As she looked at him, her smile faded. “You are in pain.”
“No, I’m not.”
She prodded his bad shoulder. He winced.
“It’s nothing. Nothing to concern you, at any rate.”
“I am your wife. If you’re hurting, it concerns me.”
Stop, he silently pleaded. Don’t do that. Don’t come any closer, don’t ask about my wounds, don’t prod at them. Don’t care.
A better man would have been grateful for such sweet concern. And a part of him was grateful. A part of him wanted to fall at her feet and weep. But that bitter, scarred-over half of his soul couldn’t stomach her pity. The devil in him would lash out at her in some unthinking, unforgivable way—until she was so busy licking her own wounds, she couldn’t spare a thought for his.
“Is there anything I can do?” she asked.
“Yes,” he said sternly. “You can let me be.”
See? She looked wounded already. For her own sake, and that of the son she would bear him, he had to push her away.
But he didn’t know how.
Just then—miracle of miracles—Khan had a well-timed bout of usefulness.
The butler opened the ballroom doors and cleared his throat. “Your Grace, I hate to interrupt.”
Ash stepped away from his wife, relieved. “Liar. You love to interrupt.”
“Surprisingly enough for us both, this time I am being sincere. Your solicitor’s secretary has arrived. I’ve shown him to the library.” With a bow, Khan left the way he’d arrived.
Ash gestured toward the door. “I should really—”
“Go manage your dukedom,” Emma finished, smoothing her frock. “Yes, I know. Leaving you alone was my forfeit.”
With a nod of agreement, he quit the room.
Just as well they’d been interrupted, he told himself. Fortunate, even. This marriage wasn’t about games. Pleasure wasn’t the goal. And any form of affection would be disastrous.
He would bed her for a few weeks. With luck, that would be sufficient to get her with child. He would have done his duty.
And then it would be over.
That evening’s dinner was uneventful, and Emma was thankful for it. In fact, the meal was almost too short. She found herself with a surfeit of time to while away before he would visit her.
Mary came up to brush her hair and help her change out of her one and only evening dress. After she’d gone, Emma paced the bedchamber. She stared at the clock, willing it to tick faster. The idea of reading or stitching didn’t appeal—she’d never be able to concentrate. Finally, she decided she might as well prepare the room, and herself. She extinguished the candles and climbed into bed.
As she tucked herself under the quilts and blankets, she admitted the truth.
She wasn’t nervous.
She was impatient.
She wanted to feel his touch again, quite desperately. Not only his touch, but his tenderness. He might be snappish and aggravating during the day, but in the darkness last night, he’d seemed an entirely different man. Patient, respectful. Sensual.
This time, Emma resolved, she wouldn’t ruin it. The sooner this reproduction effort was under way, the better for all concerned.
At last, a knock at the door.
He entered without waiting for her answer.
“Tonight, this will be all business,” he announced. “In. Out. Done.”
Possibly the least seductive words imaginable, but Emma was apparently a madwoman, because they excited her all the same.
He did not bank the fire completely, leaving a bit of warmth and a faint amber glow. With less stumbling than last time, he joined her on the bed. He found the edge of the quilts—she’d limited herself to two tonight—and flung them back in one motion before stretching his body alongside hers. She held her breath, waiting for the first brush of exquisite contact.
“Good God,” he said. “You’re naked.”
Well, this wasn’t off to the most promising start.
“Why would you be naked?”
Had she heard him correctly? Had he truly just asked why she would be naked? How could this even be a question?
“I didn’t disrobe last night only because I thought you might want to undress me.”
He was silent.
“Shall I undress you?” she asked.
“No.” And then, with a tone of resignation, “Let’s just get on with it.”
Oh, now that was too much to be borne. She couldn’t remain silent any longer.
She pushed up on her elbow. “What am I doing wrong? Surely your previous lovers were active participants in the act.”
“Yes, but they were experienced. A few of them professionals. You’re a wife. You’re not supposed to enjoy this, you’re supposed to lie there and endure it.”
“So that’s what you expect from me. A silent, listless partner.”
“Yes.”
“Very well,” she said, disheartened. “I’ll try.”
His hand settled on her thigh, and he nudged her legs apart with a brusque motion.
Then he paused, keeping his hand utterly still.
When he resumed touching her, everything was different.