The Baby Emergency

‘Prepared,’ Ross finished with a laugh. ‘Super Nurse Shelly Weaver, prepared for any eventuality.’

‘Not quite.’ The smile was fading now and Shelly took a sip of her drink, eternally grateful to Ross for bringing it over, glad for something to do with her hands.

‘Did you find out what the sex of the baby is, then? Or are you going to keep us all in suspense?’

‘Sorry?’ Shelly looked up, startled, sure she must have misheard him.

‘You said were going to find out what you were having when you had your scan. Come on, you can tell me. I’m leaving so it won’t get out.’ He was still smiling, his grin so broad and his face so innocent Shelly truly thought he couldn’t have heard the news.

‘I found out a bit more than the sex.’ Shelly took another long drink, wiping away her cola moustache with the back of her hand as Ross just stood there patiently waiting for her to explain. ‘The scan showed up some anomalies,’ Shelly continued, her voice faltering every now and then as she spoke. ‘And after further tests the upshot is that I’m going to have a Down’s syndrome baby, or a special needs child, or whatever the latest buzz word is for it at the moment.’ Her green eyes shot up to his and the tears that were always appallingly close these days sparkled as they brimmed, ready to splash onto her cheeks. The bitter note in her voice was so out of place in her normal sunny nature even Shelly looked shocked at the venom in her voice. ‘I’m surprised you hadn’t heard already. News normally spreads like wildfire around here.’

‘Melissa told me,’ Ross said simply. ‘I’m sorry for what you’re going through. How are you managing?’

‘Fine,’ Shelly said through gritted teeth. ‘It’s not as if I have any choice but to manage.’

‘And Neil?’ Ross probed, ignoring her obvious desire to end the conversation.

‘Not so fine.’ Suddenly her paper cup was coming under intense scrutiny as Shelly fiddled with it in her hands. ‘Neil likes to be in control, likes to have choices, a say in things. He’s having trouble taking in the fact that no amount of second opinions or dollar-waving is going to change the outcome of this pregnancy.’

‘But he’s supporting you?’

Shelly gave a very short, very brittle laugh. ‘Is that what you call it?’ As soon as the words were out Shelly wished she could somehow erase them. Moaning about Neil, no matter how merited, no matter what the circumstances, seemed wrong somehow, but Ross didn’t seem fazed by her outburst. Instead he pulled the shredded cup from her hand, his eyes never leaving her face.

‘I shouldn’t have said that,’ Shelly mumbled as Ross stood there patiently, waiting for her to elaborate.

‘Why not?’ Ross asked simply, when no explanation was given.

‘I just shouldn’t have said anything, that’s all.’ She was almost biting through her lip in an effort to keep the tears back, and had the exit door not been located on the other side of the room Shelly would have turned and left there and then. She hadn’t come here for this. A quick goodbye was all she’d intended, and now here she was on the verge of letting five days of tortured anxiety burst forth and blubbering like an idiot in front of everyone.

‘Oh, Shelly, I’m sorry.’ His voice was suddenly serious, the tone directly hitting the final straw of Shelly’s reserves. As one large tear rolled onto her cheek a strong arm pulled around her thickened waist as he gently led her out of the playroom and into a small annexe where they stood alone and for the first time in days Shelly felt free to let the emotions she had held in check so painfully finally flow as Ross’s gentle voice gently gave her permission to continue. ‘Talk to me, Shelly. I know I’m going, but it doesn’t mean I don’t care. I know there’s nothing I can say, but I can listen.’

‘There’s nothing anyone can say. I’m sick of seeing the pity in people’s eyes, sick of everyone adding up how many weeks pregnant I am in their heads and wondering if it’s too late for me to have a termination. It’s my baby.’ Tears were streaming unchecked now. ‘It’s my baby and I don’t want to get rid of him. So he’s not going to perfect! It doesn’t mean I don’t want him. I should still be allowed to love him.’

‘It’s a boy, then?’

His words were so calm it stilled her, and as she looked up Shelly saw that he was smiling.

‘Congratulations.’

‘You mean that?’

‘Of course I do, Shelly. You’re going to have a beautiful little boy and you’re going to be a fabulous mum. Yes, he’s going to have some problems, need some extra care, but if ever there was a woman who could give a child that then it’s you. It might all seem a jumble now, but you’ll work it out.’

‘Do you really think so?’

‘I don’t think so,’ Ross said emphatically. ‘I know so. You and Neil will deal with this.’

‘What I said before, about Neil, I mean. I was just letting off a bit of steam. He’s upset, which is understandable. It’s hard for him too. All the dreams he had, we had, have just suddenly gone.’ She gave a small laugh, trying to lighten the loaded silence around them. ‘I think Neil had our baby pegged to be Prime Minister one day.’

