In Close

She couldn’t deny her desire for him. The temptation he posed tugged at her more powerfully the longer she lived without David. But she’d promised herself that she wouldn’t go to his house, wouldn’t get involved with him again. They’d only end up in bed.

But…why would that be so bad? If David wasn’t around to care, to be with her, why hold back?

Suddenly she couldn’t think of a single thing it would hurt. She’d slept with Isaac before. Lots of times. One last hurrah wouldn’t make any difference.

A little voice in her head protested as she trudged off. But the fireworks were over. The whole town was asleep. Unlike her previous trip, she felt completely alone and capable of doing whatever she wanted without anyone’s knowing, and that left her vulnerable to her weaker self, especially now, when she was depressed about the way things had gone with Leanne and the fact that the sheriff had taken the files.

Isaac’s house was completely dark. Even the porch light had been turned off. He was obviously in bed. She felt guilty for disturbing him. Like her, he’d been injured tonight—probably more seriously than she had. But she was standing outside at nearly three in the morning with nothing except a flashlight and didn’t know where else to go. Returning to her car and attempting to drive home didn’t seem feasible when she was so light-headed. She couldn’t even remember what she’d done with her car keys....

Would he get angry if she woke him up?

Maybe he would if she expected him to drive her home. But she didn’t. She only wanted more of what he used to give her—a night of the most exciting sex imaginable. The Isaac she knew wouldn’t object to putting his talents to work, injured or no. After she’d stopped frequenting his place but before she married David, he’d called her many times, always in the middle of the night—just to get her attention, to remind her that he was waiting, willing and hoping she’d come back.

It’d taken her ten years. But here she was.

5

She got him to come to the door. He was groggy and half-asleep, but that was okay. She preferred him to be half-asleep. Had he been any more alert, he might’ve questioned her, made her grovel, maybe even refused her to pay her back for ignoring the attempts he’d made to reach out to her. She’d never forget how upset he’d looked when he chanced upon her and David in the forest shortly after they were married. Isaac didn’t care about her, but he was possessive enough that seeing her with another man bothered him, probably more than he wanted to admit. He’d never reacted with jealousy any other time.

As it was, he seemed a little startled when she pushed him back into the house the moment he opened the door. He asked what was going on, but when she switched off the light he’d just turned on and reached for him, he figured it out fast enough. Becoming instantly alert, and hard just as quickly, he welcomed her into his arms. Then his breath shortened and his hands grew very purposeful as they made their way beneath her clothes.

“That’s it,” she murmured, but she was thinking, At last, when her T-shirt hit the floor and his mouth, with its perfect lips, found her breast.

Allowing her eyes to close, she surrendered completely. She could no longer recall why she’d been denying herself. There were reasons, of course. Just none she was willing to list right now.

When her hands clenched in his thick black hair and she began to gasp, he groaned in appreciation of her eagerness and picked her up in his arms.

Briefly, she thought of his stitches, wanted to caution him not to do anything that could rip them out, but he didn’t seem to be worried or in any more pain than she was. Maybe they were both high on meds. She would’ve laughed that something as unforeseen as an attack could bring them together after the protracted battle she’d fought to stay away. But she knew in her heart that it wasn’t a laughing matter. She’d be sorry tomorrow.

When he placed her on the bed, she expected him to back off long enough to remove the jeans he’d put on to answer the door, expected him to get right down to business. He’d won, hadn’t he? Surely he’d want her to know it, to prove it to her in no uncertain terms. This wasn’t a sweet and gentle lovemaking session likely to progress slowly. She hadn’t meant it to be. Sweet and gentle was David’s territory. When she had sex with Isaac, the need to get closer and closer consumed her. He made her buck and moan.

But he didn’t seem willing to leave her yet, not even for the few seconds taking off his pants would require. He pinned her beneath him, hands above her head, and kissed her in a way that left her in no doubt that he craved what she’d denied him for the past decade.

Soon Claire was so sensitive to his touch she could hardly contain the building excitement. No wonder she thought of Isaac so often, had to fight the desire to visit him on a nightly basis. It’d only been a year since she’d slept with her husband, but it’d been a decade since she’d slept with Isaac. She wasn’t sure how she could feel so strongly about him when she loved David as much as she did, but it was true.

Letting go of her wrists, he covered her breasts with his palms. She could feel his hard length pressing into her stomach as he gently tweaked her nipples. Then she was trying to remove his pants because she couldn’t wait a second longer.

