Cowgirl, Say Yes

Rae stared at her. Then suddenly, she slapped the spoon out of Tess’s hand. It bounced against the floor. “No!” She shook her head over and over, arms flailing. The Mother’s Day card fell to her lap, then slid onto the linoleum.

“Mama,” Tess soothed. “It’s all right.” She rose from her chair, knowing she was probably going to have to call for Molly.

“Goats,” Rae insisted, her mind fighting to communicate the words she so desperately needed to speak.

Tess knew she was fixating on a time in the past, when Raelene’s own mother had a herd of Nubians. It had been nine-year-old Rae’s job to make sure they were put up in the barn for the night, safe from coyotes.

Gently, Tess placed her hands on her mother’s shoulders in an effort to still her motions. “The goats are fine, Mama. You did good. You got them in safe for the night.” Eyes burning with unshed tears, she gave her mother a tender squeeze. “I promise.”

Moisture filled the corners of Rae’s eyes, and thankfully, the irritation drained from her like air from a balloon. She slumped briefly in Tess’s arms, then turned to stare out the window, lost once more in her own silent world.

“Mama, do you want any more pudding?” Tess asked, her hands still resting on Rae’s shoulders. “I can get you a clean spoon.”

“Yes.” But the word held no true meaning, and Tess knew the pudding was a lost cause.

She picked up the fallen greeting card and set it on the nightstand, then placed a kiss on top of Rae’s head. “I love you, Mama.” Sniffing, she wiped a stray tear away and managed to hold back the rest. She’d cried so many tears for the unjust disease that had robbed Rae not only of her mind and body, but of her true self.

“I’ll be back soon,” she said.

Rae didn’t answer as Tess walked quietly out the door.

CHAPTER FOUR

TESS ALWAYS LOOKED forward to Thursdays as one of her days for working at home, and even though this one hadn’t started out on quite the right note, at least everything had ended up okay. She’d easily located the owner of the three stray geldings—Darlene Johnson, who lived about a mile and a half from Joy Isley’s place. Darlene had been frantic with worry over her missing horses and had stopped by the feed store to tack a Lost notice up on the bulletin board.

A loose latch on her corral gate had allowed it to blow open in the night, releasing the horses onto the road while she slept, unaware. Lloyd Vega had talked to Darlene prior to driving out to tow Tess’s truck to the family ranch for repairs, and he’d given her Darlene’s phone number. Tess put her in touch with Joy, helped her dad with the Dodge, then had him drop her off at her place. She’d spent the rest of the day at her computer, then done her chores, fixed a bite to eat and climbed into the shower to get ready for her weekly 4-H club meeting.

Now Tess stood under the spray of hot water, looking forward to the meeting, which was the main reason Thursday had recently become her favorite night of the week. She loved kids, and had quickly found that working with her group of 4-H children took the edge off the stress she faced in dealing with other aspects of her life. She spent three days a week, plus alternate Saturdays, at the feed store. On her days off, Thursdays included, she worked in her home office, a spare bedroom in the back of the rental house, where she did bookkeeping for her father’s ranch and feed store, along with other data processing jobs that came in from a temp service in town. Working at home relaxed her and gave her ample time to spend with her rescue horses. It also allowed her to be readily available should her mother need her in any way. Tess found comfort in knowing she could set her own hours and therefore go to Raelene’s side at a moment’s notice.

The only dark spot she could possibly foresee this evening was that Wade, according to Macy, usually drove his kids to 4-H. Having taken over the group just last week, Tess had been in charge of only the one meeting thus far. On that particular evening, Macy had ridden Amber to the arena, where the riding meetings were held. But as Tess chatted with her new group, she learned that Macy’s dad rarely missed 4-H. At the time, she’d found that admirable. She knew Wade was a widower, and she’d thought it nice that he made the effort to attend his kids’ 4-H meetings. Jason belonged to a group that met on Tuesdays, with boys and girls his own age and older. That group had projects that involved meat animals. Absolutely not for Tess.

Still, Tess took joy in seeing the local kids grow through their accomplishments. 4-H was a youth organization in which volunteer leaders like her taught skills that included everything from cooking to animal husbandry. The majority of the kids in Ferguson and its surrounding areas participated in projects that involved the raising and showing of livestock. Horses were very popular, and Tess thoroughly loved working with Macy and the other children.

Climbing from the shower, Tess reached for an oversize mulberry-colored bath towel and wrapped it around her body, then wound a smaller one around her hair. She needed to call Seth, her youngest brother, to see if he’d give her a ride to town. As if on cue, the phone rang. Gripping the bath towel with one hand, Tess hurried to answer.

“Hello?”

“Hi, Tess, it’s Macy.”

“Macy, what’s up?” Tucking the phone under her chin, Tess reached to scratch behind the ears of the white cat curled on the back of the couch. Immediately, Champ leaped onto the cushions to vie for Tess’s attention.

“Dad said your truck was broke down. Do you need a ride to 4-H?”

Tess grabbed for the phone as it slipped from beneath her chin. “Your dad offered?”

“Well, sort of. I asked him and he said yes.”

Tess smiled to herself. She could just picture Macy conning Wade into giving her a ride. Sure, he’d offered her one in town today, but it had been the polite thing to do, under the circumstances. Somehow, she couldn’t picture him willingly volunteering to act as her chauffeur.

“That’s really nice of you, Macy, but I was just about to call my brother for a ride.”

“You don’t have to,” Macy insisted. “I mean, we’re going to the meeting anyway. And your house isn’t far from ours.”

“True.” Tess curled the phone cord around her finger, picturing the way Wade had looked that morning in his cowboy hat and faded jeans. He was trouble she didn’t need and didn’t have time for. Still, accepting a ride from him would be handier than bothering Seth. Her brother’s place was five miles away, versus two to the Darland ranch. “Okay, Macy, I’ll take you up on that.”

