Sicilian's Baby Of Shame

Birthdays had always been about family and standing around a cake while having a hundred photos taken.

Not this time.

It had been the same at Christmas—and the reason she had been so grateful that Alim ensured his staff celebrated also. Her flatmates had all gone home to be with their families and so the meal and gift from work had been the only Christmas that Sophie had had.

‘They must miss you,’ Bastiano said, but Sophie shook her head.

‘I’m not sure that they do. I come from a big family; they wanted me married so that there would be one less. You know how things are back home.’

He nodded. Bastiano did know how things were for many but then he looked at Sophie and was still sure of one thing—they must miss her, because from the moment she had opened the drapes it had been as if an extra ray of sunshine had been let in. ‘Will you go back?’

‘I’m their only daughter...’ She shrugged but it belied the pain behind the inevitable decision. ‘If I return then I am to abide by their rules. I don’t know what will happen. For now, though, I live my dream.’

Even if it was lonely at times.

‘What about you?’ she asked.

‘I don’t have any family.’

‘None?’

He shook his head and he saw that she waited for him to elaborate. ‘I was raised by my mother’s brother and his wife.’

‘What about your mother?’

‘She died.’

‘How old were you?’

He didn’t answer.

‘What about your father?’

‘You know as much about him as I do—nothing.’

‘Not quite.’ Sophie smiled. ‘I know that he was good looking.’

Yes, she was like sunlight because until now, when he had revealed that his father was unknown, it had either terminated the conversation or resulted in averted eyes or a derisive comment. Not with Sophie, for she turned the awkwardness around as she smiled—and possibly flirted—and the conversation was far from closed.

‘What happened with your zia and zio?’ she asked.

‘I see them on occasion but we don’t really speak,’ Bastiano said, peeling off some brioche and handing it to her to mop up the last of the spicy sauce. ‘They threw me out when I was seventeen.’ He thought of the row they had had after the affair had been exposed and it had come to light that he had slept with the enemy—a Di Savo. ‘Deservedly so.’

‘So what are you doing here in Rome?’ Sophie asked. ‘Business?’

‘In part,’ Bastiano said, but knew that he was being evasive. Sophie obviously had no clue that he was considering purchasing the hotel. He didn’t want to enlighten her for he knew that it would put a wedge between them. So to avoid speaking of work he told her something rather personal. ‘I got dumped last night.’

‘Oh!’ She smiled at his revelation. ‘I cannot imagine anyone dumping you.’

‘Neither could my ego,’ Bastiano admitted, and then he told her a bit more. ‘She’s English and lives in a castle.’

‘Nice,’ Sophie said, and he shrugged.

‘It would have been a lot of work.’

Sophie frowned, not sure what he meant by that.

‘What was your fiancé like?’ he asked, curious about the man she had left behind.

‘He was a lot older than me, more than forty years old,’ Sophie said, and screwed up her face.

‘Is that why you ended it?’

‘Not really.’ She shook her head. Looking back at that time, she remembered that moment when she had felt as if she could see her life spreading out before her, and not liking what she saw.

Sophie had never discussed it with anyone and perhaps she should not now but there was nothing regular about this morning. She had never met anyone who felt less like a stranger before. Bastiano knew more about her than her flatmates and she had lived with them for a year. More about her than Gabi, for she had been a touch elusive of late and their catch-ups had petered out. And he knew more about her than her parents, for they had never once asked for her take on things.

‘Luigi came over to my parents’ for dinner, as he often did...’

Bastiano said nothing, he even fought a slight eye rise, but at forty shouldn’t the guy have at least been entertaining her?

Sophie glanced at him—the truth was a touch personal, but his eyes were patient and finally there was a person to whom she could speak her truth.

‘That night I felt a little sick and didn’t really eat much. When my mother took away the plates and my brothers and father left us alone he asked what was wrong with me. I told him that I had gone on the Pill.’ She blushed just a little as she said it but far less than she had when she had told her fiancé. In fact, Bastiano seemed completely at ease with the sensitive topic.

Unlike Luigi.

It hadn’t been up for discussion. Sophie had had to find everything out for herself. Even the village doctor hadn’t been particularly friendly. In the end, it had been her friend at the bakery who had told her that she could skip her period entirely if she chose.

‘What was his reaction?’ Bastiano asked.

‘He seemed cross. He said, “Why would you go on that?” Then he told me that he wanted children straight away and a lot of them!’

She pulled such a horrified face that Bastiano laughed.

And there was that thunder again, only this time she was counting the minutes, for the delicious storm drew closer with each revelation and with each passing word.

‘I said that we needed my wage from the bakery and my mother came in from the kitchen. She didn’t hear the part about the Pill, of course, just me saying I would put off having children so I could work, and she said she would look after them. It’s not that I don’t want children...’

He halted her when she tried to further explain for there was no need.

‘Sophie,’ he said in that rich voice of his, ‘well done for running away.’

Bastiano was the first person she had really told about it and his reaction made her feel warm with pride for her choice, rather than sick with shame as her family had. ‘Thank you.’

Oh, they were as natural as that, for Bastiano, who rarely bothered with conversation, was telling her some more about himself.

‘I flew Lydia over from England with her stepfather, Maurice, under the guise of business. We were supposed to be meeting in the bar and then going out for dinner but when she turned up she said that she was going out with friends instead.’