‘What’s the population of Australia?’

Shelly had no idea where he was leading, no idea where he’d plucked that question from, but her mind whirred away from her problems for a millisecond as she struggled with her appalling general knowledge. ‘About twenty million, at least I think that’s what it is.’

‘The odds weren’t great, then.’

Shelly’s forehead creased as she tried to fathom where Ross was leading. ‘What on earth are you going on about?’

‘If you factor in the rising population, increased immigration, well, suffice it to say…’ His hand moved forward, gently reaching the soft swell of her stomach as Shelly stood smiling at his strange logic. ‘This baby was never going to be Prime Minster. But you can still have dreams for him, Shelly, still cherish his life.’ His hand was still there, she could feel the warmth spreading through her top. The baby was motionless, perhaps feeling the quiet confidence Ross so effortlessly imparted. If only over the awful past few days she had endured Neil could have said just one of the comforting words Ross had conveyed so easily,

‘You’d better get back.’ Her voice was strangely thick. All she wanted to do was lay her head on that chest, feel those strong arms around her, for just an ounce of his strength to somehow rub off on her. ‘And I’ve got to go.’

‘Not yet,’ Ross moaned. ‘I’ll get stuck with Tania. If you think Melissa was bad, just wait till you see how Tania’s behaving. I swear she’s wearing lipstick. I think she’s got a crush on me.’

‘She has.’ Shelly laughed. ‘So watch yourself.’ Pulling her bag over her shoulder, Shelly swallowed hard. ‘I really do have to go. I just popped in to say goodbye. I’ve got an appointment with Dr Forbes at two.’

‘I thought Dr Lim was your obstetrician.’

‘He is. This visit is for Neil. I know it’s not going to change anything, but he just wants another opinion.’

‘Come on, I’ll walk you out to your car and say hi to Neil. It would be nice for us both to put names to faces and maybe I can answer some of his questions. His mind must be working overtime.’

‘Neil’s at work.’ She saw a hint of a frown mar Ross’s near-perfect features and instantly jumped on the defensive. ‘He can’t take an afternoon off work every time I see a doctor, he’d never get anything done.’

‘Of course not.’

There was a tiny awkward moment as Shelly turned to go. What should she do, shake his hand? A casual wave as she got to the door? Ross answered the question before it had even formed in her mind. Pulling her towards him, he held her for a moment, her bump pressing against his toned abdomen, until he moved away just enough to place his hand on her swollen stomach. ‘Look after that mum of yours,’ Ross whispered to the babe beneath his hand. ‘She’s one in a million.’

A tiny kiss was aimed at her cheek but Shelly moved nervously, his lips grazing hers for less than a second, but it felt as if they were both moving in slow motion, every tiny movement magnified, the soft warmth of his mouth on hers as unexpected as it was welcome, and Shelley swallowed hard as he pulled away, biting back tears as he squeezed her shoulder in one final supportive gesture and then he was gone. Off to his party, off on his travels again, off to the outback to impart and absorb, a million miles away from Chisholm Hospital, from the beach and the world he’d become so much a part of in the six months he’d been back.

Her lips were burning from his briefest touch and Shelly shook her head as she walked, her speed increasing as she pushed the unwelcome stirrings from her mind.

Of course Ross Bodey was going to say the right thing, he was a doctor, for heaven’s sake! He’d just spent the last six months on a children’s ward, dealing with anxious parents and sick kids. Of course he knew how to handle her, that was his job. She was being unfair, comparing his reaction to Neil’s.

Neil was the one living it. Neil was the one whose life had changed for ever when they’d found out the news.

Still…

Starting her car, Shelly pulled off the handbrake and indicated to turn right, gliding into the afternoon traffic as she headed for her doctor’s appointment, for an afternoon of scans and blood tests, an afternoon of being prodded and poked in a futile attempt to obtain a different version. A little piece of news that might brighten Neil’s day. But no amounts of scans, no amount of technology or statistics were going to change the outcome. Their baby was handicapped, and no amount of wishing was going to change that fact.

But she could still have dreams for him.

Ross’s words washed over her, a soothing interlude in an awful day. And in the weeks and months that followed they comforted her with increasing regularity, a life raft to cling to in the turbulent times that followed.

She could still have dreams for her son.

CHAPTER ONE (#u0dd62d50-f069-5099-a649-03b4dac81cab)

‘SORRY, darling.’ Marlene put down her basket on the hall floor and haphazardly deposited a kiss on Shelly’s cheek. ‘The match went on for ever.’