Transform Your Life: 10 Steps to Real Results

Key Insights Gained from Step 1

Quick Wins Gained from Step 1

The Action Steps I Will Now Take

Real Results

(To maintain confidentiality, names have been changed.)

Martin IT director, single, 40s

Martin was in a fast-paced, financially rewarding career, but was feeling run down and demotivated. Successful on the outside, he felt empty on the inside. He wanted to find a sense of satisfaction and achievement in his life, but didn’t know where to start.

The Value of Coaching

To help Martin see the bigger picture of his life, restore his integrity so he had a clear idea of what he wanted to do rather than what he felt he ‘should’ do, and clarify his priorities, so he could move forwards on his own terms.

Life Perspective Questions

These made Martin realize how he’d always been focused on his work and bank balance and had lost sight of other things in life. He realized that if money wasn’t an issue for him, he’d start studying a language and learning new skills. Also, he loved photography and would like to learn more about it and maybe become a professional photographer. He was surprised by his own answers and realized he wanted to express his buried creativity.

The Wheel of Life

Martin’s wheel was totally out of balance, with high scores for money and career and low scores for everything else. This was a clear indication that he’d been burying his head in the sand for too long. No wonder he felt empty. I challenged him to leave work earlier several days a week and plan more personal time for himself.

Set Yourself Up for Success

Martin acknowledged he was out of alignment, feeling stressed, drinking too much and running on adrenalin. He realized he was living his life according to quite a few ‘shoulds’, which were mostly based around earning money, of which he already had reserves. I challenged him to think about what he ‘wanted’ to do instead. His list of ‘wants’ included doing more photography, learning to cook and to speak French, playing the stock market and socializing more.

Real Results

Martin started addressing his health and well-being, joined a gym and scheduled in sessions three times per week, with the result that he started to feel more energetic. His physical environment was uninspiring and he’d ignored his home, so he employed a cleaner and his sister-in-law agreed to help him clear out his kitchen, make new curtains and give the place a make-over. This started to get him motivated. He also decided to convert the spare room into an office, so he could spend fewer hours at work. He bought a computer and developed a power-base at home. He looked at improving his social life, planned a dinner party once a month and joined a dating agency to meet new people.

‘I now have a five-year plan that involves leaving work, undertaking various streams of education that will include doing an MSc and an MBA and studying maths and a foreign language and culminate in developing a business plan and doing a PhD. Even if I do not actually complete all these things I still know that the journey will lead to a rewarding change to my life. I feel more positive about life.

Short-term, I have been on a photography holiday, am actively developing photography as a hobby and have framed some prints to decorate my home. My social life is pretty active now and I’m fitter, more energetic and healthier than I’ve been for years.’

Build The Right Foundations (#ulink_be4e1d15-39ef-5424-b0ff-e55c9fbd8a2b)

Luck is when preparedness meets opportunity.

Earl Nightingale

Overview

If you want to transform your life and turn your dreams into reality, it goes without saying that you need to develop the right foundations first. A launch pad requires strong foundations from which a rocket can reach into the sky. My role as your coach is to ensure that you have the strongest foundations possible on which to build your life.

To set yourself up for success, I want you to make sure you’re taking the best possible care of yourself. As you work through Step 2 you’ll be encouraged to integrate regular habits into your life and to build a strong support framework and power base.

You may be tempted to charge ahead with goals and plans, but the time you spend on creating your foundations is an investment that will pay off for the rest of your life.

When you’ve completed this step:

You’ll be taking exceptional care of your physical, mental and emotional well-being.

You’ll have established regular habits to support you for the rest of your life.

You’ll have identified a team of people to support you as you transform your life.

You’ll have created an inspirational environment and a strong base to work from.

You’ll have set up invaluable systems and resources to bring out your best.

Personal Reward for Completing Step 2

Write down here how you will reward yourself when you have completed Step 2:

Quick Transformation Quiz

Answer the questions below by ticking the appropriate box and calculating your score as follows: 2 points = Yes/Agree/Not Applicable, 1 point = Agree sometimes, 0 point = No/Disagree

Initial Score

Score on Completion of Step 2

Final Score on Completion of Book

Motivation is like food for the brain. You cannot get enough in one sitting. It needs continual and regular refills.

Peter Davies

Take the Best Care of Yourself

If you want to transform your life, you need to transform yourself first. To do this, it’s important to make your own self-care your number one priority.

I’d like to make a distinction here between self-care and being selfish, as these two terms are quite different. Some people feel uncomfortable about putting their own self-care first, thinking it a very selfish way of behaving. From a coaching point of view, self-care is a ‘self-ful’ activity, not a ‘self-ish’ one. The more you work on yourself, invest in yourself, take care of yourself and fill your own cup, the more you have to give others. I actually believe it’s selfish not to take care of yourself first. When you neglect yourself you’re running on empty tanks, which drains energy from other people rather than supports them. Remember, you can’t give what you don’t have, so unless you love and nurture yourself first, you won’t be able to give these gifts to others.

How did you score your health and well-being on the Wheel of Life in Step 1? How did you score on the Transformation Quiz? You’ve probably already gained a few clues as how you can take better care of yourself.

List the ways you’re currently taking care of yourself. What are you doing to put yourself first?

Surprisingly few of us are as kind to ourselves as we’d like to be. Late nights, excessive eating, drinking, smoking and other bad habits don’t do you any favours. I challenge you to take action now to take the best possible care of yourself – for a start, why not book yourself in for a massage, spend more time with friends, have a fabulous haircut or do more of something you really enjoy?

Are You Getting Sufficient Sleep?

A common issue I address with clients is one of adequate sleep. These days few of us get as much sleep as we really need to operate at our best. Whether you’re someone who needs eight hours each night or someone who can function quite happily on only six hours is for you to decide. Why not track the number of hours sleep you are actually getting over the next week and compare it with the number of hours you know you really need? Do you need to make any changes here? I would like you to put a system in place to ensure that you have a regular pattern of perfect sleep for you. I challenge you to go to bed no later than 10 p.m. at least one night per week!

My ideal sleep pattern is: