The Heart of Christmas

“Are you looking forward to going out for your birthday tonight?” he asked, changing the subject.

A trip to San Francisco didn’t sound as enjoyable as it had before last night. Although she’d get to see Baxter, who used to be part of their group but moved to the city two years ago, she’d had about as much of turning thirty-five as she could take. Still, she lied to protect his feelings. There was nothing to be gained from making her friends feel sorry for her. “I am.”

“You don’t sound too enthusiastic.” He stopped her as she opened the parlor doors. “Are you planning to tell me what’s going on?”

He knew her even better than the rest of their friends did, since they’d once been lovers. But that was exactly the reason she no longer felt comfortable confiding in him. “No. Thanks, anyway.”

“Regardless of what you might be feeling right now, Sophia and I care about you,” he said. “We all care about you.”

He was referring to their entire circle. “I appreciate you saying so.”

“Hmm...a polite dodge.” He retained his hold on her arm. “You’re really not going to tell me?”

“No. But answer me this. If you were going to leave Whiskey Creek, where would you go?”

He dropped his hand. “You’re thinking of moving away?”

“Probably not forever.”

“Probably? God, Eve, I hope this has nothing to do with me. I thought we’d gotten past last year, but...you seem angry again.”

She wasn’t angry so much as frustrated with her loneliness. And the Christmas season only made it worse. “This isn’t about you. It’s just time I figured out what to do with the rest of my life.”

“Has that been in question? I always thought you’d spend it here, with us.” He gestured at the B and B. “I can’t imagine anyone else running this place. You do such a good job.”

Cheyenne approached before Eve could respond, a look of wonder on her face. “The baby’s really active!” she said, and pressed their hands up against her belly.

Eve could feel the child’s foot. Or maybe that was an elbow jutting out. “Oh, wow,” she breathed. “That’s exciting, isn’t it?”

“I can’t wait to...” Ted’s words drifted off as she glanced up at him, but that sudden catch told her what he’d been about to say. He couldn’t wait to have a child with Sophia.

“This kid is strong.” Cheyenne filled the awkward silence. “Just like his daddy.”

She meant his daddy’s brother, who was also her sister’s fiancé, but she would never admit how she’d gotten pregnant. She didn’t want Dylan to face the fact that he couldn’t give her a child, which was why she’d performed the artificial insemination without his knowledge. Other than Eve, only Presley and Aaron knew how she’d gotten pregnant, because they’d helped facilitate it.

“You’ve been talking like it’s a boy the whole pregnancy,” Ted said, “but Dylan wants a girl. Do you know something you haven’t shared with us?”

“No,” Cheyenne said. “It’s just easier to refer to him as one or the other, and flip-flopping feels weird.”

Eve could have stood there indefinitely, marveling at the baby’s movements. Creating life was such a miracle, a miracle she longed to experience herself.

She wanted a baby—but she didn’t want to have one on her own. Suddenly she sucked in her breath.

“What is it?” Cheyenne asked.

Eve pulled her hand away, but she couldn’t answer immediately. Something was going through her mind, something that hadn’t struck her before and filled her with concern.

“Eve?” Ted said.

“I’m fine,” she mumbled, but she wasn’t so sure. This morning Brent Taylor had pointed out the condom wrapper on the floor when he told her they’d used protection. But there’d only been one, and she was positive they’d made love more than once. She definitely remembered that much. And yet...when she’d thrown away that wrapper, she hadn’t noticed any others.

6 (#ulink_2ad6293a-b7c2-5f6b-877d-0f5ac829f3f1)

Eve’s heart was pounding in her throat when she knocked, rather timidly, at Brent Taylor’s door. She didn’t want to bother him again. He’d apologized for his rudeness this morning, and she preferred to leave it at that.

But if there was a possibility that she might be pregnant, she needed some way to notify him.

She was actually hoping he could tell her there’d been other condoms he’d somehow disposed of himself, by flushing them down the toilet or whatever. But that didn’t seem very likely. How many men carried more than one or two condoms in their wallets?

The door cracked open, and he peered out at her.

“It’s me.” Bracing herself for whatever reaction she was going to get, she drew a deep breath. “I need to speak with you for a minute.”

He said nothing, just swung the door wide enough to let her in, and stepped back.

She walked in and closed it behind her. Lord knew she didn’t want anyone else overhearing what she planned to discuss.

“What is it?” he asked, immediately defensive. “I can’t stay tonight? You want me to move out right now? What?”

“No.” She tucked her hair behind her ears. “You’re fine here until...tomorrow. Or...whenever.”

His face cleared as he sat on the bed. “You seem nervous.”

“I am, a little,” she admitted.

He studied her closely. “If you’re here because...because you want more of what we shared last night, you don’t have to be nervous. The answer’s yes—as long as there are no strings attached. I have certain...limitations.”

Was he serious? From what Eve could tell, he was. But how could he believe she might come back for more after the way he’d tried to distance himself? And what made him think she’d settle for an offer like that?

The shock must’ve shown on her face, because a smile slanted his lips. “I guess your expression answers that question.”

“I’m not...coming on to you,” she explained. “I’m not a ‘no strings attached’ kind of girl.”

“You’re here for some reason.”

“Yes.” She wandered over to the window so she could break eye contact with him. “I’m here because...because I was wondering...”

The bed creaked as he got up. “About...”

She made herself turn to face him. “You know that condom wrapper?”

“We’re back to that?”

“Do you carry quite a few of those?”

“I can always get more,” he said, eyebrows raised.

She rubbed her hands on her thighs. “I’m wondering how many you had to begin with?”