for the past hour, the urge to race to the chapel and marry Kyle staggering her.

Turmoil and fear held her back, kept her rooted to a lumpy bed in the darkened room. How could she do this to the man she loved? But she knew. Weeks of chaotic thoughts, of preparations for a wedding and for the groom to go to war, of Kyle refusing to discuss postponing their wedding, had brought her to this moment. This horrible, telling moment when she should be walking down the aisle on her father’s arm. She squeezed her eyes shut and covered her face with her hands, a deep sorrow tormenting her to the breaking point.

She’d felt it while he was away for desert training six weeks ago. That first-time separation had opened her eyes, scared and confused her. For without the physical passion, she realized they were on the same road, traveling in opposite directions. She loved him deeply, yet they wanted different things, and for a while, she let herself believe she could change him, change his wants to hers. He was thrills and chills, wanting only her and the corps in his life. She wanted a home and fat babies—and stability. The only thing they wanted mutually was each other.

Maxie knew blood-jolting desire wasn’t enough.

And it was the sole reason she couldn’t face him right now.

One look, one touch and she would never do what she had to do. His stare bore too much power, his kisses too much steam, and he knew how to make her forget. Their passion was always so strong, she had trouble seeing beyond it. Until now.

They were afraid and seeking some control in a hopeless situation. He was leaving and wouldn’t believe it was best to wait until he came back, that if they really loved, time would be on their side. Marriage in a panic was reckless, and getting unmarried would be much harder.

No, she thought, nothing could be harder than this. Yet she was willing to risk everything not to make a huge mistake.

Maxie glanced at the clock again and groaned, listlessly crawling onto the bed and curling into a tight ball. She tried not to imagine her groom, what he was thinking, the hurt he was feeling. If only he had listened...if only time wasn’t so short...if only there wasn’t a war waiting for him...

Clad in his dress blue uniform, Kyle Hayden’s spine was straight as a rifle stock, his eyes forward, his gaze on the chapel door. She’ll be here, he thought. Any minute. Around him, guests and attendants whispered, the tick of the church clock sounding like a gong in his head. His buddies were lined up alongside him, his older brother, Mitch, offering excuses: traffic, a flat or a woman’s incredible need to be late for every major function in her life. Yet the longer Kyle waited, the more he imagined her in an accident, bleeding somewhere where he couldn’t get to her. He’d already sent two of his pals off to search for her. If she was okay, she would have let him know, he thought. Maxie wouldn’t do this to him. Maxie wouldn’t make him wonder.

Maxie loved him.

He believed. And he waited.

Waited past the time of the ceremony.

Waited as their guests left, his humiliation hidden beneath the granite expression he’d perfected over the years. His eyes never leaving the door, Kyle let his hurt and anger escalate and even as his heart leaped when a figure slipped into the chapel, he cursed himself for forgiving her so easily in those few seconds. Until he saw her mother and the look on her face. The sympathy and pity Lacy Parrish sent him was enough to kill Kyle where he stood.

He dropped Maxie’s wilting bouquet and with his white barracks cover tucked under his arm, he left the church with the measured cadence of a marine going off to war. Which was exactly what he had to do. Married or not

Less than twenty-four hours later, dressed in desert beige camouflage utilities, Kyle stood in formation with his platoon, his body weighted down with his pack, bedroll, ammunition and weapons. He didn’t speak to anyone, too aware that his buddies knew he wasn’t the married man he’d hoped to be today. He tried not to imagine Maxie’s face, what she was thinking when she stood him up, what she was doing now. A woman’s sob caught him off guard, and his gaze snapped to a fellow marine, his wife in his arms as she cried and told him she would miss him. Kyle’s throat tightened, the pain in his chest threatening his breathing. That should be me, he thought, tearing his gaze away to scan the crowd of women and children, parents and friends who’d come to see the marines off. He waited for long, dark auburn hair to catch his attention, waited to see her running toward him, begging for his forgiveness and telling him she loved him.

She’ll come, he thought. She won’t let me get on this plane without saying goodbye. Kyle believed and he waited, lagging behind when his platoon filed toward the plane. Still he stalled, back-stepping, searching the mass of people. She’ll come, he told himself. She might have wanted a wait to many him, but she loved him. She did.

