The Cowboy's Reunited Family

Then he’d look at his daughter, now almost thirteen, and he would think about all of the lost years.

From the front porch he heard Lindsey’s laughter, the dog’s high-pitched bark. Jana was leaning against the window, hugging herself tight as her shoulders shook.

His heart gave in a little. “She’s going to be fine.”

“I know she is. But—” she shrugged “—I did this to her. I took her away from here, from her family.”

“She’s happy, Jana. I guess you can’t miss out on something you’ve never known.”

She turned to face him, wiping away the last traces of tears as the front door banged shut and Lindsey called out, asking where they’d gone to.

“I hope you’re right, because I don’t want to lose her.” Jana stepped past him, smiling at their daughter. “I think you should probably take a nap.”

Lindsey’s gaze flew to Blake. “I just got here. I’m not tired.”

“You’ve had a long day.”

“But I want to see the horses and the stables. Nan said I could come over when I got back.”

“Right, and you will do all of that, Lindsey. But not today. Today you rest.” Jana’s voice was strong again.

“What do you think, Blake?”

Blake didn’t know how to step in, what role to fill. For years he’d been a single man searching for his family. How did he suddenly become the father? After years of parenting alone, would Jana let him take that place? How did a man step in as a father after years of being absent from his daughter’s life?

His daughter looked his way, wanting him to be on her side.

“Lindsey, I think you should listen to your mom. As a matter of fact, I’ll probably head home for a nap myself.” He heard himself say the words with the strong, fatherly voice he’d learned from his own dad. He knew how the job was done, even if he was years out of practice.

“Home?” Lindsey looked from him to her mother. “Isn’t this your home?”

Both Jana and Lindsey looked at him with questions in their eyes.

“It is my home, but for the time being, it’s where you and your mom will stay. I’m staying at the ranch with my parents.”

“Why aren’t you staying here?”

“Because,” he said, wondering if that was a good enough answer. He’d heard parents say it. Because I said so. Lindsey didn’t look like a kid who would accept things just because he said so.

“Because...?” Lindsey looked determined, her chin raised a notch.

Jana smiled at him now, humor flickering in her blue eyes. Yeah, of course she was amused. He almost smiled back. And smiling was the last thing he wanted to do when it came to Jana.

“Because your mom and I aren’t married, Lindsey.” He saw the surprise on Jana’s face. Had it never occurred to her that he would file for divorce?

“But you were. And this is your house.”

“Yes, this is my house. It’s a complicated situation, so for now we’ll just deal with it one day at a time.”

Lindsey walked away, back to the living room. She looked around the big open room and eventually settled in a chair by the window. He would give her anything. But he couldn’t give her two parents who were going to live together. He wanted her to have what he’d had growing up—two parents, a big family.

“Lindsey, you have to understand.” Jana sat on the sofa close to the chair where her daughter sat curled up.

“I do understand.” Lindsey didn’t cry but her voice wobbled. “I understand that I don’t have a family. I understand that you might decide in the next few weeks that we’re not staying here, either. Because we never get to stay anywhere. I’m tired of leaving places, and friends. Most of all, I don’t want to lose my dad again.”

Blake’s thoughts exactly. He brushed a hand through his hair and sank into the leather recliner that he hadn’t spent enough time sitting in. Come to think of it, he rarely spent time in this house. There were too many memories here. Memories of a marriage that had once been amazing, and then quickly over. All in a matter of a few years. He had memories of waving goodbye to his daughter, then of coming home to nothing.

He didn’t blame Lindsey for her anger, for her mistrust. His gaze settled on Jana. She’d bitten down on her bottom lip and pain settled in her eyes.

“We’re not leaving.” Jana’s voice was tight but determined. “I’m not going to do that to you again.”

“But you didn’t like it here before.” Lindsey said the words he’d been thinking.

He remembered Jana telling him in the weeks before she left that she felt suffocated in Dawson, suffocated by his family and by church.

No matter how he felt about Jana, he could deal with it. He had dealt with it for years. He’d managed to work past his anger. Now his job was to help his daughter feel secure.

“Your mom won’t leave, Lindsey.” He sat forward. “She loves you and she won’t leave. We have to trust her.”

He had to trust her. For Lindsey’s sake. Because if Lindsey saw him trusting, she would trust.

Lindsey looked from him to her mom. She had the MP3 player Mia had given her and she was fiddling with the cords. “Mom, I just don’t want to leave. Not now, not ever.”

“I know, and neither do I,” Jana leaned to hug her daughter. “I promise.”

Lindsey nodded, her eyes looking droopy, even to an inexperienced dad. He smiled at her, and she gave him a sleepy smile in return. But he could see in her expression that she believed her mom.

“I’m going to make coffee. Do you want a cup?” Jana offered as she stood in the center of the room looking adrift, not knowing what to do next.

“I’m not drinking a lot of coffee these days.”

“Right, sorry.” She turned to their daughter and Blake watched her face go soft. Lindsey was already asleep. Jana pulled a blanket off the back of the chair and covered their daughter. “I won’t leave, Blake.”

He nodded, because for Lindsey’s sake he would make an effort to trust. But the difference between now and ten years ago was if she left, she wouldn’t be able to take his daughter. She’d have to go alone.

* * *

“I’ll get your water. Do you need anything else?” Jana stood in the center of the living room. The furniture was new and Blake had replaced the area rugs. He’d never liked the area rugs she picked. He’d told her then that they didn’t match this home.

The rugs, like Jana, had been out of place here in the country. The one thing that both she and Blake had loved were the windows that soared twenty feet, giving them an amazing view of the countryside.

It was no longer her home. The little touches that had been hers were gone. The only thing that hadn’t changed was their daughter’s bedroom, with the twin bed covered in a quilt his mother had made. There were stuffed animals, just as they’d left them, and a dollhouse fit for a princess.

If she stayed in Dawson she’d have to get her own place. But first she’d have to get a job. The money left in trust by her parents was running low. She knew if Blake found out he’d suspect her of coming back to Oklahoma for money. Nothing could be further from the truth. She’d used her money to pay for Lindsey’s health care. She’d known all along that after Lindsey’s transplant she’d have to get a job.

She’d buy a little house in Dawson. She’d attend church. She would make this community her home.

Blake’s eyes were closed. She watched him for a moment, lost in thought. She’d always known he was a good man. Someone steady and dependable, a man you could count on.