While My Sister Sleeps

‘She just blamed that fellow, too. It’s an irrational thing.’

‘But I blame myself. I keep thinking it should be me on that bed, not Robin.’

He drew her close. ‘No. No. You’re wrong.’

‘Robin’s the good one.’

‘No more so than you. This was not your fault, Molly. She’d have had the heart attack whether you’d driven her or not, and no one–least of all Robin–would have had you crawling along in your car, keeping her in sight the whole time. At any given point, you might have been fifteen minutes away.’

‘Or five,’ Molly said, ‘so the damage would have been less. But if I was the one in a coma, Robin would be able to help Mom. She won’t let me help. What do I say? How do I act?’

‘Just be you.’

‘That’s the problem. I’m me, not Robin. And if they’re right about her brain,’ Molly went on, because her father was so much more reasonable than her mother, and the life support issue was preying on her, ‘this isn’t about life and death. It’s only about death.’ She choked up. ‘About when it happens.’

‘We don’t know for sure,’ he cautioned quietly. ‘Miracles have been known to happen.’

Charlie was a deeply religious man, a regular churchgoer, though he usually went alone, and he never complained about that. He accepted that what worked for him didn’t necessarily work for his wife and his kids. For the first time in her life, Molly wished otherwise. Charlie believed in miracles. She wanted to believe in them, too.

He pressed her cheek to his chest. His warmth, so familiar, broke her composure. Burying her face in his shirt, she cried for the sister she alternately loved and hated, but who now couldn’t breathe on her own.

Murmuring softly, he held her. Molly was barely regaining control when she heard her mother’s returning footsteps. Taking a quick breath, she wiped her face with her hands.

Naturally, Kathryn saw the tears. ‘Please don’t cry, Molly. If you do, I will; but I don’t want Robin seeing us upset.’ She pulled out her ringing cell phone and summarily turned it off. The BlackBerry followed. ‘I can’t talk,’ she said with a dismissive wave. ‘I can’t think about anything right now except making Robin better. But I would like to clean up while the nurse is with her. If you cover for me here, Molly, your father will run me home. We’ll be right back. Then you can go to Snow Hill.’

Molly wanted to argue, but knew the futility of it. So she glanced at her father. ‘Someone has to call Chris.’

Charlie’s eyes went past her. ‘No need. Here he comes.’

Chris had tried to work, but his heart wasn’t in it. He kept thinking about the mess his life was in, and since he didn’t know what to say to Erin, the hospital seemed the place to be. One look at his parents, though, and he had second thoughts. They were grim.

‘No change?’ he asked when he was close enough.

The silence answered his question.

‘The MRI shows brain damage,’ Molly told him.

Kathryn shot her an annoyed look. ‘MRIs don’t show everything.’

‘They need to do an EEG,’ Chris said.

‘Mom wants to wait.’

‘Please, Molly,’ Kathryn said. ‘You’re not helping.’

When Molly opened her mouth to protest, Charlie intervened. ‘She wasn’t being critical, Kathryn.’

‘She’s rushing things.’

‘No. The doctors suggested the EEG. She’s just updating Chris.’ Reaching for Kathryn’s hand, he told Chris, ‘I’m taking your mother home. We’ll be back.’

Watching them leave, Chris saw no evidence that Kathryn was arguing, which made his point. His father didn’t have to say much to be effective. Erin had to understand that.

‘Nightmare,’ Molly murmured.

‘Mom or Robin?’

‘Both. I agree about the EEG. We need to do it, but Mom’s afraid. Chris, the nurse is with Robin. If she leaves, will you go in? I’m going down for coffee. Want any?’

He shook his head. When he was alone, he leaned against the wall. And how not to think about Robin? His earliest memories in life were vague ones of her sitting him in a room and building forts around him, or dressing him up in old costumes. He couldn’t have been more than three. More clearly, he remembered tagging along with her on Halloween night. He would have been five or six then. By the time he was ten, she was taking him down black diamond ski slopes. He wasn’t anywhere near a good enough skier, but Robin was–and with Robin it was all about the challenge.

‘Hey,’ came a familiar voice.

He looked up to see Erin and felt instant relief. He wanted his wife with him now–needed her. ‘Where’s Chloe?’ he asked.

‘With Mrs Johnson. How’s Robin?’

Not good, he replied with a look. ‘The MRI shows brain damage.’

‘From a heart attack? How could she have had a heart attack?’

Chris had passed the disbelief stage and felt a wave of anger. ‘She pushed herself. She was always pushing herself. If a challenge was there and someone could do it, she had to be the one. She already holds every local record and half a dozen national ones. So she wanted to win New York, but she went too far. Why did she have to set a world record? Wasn’t winning enough?’

Erin put a hand on his arm and gently said, ‘That doesn’t matter right now.’

He took a steadying breath.

‘How’s your mom handling this?’ she asked.

He made a face. Lousy.

‘Is your dad any help?’

That revived Chris. ‘Yeah. He is. He doesn’t have to say a lot, but it works. I just saw that. He says two words, and she quiets down.’

‘They’ve been married more than thirty years.’

He shook his head. ‘It isn’t the time; it’s the nature of their relationship.’

‘Chris, I’m not your mom. She and I are totally different. Besides, she’s out of the house all the time. She was even when you kids were little, and I’m not criticizing that. I’m envious. She started Snow Hill back then, and look what it is now. She’s an amazing woman. If I created something like that, I could live with silence at night.’

‘She’s driven.’

‘By what?’

He shrugged. He couldn’t figure his wife out, and she was less complex than Kathryn. ‘So,’ he asked, needing to know, ‘are you going home to visit your mom?’

‘Omigod, no,’ Erin said quickly. ‘Not with Robin so sick.’ Her voice dropped to a whisper. ‘But what’s happening between us isn’t going away, Chris. We will have to deal sometime.’