Her Knight Protector

‘You have no wife, sir?’

‘No.’ Bryne frowned. ‘There was a lady once…but she married another, richer man and I put all thoughts of marriage aside and determined to make my fortune. Yet I suppose I may marry one day, if only in the hope of a son to follow me.’

‘And Sir Alain…?’ Katherine asked and then blushed as his brows rose. ‘Forgive me. I ask too many questions.’

‘I believe he has not thought of marriage as yet, lady.’ Sir Bryne smiled at her and Katherine lowered her eyes. She must be more careful of her words or she would give herself away, and that would be embarrassing. ‘Though with such a man it is not always easy to know what is in his mind.’

Sir Alain seemed to have shrugged off his reflective mood and was now laughing and talking to Celestine, apparently enjoying the pleasure of her company. It was clear that he found her attractive, which was natural, for she was very beautiful. Feeling a tiny pang of disappointment, Katherine scolded herself for allowing the green-eyed monster of jealousy into her heart. She could not blame Sir Alain for finding Celestine fascinating. The older woman was both beautiful and charming…even if Katherine did suspect her of being false.

But perhaps she was letting her emotions blind her. She had no right or cause to be jealous. She must put aside these foolish ideas and thoughts that had begun to creep into her mind, plaguing her whenever she was unwary enough to let them.

Sir Alain had turned his head and was looking at her now. Katherine glanced quickly away, for she could not meet his gaze, which was concerned and thoughtful, but not the kind of look he bestowed on the lovely Celestine.

She knew he thought her a mere child, and perhaps she was compared to Celestine. Yet she felt like a woman, and her heart ached for the tenderness she was developing towards this man, foolish as it might be.

‘Our host was telling me of a shrine in his garden,’ Alain said now. ‘This villa was built on the site of others that had been here since the great days of Rome. There was once a temple to the goddess of love here, and a shrine still remains.’

‘How very pagan,’ Celestine said, ‘and rather exciting. I should love to see this shrine—would not you, Katherine?’

‘Yes, perhaps,’ answered Katherine a little uncertainly.

‘The time to see it is at night when the moon shines, for the goddess loved the moon,’ Marcus Aurelius told them. ‘If it pleases you, I shall show you now, for the moon hath come out from the shadows and will light our way. It is said that, if you please the goddess, your heart’s wish will come true.’

‘Oh, we must see this shrine,’ Celestine exclaimed. ‘Do say you want to see it, Katherine!’

‘Very well, if you wish it.’

Katherine rose reluctantly, but it was clear that Celestine was eager to see the shrine of the goddess of love. She was walking with her hand upon her host’s arm, teasing him with smiles and words as they walked just ahead of the others.

‘Are you offended by the thought of a pagan goddess?’ Alain asked Katherine. She gazed up at him for a moment, her eyes wide and serious, before shaking her head. ‘Then is it the Lady Celestine that offends you?’

‘Neither,’ Katherine replied. ‘I am a Christian by faith, sir, but my father was a great scholar, as I have told you, and we discussed other forms of religion. I dare say there is merit in many of them, but I would not put my faith in anything a pagan goddess might reveal to me.’

‘Would you not?’ Alain gave her a wicked smile, which made her catch her breath. Something inside her made her feel as if she would melt in his warmth. How handsome he was when he smiled like that! And how foolish she was to let it affect her this way. ‘Not even if you might gain knowledge of your heart’s desire?’

‘I have no desires, sir,’ Katherine replied with commendable dignity in the face of his provocation. Her heart was racing like the wind, but she would give him no indication of the confusion his teasing aroused in her. What was this strange feeling inside her—was it what they called desire? If so, she had no right to feel it for a man who had no such feelings towards her. ‘I am not like to find a lover nor yet a husband, for I have no fortune and my face is unremarkable.’

‘You are not a beauty,’ Alain said, looking at her seriously now. ‘But you have something about you, lady, that many would find attractive.’

Katherine laughed merrily. ‘You are kinder than my father, sir, for though he loved me dearly he never thought me other than plain. He told me that I was unlikely to wed without a large dowry and I have no thought of it.’

‘Are men such fools that they must have either a pretty face or a sack of gold?’ His brows rose, but the expression in his eyes puzzled her since she did not know what lay behind it.

‘I do not believe that all men are fools, sir. Indeed, I would not think either you or Sir Bryne a fool—but still I do not believe that I am likely to find many suitors…and perhaps no one I would care to accept. I would prefer to remain unwed rather than make an unhappy marriage.’

‘That is your choice, of course.’ He hesitated, his eyes making her heart thud in her breast as she felt something stir inside her—a feeling so sweet, like warm honey—and was almost breathless. ‘But what of love and the fulfilment of your destiny?’ His brows rose as he teased her and her foolish heart leaped. Why did she feel so light-headed—almost as if she could walk on air?

‘If I found love, that would be another matter,’ Katherine said and her smile lit up her face, though she managed to retain her appearance of cool dignity. ‘But I fear my destiny may be to remain unwed until I die.’

‘That would be a sad destiny for one of your nature,’ Alain said and the soft tone of his voice set her insides churning. She was hot with something that she suddenly knew for desire. This was how a woman felt about the man she loved, and Katherine could no longer deceive herself. She had for her folly fallen in love with Sir Alain de Banewulf!

