Hiding From the Light

She turned another page, about to throw down the magazine, then she frowned. She sat up sharply, swung her legs to the floor and sat, staring at the picture in front of her. There were four houses on the page, all in Essex and Suffolk, all smaller than those through which she had been idly leafing. It was the one on the top right hand corner of the page that held her attention. She frowned, looking at it more closely. It was a house she knew.

She read the details with a frown.

15th century listed farmhouse withsmall commercial herb nursery.3 bedrooms, 2 reception.Large farmhouse kitchen.

Garage. Offices. 3 acres.

The house was pretty, colour-washed with exposed beams, an uneven roof, half tiled, half thatched, an oak front door surrounded by the statutory roses. She looked quickly at the other houses on the page. They too were pretty. In fact one was a great deal prettier, but this one was special. Near Manningtree, the details said. North Essex. Minutes from the picturesque River Stour.

It was Liza’s.

‘Miss Dickson?’ It was the second time the receptionist had called her name. ‘Mr Forbes is ready for you.’

She jumped almost guiltily. ‘I’m sorry, I didn’t hear you.’ Fumbling inelegantly for her shoes she rose to her feet, still holding the magazine.

‘Shall I?’ The receptionist held out her hand, ever helpful, ready to replace it on the pile.

Emma shook her head. ‘I’m sorry. I need to keep it. This house –’ She looked up and saw irritation in the other woman’s face. Shrugging, she held it out, then changed her mind. ‘Do you mind if I tear out the page? It’s a house I know.’ She had done it before the woman could object, folding the shiny paper into her handbag and closing the fastener firmly before turning towards the surgery.

The check-up was swift, followed by a change of room, change of chair, brisk polish from the hygienist and she was finished, standing once more on the doorstep staring down the dusty street. Two cabs cruised by in quick succession, glancing at her to see if she was a customer. She saw neither of them. She was still thinking about the cottage which as a child she had known as Liza’s.

Summer holidays away from London. Sailing on the Stour. Riding ponies round the paddock. Great-grandpa’s pipe. Great-grandma’s wonderful cakes. Walking the dogs round the country lanes. There had been all the time in the world, then. Aeons of it. They had walked past Liza’s several times each holidays, always very conscious of the cottage behind its hedge and the secrets it was supposed to hold. They had never gone in, never met the old lady who lived there and in her young mind little Emma had started to weave a fantasy about the place, in which that old lady – Liza – had featured as a character in an increasingly complicated fairy story. As an only child she was accustomed to making up stories in which she featured as the heroine, and this one was no exception. Her parents and great-grandparents had no idea about the story and the adventures which were going on in the little girl’s head, or the extent to which she missed those holidays when her great-grandparents, too elderly to keep up the big country house, had sold up and moved away. She had never gone back to the area.

She descended the steps into Devonshire Place and turned south, walking slowly, aware of the sun’s heat reflecting off the pavement and the house fronts. She was tired and hot and she wanted a cold drink. Reaching Weymouth Street she paused, waiting for the lights to change, then she walked on. The torn page was tucked into the zipped pocket in her bag. There was plenty of time to look at it again when she reached home but she realised suddenly that she couldn’t wait that long. The piece of paper was burning a hole in the bag! She stopped in her tracks and fumbled for it. A business man in a dark suit who had been following immediately behind her almost walked into her. He side-stepped past her, stared for a moment and walked on. Two workmen carrying an old sink out of the front door of one of the elegant houses on the corner edged past her and threw the sink into a skip which had been parked against the kerb. She didn’t notice the cloud of dust and plaster fragments which flew up as the ancient piece of plumbing crashed into the mess of rubbish. She was staring at the picture. When she did look up again she was ready to find a cab.

‘Ma?’ She pushed open the door of the small bookshop off the Gloucester Road, immediately spotting her mother standing by the till. The shop was empty but for a woman with two small children. Peggy Dickson raised her hand. She smiled a welcome then turned back to her customers, slotting two books deftly into a bag and handing it to the smallest child. When they finally left the shop she groaned. ‘I thought they’d never go. It took that woman twenty-five minutes to choose those books. Those poor little kids, they are going to equate bookshops with boredom, dehydration, the need to pee and starvation, in that order, for the rest of their lives!’