“God, I’ve missed you,” he murmured as he helped rid them both of what remained of their clothes.

She didn’t believe him. How could he miss her if he’d never cared about her to begin with? He missed the sexual release she could provide. Somehow, whatever magic he held for her, she seemed to hold for him, too. They were both cursed.

Or she was projecting. Maybe it wasn’t that way for him at all, just male pride or the refusal to believe he could lose her to someone else. Otherwise, he wouldn’t care that she’d moved on.

Too bad the past went much deeper than merely a release for her. She’d been in love with him. Maybe she still was—a little, anyway. That was the part that frightened her, that made her fear it’d been a mistake to come here. She wasn’t sure how she’d ever find the strength to let go of him again. Not without David to make the difference.

But that was something she’d have to deal with later. For right now, for this moment, she was going to take everything Isaac could give her, grab it all before she had time to rethink her actions or regret them or even acknowledge that this was how it should’ve been with David.

“No one can make love like you,” she whispered.

He froze above her, as if she’d slapped him instead of complimenting him. “That’s what brought you back?”

Did it matter? He had what he wanted. “Yeah. It…it hasn’t been easy for me after David. But this is better than being alone. And since you seem to be free for the night, you don’t have anything to lose, either.”

Silence. Then, “He made you happy.”

“Yes.” And yet she was glad it was Isaac touching her now. But she didn’t add that, because it made no sense.

Isaac shifted so he could rest part of his weight on the bed. “Then…this means nothing to you.”

His voice sounded slightly strangled. She thought it was odd that he’d even ask. He’d certainly never asked before. But they’d been young. And they’d ended badly. She rushed to reassure him that he didn’t have to worry about her acting like a lovesick fool this time around. “No, I’m still totally in love with David. You don’t have to worry.”

“Worry?”

“That I’ll want anything more from you.”

“I see.” She felt his chest rise, heard him take a quick breath.

His reaction confused her. “You’re relieved, right?”

“Of course. David was a…a great guy, a perfect husband.”

“He was everything to me.” Just saying it brought tears to her eyes. David was generous, kind, consistent, transparent. Yet here she was, asking for more of the one thing Isaac could give her, and that was ecstasy.

Still supporting himself on his elbow, Isaac wiped away her tears. “Well, we wouldn’t want you to be lonely....”

Was he being sarcastic? His touch was so…gentle. Damn him. Why did he have to complicate everything?

She tried harder to clarify what she meant. Didn’t he believe her? Was he remembering the last time, how sickeningly she’d clung to him? “We won’t have to acknowledge it ever happened.”

“Maybe you can pretend I’m him.”

That was impossible, but she wasn’t about to explain that no one could compare to Isaac, not even David. “Sure. Maybe. Or it can be like…like it was for you before,” she reminded him. “Just…physical. We don’t have to tell anybody.”

She thought he’d be happy that she’d made it so easy for him. He was the one who didn’t do well with commitments. When she’d told him she loved him the last night they were together, he’d panicked, said he wasn’t the marrying type, that she should find someone who’d make a better husband. He’d even said she was stupid to think he could ever fall for her. So she’d moved on. She’d gotten back together with David, but David had been taken away from her, and now she had nothing.

Except this highly erotic, clandestine meeting with her former lover.

“It’ll be our little secret,” he said.

She breathed a sigh of relief. “Yes.” She didn’t want to start any rumors, didn’t want to answer any questions about him. And she certainly didn’t want to explain to her sister why she’d gotten involved with Isaac Morgan again—not after she’d just warned Leanne to be careful about who she spent time with. “That’d probably be best.”

When there was no response on his part, no movement, either, she began to feel uncertain. “What’s wrong?”

“Nothing,” he replied. But something told her that wasn’t quite true. The way he touched her, the way he made love from that moment on, was different. It almost seemed as if his stitches were hurting him. She asked if he’d changed his mind, but he didn’t answer. He gave her what she wanted, at least on a physical level, but only with his mouth. He refused to fully make love.

She wasn’t sure if he was out of condoms, or he was trying to withhold the one thing she wanted more than any other—to feel him inside her again after so long. Maybe it was neither. Maybe he’d lost his desire for her and she’d only imagined the unbridled excitement she’d sensed at the beginning, because he wouldn’t even let her satisfy him in return.

He finished as if he was merely servicing her, then rolled over to go to sleep, and she lay awake, feeling like an idiot. Why was she asking for more of the same mixed signals, the same confusion, she’d endured ten years ago?