She glanced aside, for she could not bear that her own expression should give her away. It was surely unmaidenly to have such desires. Besides, he had given no indication that he felt anything of the kind for her. He was kind and concerned for her welfare, but nothing more. To reveal her foolish passion would humiliate and shame her.

Fortunately for Katherine they had reached the shrine and, after some exclamations from Celestine, the small group fell silent. It was a beautiful spot in a small grove. The shrine was just a pile of stones that most would ignore, but it was surrounded by fragrant shrubs and vines that sheltered it from prying eyes, and there was a quietness about the place that touched the soul.

Katherine was very aware that this was a holy place. As a Christian she could not worship the deity that had been consecrated here, but she felt its power and its goodness. There was no evil here, just a benevolent kindness that seemed to reach out and envelop her—the feeling of love so strong that she found herself wishing for something so ridiculous and smiled to herself.

Foolish, foolish Katherine! Sir Alain would never love her as she loved him.

‘What must I do to please the goddess?’ Celestine asked of her companion and broke the feeling of reverence that had held them all until that moment. ‘Shall I give her my silver bangle?’

‘In ancient times women gave her gifts to learn the secrets she knew,’ Marcus Aurelius replied. ‘But I have been told that the gift must come from the heart—and a simple thing will find more favour than a rich jewel.’

‘Then I shall not give her my bangle,’ Celestine said. ‘For it is one of my most precious possessions. I shall think of something else and visit her another day—for I would not have you hear my demands of her.’ She gave him a mocking, inviting look.

Katherine turned away with a little shiver of disgust. It seemed that Celestine used her smiles indiscriminately on all men to get her way with them. She had seemed to entice Sir Alain with her inviting looks, but now she was more interested in their host.

Katherine noticed that Sir Alain was watching and frowning, and she felt her heart contract with pain for him. She was sorry if Celestine had hurt him, for he was a gentle and true knight and she did not want him to suffer a broken heart.

‘I shall take you back to the villa,’ he told her, turning his back on Celestine. ‘Come, lady, I would see you safe and the hour grows late. I shall not see you in the morning— I have some business I must attend before we leave Rome.’

Katherine made no reply, simply turning with him and allowing him to lead her back to her own room. He said good-night to her, made her a courtly bow and waited until she was inside the villa before turning away.

Would he return to the others—or would he prefer his own company? He seemed to spend much time in thought and she wondered what kind of a man he was inside. In truth she hardly knew him. Perhaps it had merely been the moonlight that had played such a trick on her? How could she love a man she did not know?

Smiling at her own impudence, she went to perch on a stool and sat dreaming as Maria came to free her hair of its covering and brush it so that it flowed over her shoulders in soft waves. Now, if she had but known it, with that look upon her face, a gentle smile curving her lips and her hair reflected in the moonlight, she was truly as attractive as Alain had told her. But she had no mirror to see her own reflection, nor would she have believed it had someone shown her. In her own mind she believed herself plain and nothing could change that long-held opinion.

The night was too beautiful to allow for sleep. Katherine was restless and rose from her bed, looking out at the moonlight. The scent of the wisteria that hung on the villa walls was strong and made her somehow wistful. Perhaps it was the full moon that kept her from sleeping—or was it something else?

There had been a sound… There it was again, the soft tinkle of a woman’s laughter. Celestine was in the garden. Now Katherine could hear the deeper laughter of a man. Two figures had come into view. They lingered for a moment in the moonlight, the man drawing the woman into his arms to kiss her.

Katherine watched as Celestine arched her head back, her manner that of surrender to his desire. It was an intimate moment and private. Withdrawing from her window, Katherine felt hot and ashamed of spying on the lovers.

She had not been able to see them clearly enough to know who the man was, but she suspected that it was their host. Celestine had been doing her best to tease him all evening. And now it seemed that they had an understanding of an intimate kind. Perhaps she would stay in Rome with him.

Feeling even more restless than before, Katherine returned to her bed and lay down. Seeing the lovers entwined in that passionate embrace had made her more aware of all that was missing in her life. Would she ever know that kind of intimacy? It was unlikely, for who would want to lie with her? She had thought that she could face a life without love, but that was before she had looked into a pair of blue eyes and seen a smile that made her heart beat faster.

She knew that once she had parted from Sir Alain her life would seem emptier than before—but there was nothing she could do but accept her fate. To sigh for the impossible would only bring her unhappiness.

‘Are you thinking of staying here for a while?’ Katherine asked Celestine as they walked in the villa gardens the next morning. ‘Our host has said that we are welcome and you have expressed doubts about returning to your dower lands.’

And she had seen that kiss in the garden the previous night!

‘It would suit me to live here as the wife of such a wealthy man,’ Celestine admitted. ‘But our host already has a wife. They live apart for much of the time, but there is no chance of another taking her place. I dare say I might be his mistress if I cared for it.’

‘I see…’ Katherine glanced at her curiously. Had that kiss meant nothing to Celestine? ‘Are you attracted to Marcus Aurelius?’

‘As much as I am to most men,’ she admitted and laughed as she saw Katherine’s look of inquiry. ‘Do not be shocked, my sweet Katherine. When you have been married you will understand that all men are much the same and desire only one thing of a woman. Understanding that is the key to getting what you need from them. For as long as you keep them wanting, they will do anything to please you. But their passion soon tires.’