Emma laughed. ‘Nonsense, Ma. They were thrilled with their books. That little boy was an academic in the making, if ever I saw one.’

‘Maybe.’ Peggy sighed with exhaustion. An attractive woman in her early sixties, she resembled her daughter in bone structure alone. Their eyes and hair were quite different – Peggy’s hair had once been blonde, whilst her daughter’s was dark; the blonde was now the slightest hint highlighted into the smartly cut grey – but the timbre of their voices was similar. Low. Musical. Elegant.

‘So, my darling, what on earth are you doing outside that temple to Mammon you call an office?’

Emma smiled. ‘I took the afternoon off. It’s very quiet at the moment as it’s August. Everyone is out of the City. I’ve been having a check up at the dentist and I’m on my way to Sainsbury’s. We’ve got Piers’s boss and his wife coming to supper.’ She made a face. ‘Then, I hope, a long peaceful weekend! Do you and Dan want to come over for a drink some time?’

Peggy shrugged. ‘Can we let you know? I’m working tomorrow – at least till lunchtime. I’ll close up if no one comes in, but I don’t know what Dan’s plans are.’

Emma’s father had died in 1977 when she was still a child. Her mother’s toyboy lover – only six months younger than Peggy, but neither of them could resist joking about the age difference – was the best thing that had happened in Peggy’s life for a long time.

Emma fished in her bag again and produced the page from Country Life. ‘Ma, the reason I came over was to show you this. Does this house mean anything to you? Do you recognise it?’

Peggy reached for her spectacles and examined the picture closely. ‘I don’t think so. Why? You’re not thinking of buying a country cottage?’

‘No.’ Emma grimaced. ‘Piers would never hear of it. ‘No. It’s just –’ She hesitated and her face grew sombre. ‘I saw this at the dentist. Don’t you remember? Near where Great-granny lived at Mistley. I’m sure it is.’

Peggy squinted at the page again. ‘We did spend a lot of time there when you were little.’ She chewed her lip thoughtfully, holding the paper closer to her nose. ‘Wait a minute. Perhaps I do remember it now I come to think of it: Liza’s. You think it’s Liza’s? Are you sure, darling? There must be a million cottages that look just like that one. Anyway, it says it’s a farmhouse.’ She took off her glasses and, putting down the page she surveyed Emma’s face, frowning.

Emma nodded. ‘I’m pretty sure it is. I loved that house so much I’d recognise it anywhere.’

Peggy nodded. ‘I do remember now. You used to peer through the hedge and make up stories about that wonderful old lady who lived there. Liza, presumably. They were lovely times, weren’t they. Those holidays seemed to go on forever.’

‘Long, sunlit summers.’ Emma nodded.

Before Daddy died.

Neither of them voiced that last thought, but both were thinking it.

‘Wouldn’t it be strange if it was the same house?’ Peggy put her glasses back on, squinting. ‘It’s very pretty. I’m not surprised you’re tempted. You are tempted, aren’t you?’ She looked up and surveyed Emma’s face shrewdly.

Emma nodded. Somewhere deep inside an idea had taken root.

‘Is this interest a sign you’re feeling like settling down at last? Is it possible, sweetheart, are you feeling broody?’ Peggy surveyed Emma’s face for a moment, then she shook her head. ‘Well, maybe that’s for the best. Not till you’re sure about Piers. And you’re not. Are you?’

Emma frowned. ‘I love Piers, Ma. I wouldn’t do anything unless he agreed.’

‘No?’ Peggy raised an eyebrow. ‘He won’t agree to this, Em. I can tell you that right now!’

2 (#ulink_7c0c5039-8637-566d-a64b-c8d04c8e8270)