“Cool! We’ll be there about five forty-five.”

The meeting began at six. “Sounds good. Be sure to tell your dad thanks for me.”

“I will. See ya!” Macy hung up and Tess chuckled.

At their first club meeting, it hadn’t taken long for her to feel truly drawn to Macy. She’d known the little girl from Macy’s occasional visits to the feed store with Wade and Jason, but having her in 4-H had given Tess the opportunity to get better acquainted. Macy was spunky and tough, though she seemed to harbor some hidden feelings about her mother’s death. Tess couldn’t help wanting to reach out to her, and wished Macy would open up and talk about Deidra. Maybe with time.

Tess could tell the kid missed having a woman around. It was why Macy went on and on about Bailey and the things they’d done together over the past year. And Tess was pretty sure it was why Macy seemed to be taking a strong liking to her, as well, which was fine with Tess.

She thought of her own birth mother. Tess had been in kindergarten, Seth in first grade and Zachary in third when their mother had taken off. The despair that had washed over her all those years ago still had a way of working itself into the pit of her stomach now and then. Though Jacqueline Vega hadn’t died, she’d still left Tess feeling orphaned. Lloyd had done his best to fill the empty space his wife had left, yet Tess had plunged into a state of withdrawal, closing herself off from everyone.

The comfort she found in caring for her many pets had cushioned her, and she’d reached out to them, wrapping their presence around her like a cloak. She’d taken to nurturing every stray cat and dog, every fallen bird she could get her hands on, somehow needing to reverse her role from child to caregiver. To act as mother to creatures more innocent and helpless than her.

Lloyd had immediately picked up on what his daughter was doing. With kindness and love, he’d joined Tess in caring for her critters, gradually pulling her from the dark place where her little soul had gone to hide. He called it “getting back her sunshine,” and he’d worked hard to make sure that her emotional needs were properly cared for, as well as those of his two boys.

And then Raelene had come along, and Tess had felt loved twofold as Rae stepped so naturally into the role of mother. Unable to have kids of her own, Raelene rejoiced in her new family and thanked God on a daily basis—out loud, right in front of Tess and her brothers—for the children he had brought into her life.

And that was the reason Tess would never, ever abandon Rae. No matter what. Her mother needed her, and she could think of nothing she’d rather do with her time than be there for the woman who’d stood by her and loved her throughout her childhood. No matter how much Rae’s state of mind deteriorated, nothing could ever take away the bond they’d shared. A bond Tess still clung to.

Shaking her thoughts back to the here and now, Tess readied herself for the 4-H meeting. She dressed in a clean pair of bib overalls and a T-shirt, then combed her damp hair into two braids. Adding a ball cap to her attire, she stepped outside just as she heard Wade’s Ford pull into the driveway.

When she opened the truck’s passenger door and locked eyes with Wade, it was the first time in as long as she could remember that she regretted not having taken more care with her appearance. She’d had little time for dating, what with looking after her mother. Not to mention the awkwardness she’d striven to avoid by not bringing a boy home. She didn’t want anyone, not even her girlfriends, to witness Rae’s deteriorating condition. Ashamed of her attitude now, which had been somewhat self-centered back then, Tess nevertheless still harbored some of those feelings. Only, presently they were on her mother’s behalf. If Tess were been in Raelene’s shoes, she wouldn’t want strangers staring at her, wondering about her disease.

And as far as the opposite sex went, a fling with one of her father’s ranch hands when she was nineteen had left Tess wary of repeating the experience. She simply had better things to do with her time. And fussing with hair and makeup wasn’t one of them.

At least she wasn’t in the disheveled state Wade had caught her in this morning, with her hair barely combed and lack of sleep puffing her eyes. Still, she felt like Cinderella after midnight as she slid onto the seat beside Macy.

Wade was dressed in a white Western shirt with silver metallic threads woven through the material, and shiny pearl snaps. His freshly pressed jeans looked new, and his dark hair seemed neatly combed beneath a black hat that wasn’t at all battered and worn. His feet were encased, not in his usual scuffed Tony Lamas, but in a highly polished pair of round-toed, black cowboy boots with a riding heel. A whiff of sage-scented cologne floated her way across the truck’s interior.

“Wow,” Tess said without thinking. “Where are you going all spiffed up?” Did he have a date? Maybe he planned to drop Macy at 4-H and leave. The idea left a strange, sour feeling in the pit of her stomach, though it shouldn’t have. Wade could spend his time any way he wanted.

“What do you mean—where am I going?” Wade practically growled the words as he put the truck into gear, but a playful look in his eyes diluted the force behind them. “I thought we were picking you up for 4-H.”

Self-consciously, Tess fingered the bill of her ball cap, which read Have You Hugged Your Cat Today? “Yep. That’s right.” Groping for something to ease her discomfort, she shot him a crooked grin. “I just wasn’t aware it was a formal occasion.”

“What, this old thing?” he teased, holding out his arms as he looked the front of his shirt up and down. Then he winked, and Tess’s heart did a crazy little flop.

“Dad,” Macy scolded, giving him a shove. “You know those are new clothes.” She turned smugly toward Tess. “He’s being modest. He doesn’t want to shout the fact that he sold his first saddle today, just one hour—” she held up her forefinger “—after our Web site was up and running.”

“Really?” Tess tilted her head in pleasant surprise. Her dad carried some of Wade’s leatherwork in the store, but she hadn’t been aware he was making saddles.

Wade eased off the clutch, focusing on the road ahead as he pulled from the driveway. He glanced at her. “It took me totally by surprise. The guy e-mailed me and it turned out he lives in Deer Creek.” The neighboring town lay ten miles west of Ferguson. “He drove right out and bought the saddle.”