A sharp command pierced his thoughts, and he faced his first sergeant.

“Move it, marine! The war won’t wait.”

Kyle obeyed, the last man aboard the aircraft. Yet even as the hydraulics lifted to seal the huge troop carrier, Kyle still hoped, still looked. But as the hatch closed him in with over a hundred other marines, Kyle faced the truth.

And inside, he died.

One

Grand Canyon, Arizona

Seven years later

Maxie paused, the shovel full of soiled hay halfway to the wheelbarrow when she heard the helicopter. The noise vibrated the walls of her barn, disturbing her animals as the pilot made a low-flying sweep of her place before setting down.

“Relax, Elvis,” she said to the horse tethered outside his stall. “You ought to be used to that by now.” She flung the putrid pile onto the heap, shaking her head. The independent pilots the park service hired when they were shorthanded in bad weather usually had Top Gun envy and were always a little showy. Apparently the pilot she was supposed to board for the next week or two wasn’t beyond hotdogging, either.

Since it was likely one of the pilots she’d boarded before, she didn’t immediately run out to greet him, estimating it would take him a few minutes to anchor the chopper and walk the hundred yards from the dirt helipad to the barn. If he thought to look for her there. Either way, she didn’t want company. Usually the service put the temps up in hotels or at Mrs. Tippin’s Bed and Breakfast, but with half the rescue teams out with the flu and the tourist traffic unusually high now for the lack of snow, the overflow boarded with her. The occasions were too rare for her to regret that part of the deal she’d made with the service three years ago. She just hoped this pilot didn’t expect her to wait on him. She had too much work to do.

After maneuvering the heavy wheelbarrow down the long corridor of stalls to the truck parked outside the rear entrance, she forced it up the ramp and quickly dumped its odious contents. Maxie hurriedly backtracked, bringing the wheelbarrow back for another load, then hefting the shovel.

Movement at the far end of the barn caught her attention.

She froze. The color drained from her face. Her gloved fingers tightened on the handle.

Rescue me. Oh, someone please take me away from here.

But Maxie Parrish knew no rescue would be coming.

Her worst nightmare was walking steadily toward her.

She would recognize him anywhere, anytime. Even with the fleece collar of his butternut suede jacket pulled up against the wind and his face shielded beneath a black cowboy hat, she knew him. By his stride, the shift of his shoulders... his sexy rocking hips.

Seven years’ worth of guilt and shame threatened to swallow her whole, and Maxie fought the overpowering urge to run.

Instead, like a sinner anticipating penance, she waited for the moment when he would recognize her.

A duffel slung over his shoulder, his gaze was more on where he was stepping than where he was heading. “This the Wind Dancer Ranch, ma’am?”

“Yes, Kyle. It is.”

He stopped short. His head jerked up, his gaze narrow and piercing her straight through to the bone.

He didn’t say a word. He just kept staring, whatever he was feeling locked tightly behind an expression harder than ice. His fingers flexed on the duffel strap at his shoulder. His lips tightened. And Maxie felt the hay-strewed floor soften beneath her feet as he moved within a yard of her. His gaze roamed, and she felt heat slowly sketch her face as he searched for changes and absorbed each one. It was hard to believe those eyes still held the same intensity, dark and wicked, making her skin warm in the chilly morning, making her body talk when she wanted it to be silent.

And unfortunately, after all this time, he knew it.

It didn’t help that he looked as good as he did when he was a marine, she thought. Oh, he was older, more mature and though there were a few lines around the corners of his eyes and a cynical tightness to his lips that hadn’t been there before, he was still essentially the same. Handsome, tanned, sable haired with pebble dark eyes that had always held a glint of mischief. They didn’t now, offering nothing. Apparently he didn’t think his surprise arrival was any kind of blessing, either.

Kyle was shaking inside. Seven years faded away, and he was a marine, standing on the flight deck, waiting for her, hurting like mad. He couldn’t stop the sensations, wishing to God he had never set foot inside the barn, but knew he had to get control, reminding himself that she was his past, not his present.