A Cowboy Christmas

The heel of his boot caught the edge of the step, sending him sprawling onto the porch. The cookie plate flew from his hand, bounced off the front door, then slid to a stop under the swing. Twister vaulted over Logan’s body and snarfed up the broken reindeer head.

“Oh, my God. Are you all right?” Cassidy rushed to his side.

Shrugging off her touch, he crawled to his feet. His shins stung and his chin hurt like hell where he’d banged it against the step. But the worst pain settled in his chest—a tight squeezing pressure that threatened to suffocate him.

“Please listen, Logan.”

His legs wouldn’t move—his traitorous feet had frozen in place.

“Bethany mentioned to me how badly you’d both wanted a child…” Cassidy ceased rambling and for a moment Logan believed he might catch his breath, then she continued and his lungs pinched closed again. “I know how devastated you were—” her voice dropped to a whisper “—that Bethany was carrying your baby when she died.”

Lack of oxygen numbed his brain and Cassidy’s words sounded garbled as if water had flooded his ears.

“I…” She paused, then rushed on. “Plan to keep the baby.”

Unable to trust himself to say anything appropriate, he remained stone-faced. After a tense stare-down, she spun on her boot heel and trotted to the hatchback. The car sped off, leaving a cloud of dust lingering in the air and Logan with a knot the size of Texas in his chest.

DON’T YOU DARE CRY.

Cassidy stopped the car at the entrance to the Bar T Ranch and rested her head against the steering wheel.

She’d put off telling Logan about the baby for three months because she didn’t want to say anything until the risky first trimester was over. She’d expected the cowboy to be shocked by the news, but not so…so cold. Even now the memory of his flat stare left her shaky.

Her eyes watered and this time a tear dribbled down her cheek.

Logan still mourned Bethany—the love of his life. The girl he’d dated all through high school and had married after graduation. Like clockwork Bethany had scheduled a haircut once a month when Cassidy opened her salon five years ago. Not long after, Bethany had confided in Cassidy about her miscarriages. They’d mourned each time the young woman had lost a baby and celebrated every time the home pregnancy test showed a plus sign.

What broke Cassidy’s heart was Bethany’s teary confession that all she’d ever wanted was to give Logan a child. Then when Bethany had finally succeeded in carrying a baby through the first trimester, she’d been killed in a car accident on the way to a doctor’s appointment in Midland.

No one, no matter how pure or goodhearted, avoided life’s cruel twists and turns.

A tiny part of Cassidy had hoped for a hint of excitement from Logan. After all, he’d wanted a baby for years. You’re such a fool. He wanted Bethany’s baby—not yours.

Well, she possessed enough enthusiasm for both of them. Cassidy would be twenty-eight in January and she had always wanted to marry and have a family. Her situation with Logan might not be ideal, but a baby was a blessing no matter how the child was conceived, and she was determined that Logan’s cool reaction wouldn’t dampen her joy.

Lifting her foot from the brake, she drove east toward the trailer park on the outskirts of Junket where she and her mother lived. She suspected Logan wished Mr. Claus was in the business of granting “do-overs.” If so, he’d probably ask jolly old St. Nick to erase that September night she’d strolled into the bar to let her hair down after a stressful day of caring for her mother.

Billie’s Roadhouse was known for its live bands and big dance floor. That particular evening Cassidy had been on the hunt for a cowboy to dance with into the wee hours of the morning.

Dance with—not have sex with.

When she’d spotted Logan drinking shots at the bar she’d gone over to say hello. The silly, drunken grin he’d flashed had put her dancing plans on the back burner. The bartender had held out Logan’s truck keys, assuming she’d arrived to haul his inebriated carcass home. She could have said no. She could have phoned Logan’s friend, Fletcher, to come get him.

But you didn’t.

Her and Logan’s fate had been sealed the moment she’d grasped the truck keys from the bartender. Afterward, she’d spent weeks making up excuses for her behavior that night.

Logan had been too drunk to drive.

Logan had needed to eat, and she’d insisted on cooking him a meal.

Logan needed to sober up, so she’d helped him shower.

Logan needed a babysitter—in case he’d vomited—so she’d rested on the bed with him.