Piers stood under the shower for a full five minutes before he stepped out and reached for the towel. He had been expecting Emma to be there when he arrived home from his office but the door had been double-locked, the flat, on the top floor of the converted house at the end of Cornwall Gardens, empty but for two loudly complaining cats. He stopped to give each a brief hello before checking the fridge for dinner party supplies. She couldn’t have forgotten that Derek and Sue were coming over, surely. Hadn’t she said she was taking the afternoon off? Pulling on some cool trousers and an open-necked shirt he surveyed himself for a second in the mirror in their bedroom, checking out his tall lanky figure, smart haircut, tanned skin – even in casual gear he looked cool and sophisticated – before he went into the living room and glanced round. It was tidy as always, a full array of drinks on the top of the low bookcase in the corner. The pale cream sofas, the linen curtains and the wood floor gave just the right impression. Expensive. Elegant. Comfortable. Two young, well youngish, executives with perfect taste. He walked across to the French doors and reached up to the hiding place behind the curtain for the Chubb key, hanging from its little hook. Unlocking the doors he pulled them open and stepped out onto the roof garden. This was Emma’s very own paradise. She had created a little heaven from a sooty expanse between four ugly chimneys. Italian earthenware pots, small trees, roses, honeysuckle, herbs – her special passion – the unexpected riot of colour and sweet scents never failed to take his breath away. Emma’s love for gardening and her indelibly green fingers were one of the unexpected sides to her character which he could never quite reconcile with her astute business brain and the sophisticated lifestyle she shared with him. Closely followed by the two cats, he walked over to the wrought-iron table with its matching chairs and opened the large, bleached-linen parasol. Any moment now the sun would have disappeared behind the rooftops, but the parasol perfected the picture of elegance he so enjoyed up here. And on an evening like this where better to be than a rooftop garden?

‘Piers?’ Emma’s voice broke into his thoughts. ‘Sorry, darling. I got caught in horrendous queues in Sainsbury’s.’ She appeared at the French doors looking, as ever, a city animal, elegant and sophisticated and cool – the furthest one could imagine from a busy shopping queue, or a gardener. ‘I’ve got cold meat. Vichyssoise. Ciabatta. Smoked duck. Salmon. Salad. Strawberries and cream. It’ll take me five minutes.’ She greeted the two cats with a pat on each eager head, joined him under the parasol and held up her own face for a kiss. ‘Put the wine in the fridge. When will they be here?’

He felt obscurely irritated suddenly. She knew when they’d be there. Damn it, she had rung up and fixed it with Sue.

‘Unzip me?’ She turned in his arms just before his kiss landed on target, presenting him with the nape of her neck and the top of a long black zip. ‘I called in on Ma. I thought she and Dan might pop over and have a drink tomorrow.’ With a quick wriggle of her hips she shed the dress. Under it she was naked but for a pair of the skimpiest bikini briefs.

‘Em!’ In spite of himself he glanced round, shocked. He would never get used to this side of Emma. Unconventional. Provocative. Always teasing him.

‘No one can see! Not unless they’ve got binoculars and are standing on top of the power station chimneys!’ She tapped his lips with her finger. ‘Stuffy.’

‘I know.’ He knew he ought to laugh. But he was cross. He wanted her badly. But there wasn’t time. With a groan he ducked into the living room and went to rummage in the wine rack in the corner behind the kitchen door. ‘Dry Hills Sauvignon OK?’

‘The best! Lovely.’ She was still standing naked on the roof.

‘Em! They will be here in a minute.’

She glanced over her shoulder at him coquettishly, then she relented. ‘OK. I’ll jump in the shower. It will take ten seconds to dress.’ As she passed him she brought her hands to her hips briefly and gave a quick shimmy. ‘Not bad for a thirty-something, eh? And look at the teeth!’ She ducked out of reach and ran to the bathroom. In ten minutes rather than seconds she was dressed, her hair brushed, a quick skim of colour on lips and eyelids and she was ready, once again the cool calm City woman, fit partner for a potential director of Evans Waterman, one of the largest City broking houses.

In the event Derek and Sue were half an hour late. By the time they arrived the hors d’oeuvres were laid out on the wrought-iron table, the wine was chilled, the table was laid and the duck and the salad prepared, the duck locked securely away from the enthusiastic attention of the cats.

It was as they moved on to the coffee at the end of the meal that the subject of weekend cottages arose. ‘We have a place in Normandy, you know.’ Sue leaned back against the sofa cushions and crossed her ankles. ‘It would be lovely if you could both come over for a few days.’

Outside, the roof terrace was dark, lit by two shaded lights hidden amongst the flower pots. A gentle breeze wafted the smell of the hot London night into the window. Sue sipped at her coffee. The two cats were asleep on one of the deckchairs outside. ‘Have you ever thought of buying somewhere yourselves?’

‘No.’

‘Yes.’