The Cowboy's Family Christmas

The puzzlement on his face was almost her undoing. He seemed genuinely disconcerted.

“I feel like there’s this gap between us I don’t know how to bridge,” he said.

Then, to her dismay, he took that one step separating them and fingered a strand of hair away from her face. She closed her eyes, her own emotions in flux. Her hand twitched at her side, longing to come up and cover his. To reconnect with someone she couldn’t forget.

But then she heard Austin cry out and she was doused with icy reality.

“I should go check on him,” she said, moving away from him.

“Can I come with you? I haven’t seen him yet today.”

His casual request was like an arrow in her heart. How could he act this way around Austin? How could he simply relegate him to one corner of his life? Like he didn’t matter?

Her indignation and frustrated fury with him rose up. But behind that came a quiet question.

Maybe if he saw Austin face-to-face again he might relent. Maybe seeing him again would make a difference.

Really? If seeing him yesterday hadn’t, why would it now?

Her mind did battle with herself as she recalled his coldhearted texts of rejection. The replies she typed out with trembling fingers on her cell phone, alone, pregnant and uncertain of her future.

“Please?” he asked, the pleading note in his voice easing away her resistance.

“Of course you can,” she said, determined to be an adult about this, tossing out one last-ditch effort to make him own up to his responsibilities. “He’s your son after all.”

Chapter Four (#u3f51a7ab-80d9-5f9e-ad9e-9b67f6b4e2cf)

Her words hung between them, echoing in the silent kitchen. Soft-spoken, but they rocked his soul. He felt like he was fifteen years old again and being tossed off the dock at Cedar Lake. Suspended in the air in disbelief, wondering what it would feel like when he went in.

“My son?” He choked the words out.

“Yes. Austin is your son,” she said, her words sounded like they came from far away.

“My son?” he repeated, feeling like an idiot.

“I know I could keep him from you and not let you see him. That would be what you deserve, but I’m trying to take the moral high ground here. After all, you’ll be here every day. You can’t avoid him the entire time.”

Reuben stared at her, trying to catch up one word, one phrase at a time as he surfaced to the truth.

“What are you saying? What do you mean?”

Leanne glared at him, eyes narrowed. “Please do me a favor and stop acting so surprised.”

“But I am.” He struggled to settle the information, his mind ticking back, trying to think, to organize thoughts he couldn’t pin down.

“I don’t know why you are,” she snapped. “This certainly isn’t news to you. I still can’t believe how casual you’ve been about the whole thing. You came flying onto the ranch and when you saw him, you acted like he was just some other kid, like he was—”

“My nephew,” he interrupted. “Which he is. Dirk’s son.” Why was she saying Austin was his son? If that was true, why hadn’t she told him before? Why wait until now?

Leanne shook her head, and her narrowed eyes latched on to him. “He’s not Dirk’s. He’s yours. The same kid I told you about over three years ago. The same kid you told me you didn’t want to have anything to do with.”

He held his hands up, still trying to absorb what she was saying. “Whoa, what do you mean, I didn’t want to have anything to do with him? This is the first I’ve heard about this.”

“How can you look me straight in the eye and lie like that?”

“I’m not lying. How...when...” He caught himself. “Let’s back up here. You got pregnant. Are you saying—”

“It happened at your cousin’s wedding. The ‘mistake’ we both agreed we had made,” she made sarcastic air quotes, hooking the air with her fingers.

He could only stare at her, trying to digest all this.