Her intent had been to slip away before dawn, but then he’d called out Bethany’s name in his sleep and Cassidy had woken to his hand on her breast, his eyes shimmering with grief and pain. Logan had hit rock bottom and Cassidy hadn’t had the heart or willpower to turn him away.

Forcing the memories aside, she flipped on the blinker and entered the Shady Acres Trailer Park. She could count on one hand the number of shade trees throughout the twenty acre patch of flat Texas dirt. The owner of the property had invested little money in landscaping. Most of the park’s tenants struggled to make their rent payment and what extra money they earned went toward food and clothing, not flowers or bushes.

Years ago Cassidy’s mother had planted a cherry tree in the small yard alongside their trailer. Today the tree stood twenty-five feet high and in April its pink blossoms added a touch of beauty to the stark neighborhood. Best of all, the tree provided much needed shade for the aluminum shed Cassidy used as a hair studio.

At half-past one in the afternoon the kids were in school and the neighborhood was quiet. She slowed the car as it passed over the first of two speed bumps and noticed the Millers had strung Christmas lights on their trailer. Cassidy took great pride in being the first Shady Acres tenant to decorate for Christmas. She’d made a habit of hanging her lights over Thanksgiving weekend. But her mother’s temperament had been more difficult than usual this holiday and Cassidy hadn’t had the energy to dig through boxes of decorations. After she parked next to the single-wide and got out of the car, her neighbor greeted her.

“Hello, Cassidy.”

“Hi, Betty.”

Betty’s cousin, Alice, appeared. “Sonja’s been inside the whole time you were gone.”

“Mom’s frosting Christmas cookies. We’ll bring a dozen over later today.”

The little old ladies had claimed to be related when they’d moved into the park eight years ago, but no cousins Cassidy knew held hands like her neighbors. She didn’t care what kind of relationship the women had. After Cassidy’s mother had been officially diagnosed with Alzheimer’s two years ago, Betty and Alice had offered to keep an eye on Sonja when Cassidy ran errands. She owed her neighbors a debt of gratitude.

When Cassidy entered the trailer, she found her mother exactly where she’d left her—sitting at the card table in front of the TV. Pieces of broken cookie littered the tabletop and smears of colored frosting marred her mother’s blouse.

“Who’s that?” her mother called, gaze glued to the TV.

“It’s me, Mom.” She approached the table and inspected the cookies. “I like that one.” She pointed at the snowflake coated with an inch of silver-colored sugar crystals.

“I made that for you.” Her mother smiled.

“Mmm.” Cassidy took a bite and choked on the sweetness. When her mother’s attention drifted to her favorite game show, Cassidy went into the kitchen, tossed the rest of the cookie into the trash and checked the clock. She had fifteen minutes to prepare for Mrs. Wilson’s hair appointment. “I’ll be in the salon if you need me, Mom.”

Cassidy went outside to the shed, propping the doors open with potted plants. She’d saved her paychecks from a chain hair salon she’d worked at in Midland for two years to buy the aluminum building and beauty-shop equipment. Then she’d paid a fortune for a plumber to hook up a sink. She used extension cords and an outlet strip to plug in the hair dryers and curling irons and the two lamps she’d set on end tables. Between her mother’s social security checks and Cassidy’s income from styling hair they managed to make ends meet.

Her mother had been forced into early retirement because of health problems and so far Cassidy hadn’t had to touch a dime of her mother’s savings—money Sonja had set aside during the twenty-five years she’d worked at the fertilizer factory between Junket and Midland. Cassidy would use that money to put her mother in a home when the time arrived that she needed constant care.

Mrs. Wilson pulled up in her Lincoln Town Car. “Right on time, Mabel.” The retired schoolteacher was never late.

Mabel set her purse on the loveseat Cassidy had found in a secondhand store the previous summer. “How’s Sonja?”

“Mom’s doing well.” She refrained from discussing her mother’s worsening condition. If people learned how quickly Sonja’s disease was progressing they’d encourage Cassidy to put her in a home sooner rather than later.

“Go a little darker on the rinse, dear. I don’t want the color to fade before the Smith’s party on the eighteenth.”

After months of pleading with the older woman to experiment with a different hair color, Cassidy had given up. Mabel insisted on using old-fashioned blue hair rinse. Cassidy draped a cape across Mabel’s shoulders. “How’s Buford?” Her husband had retired from the state highway patrol this past summer.

“He’s being an ass.”