Flint Hills Bride

She had discovered a few years back that she enjoyed cooking. The warmth of the kitchen and the pleasant smells were very relaxing. She found herself humming as she chopped.

She stopped midphrase when the door opened to admit Christian, Jake and Perry. A cold breeze came in with them, and she shivered. After she and Martha had greeted them all, she discovered Jake’s eyes on her and felt herself warm too quickly. No, it was just the heat from the stove dispelling the chill.

Jake, his eyes still on her, grabbed Christian’s arm. “What’s she doing in the kitchen?” he whispered in awe.

Christian chuckled. “Strange sight, I know.”

“I’m cutting up vegetables for tonight’s stew.” She managed to sound irritated even though they made her want to laugh. “What does it look like I’m doing?”

He removed his hat and came slowly toward her. “You’re in the kitchen, Emily. Working.”

She glared at him, aware of an audience. “And?”

He stopped near her, bringing cool air with him. Emily felt it caress her warm cheeks. She hadn’t realized how much heat the stove was putting out until the past few moments.

“Are you feeling all right?” he asked.

She wondered if her face was flushed then realized he was still teasing her about working. “I’ll have you know,” she began, pointing at him with the tip of her knife, “I’ve become quite handy in the kitchen.”

“I’m impressed.” He grinned at her as he shed his coat. Instead of taking it and his hat to the hooks in the back hall, he leaned against the counter beside her. “You even kind of enjoy it, don’t you?”

She returned her attention to the chopping board, giving him a brief nod. When he didn’t move away, she looked up to find him watching her. Christian had left, presumably to hang up his coat, and Perry was helping Martha set the kitchen table for the Rawlins’s meal. She asked softly, “Can I talk to you after dinner?”

“Of course.”

“I’ll take a walk—” She had almost told him the path beyond the barn. That was where she hoped to meet Anson when he came for her. It wouldn’t do for Jake to think of it as her usual place to walk. She suggested the opposite direction. “How about meeting me past your parents’ house?”

“Fine,” he said, and moved away.

She found herself breathing easier when he was gone. She didn’t like deceiving her family, and she didn’t like using Jake. That was why she had felt breathless when he was so close. That and the knowledge that he was attracted to her.

After dinner, Emily donned her cloak and gloves and left the house. Willa had wanted to go with her, and she felt guilty about leaving her, even though it would have been impossible to take her along.

She had tried at first to dissuade the child by telling her it was too cold, but Willa had said she had a warm coat and hat. Next she said she would be walking too far for a little girl, but Willa claimed to have walked miles without getting tired. Finally Lynnette had stepped in, telling her that sometimes grown-ups needed time alone.

She knew the path she followed well enough to walk without much attention to her surroundings and quickly sank deep in thought. Guilt for disappointing the child added to what she already felt and made her miserable. She couldn’t lose courage now. Her family was giving her no choice.

She had to see Anson and tell him what she suspected. To do that, she had to mail his letter. And for that, she needed Jake.

A figure suddenly appeared in the path before her, and she stumbled back, losing her balance. A hand caught her arm, righting her before she fell. “I didn’t mean to scare you.”

“Jake.” She sighed with relief. “I didn’t realize I had come so far.”

“You looked pretty distracted.”

His breath made little white clouds in the cold air. He still held her arm; in fact, he had stepped closer. She had been this close to him before, but couldn’t remember ever being quite so aware of him. Her stomach shivered, from the cold, she tried to tell herself, or from recently being startled. She should step away, pull herself together.

Instead she looked up into his eyes. It was a mistake. They burned into her, seared her to the core with their heat. She gasped as her body reacted.

His eyes softened immediately. “Are you all right?”

She nodded, stepping away. Of course she wasn’t all right. Nothing was all right. She wanted to scream at him for making her feel this way, but that would hardly suit her purpose.

She gave him a smile that she hoped looked shy—she didn’t dare try seductive—and said, “I have a favor to ask.”

“Then ask.” His voice was so kind she felt a new rush of guilt. She had a fleeting thought that she had never heard Anson’s voice sound like that, and quickly brushed it away.

“I have a letter I need you to post for me.”

Suspicion was easy to read in his narrowed eyes. “Why ask me? Why not your brother or whoever’s going into town?”

“Please, Jake, none of them will do it.” Quickly, before he said no, she turned around, opened her cloak and retrieved the letter from her bodice. “Here.” She heard the uncertainty and pleading in her own voice.

“Emily.” There was a plea in his voice, as well. “Don’t ask me to do this.” He closed her cloak, rebuttoning it against the cold she had barely been aware of. “Your family doesn’t want you to contact him. I don’t want you to contact him.”

“You said you wouldn’t judge him.” She thrust the letter toward him, hoping once he took it in his hand he would give in.

“I tried not to. I want the best for you, Emily. I just can’t believe he’s the best.”

“How is it your place to decide what’s best for me?” She was failing. He was too stubborn. She felt tears sting her eyes and tried to blink them away. He would think she was using them as a weapon.

“You’re right.” He lifted the letter from her fingers. “Friends need to trust each other. And count on each other. I’ll mail your letter.”

“Jake.” She threw her arms around him, pressing her cheek against his chest. “I knew I could count on you,” she murmured.

His arms encircled her, holding her closer. The tears she had held back earlier trickled down her cheek. She was warm and safe in his arms and reluctant to leave them.

Finally he drew her away. She quickly brushed the tears from her cheeks and smiled up at him. “Thanks, Jake,” she whispered.

He nodded solemnly. She thought for a moment that he would say something, but he slipped the letter into his coat pocket, stepped around her and walked away.

Jake walked into his parents’ home, knowing it was empty. His mother would be busy at the Prescotts’ until well after supper. If his father finished whatever Christian needed him to do this afternoon, he would be more likely to spend his free time with his wife in the big house than to come back here. No, he would be alone, and that suited him.

The house was dim, but he didn’t light a lamp. He stood across the room from the front window and watched for Emily to walk past. He should have taken her arm and seen her safely to her door. He should still do it.

But he couldn’t He didn’t trust himself to be that close to her. He was liable to take her into his arms and tell her he loved her. He had come too damn close already.

He saw her pass on the path, her head down, walking fast. She would be safe and warm in no time. He didn’t have to feel guilty. He took a step closer to the window, then another, to watch her until she was out of sight.

Why did he let her do this to him? He should thoroughly dislike her for falling for that jailbird, for defying her parents, for using him.

For not wanting the love he was so willing to give her.

He was a fool. It was that simple and too late to change.

He unbuttoned his coat but didn’t take it off. The room was cold, and he didn’t want to light a fire. He wouldn’t stay here long. He pulled the letter from his pocket and studied the clear, even lettering. Anson Berkeley. He wanted to destroy it, not mail it! He wanted to light that fire after all and watch the letter turn to ashes!

The violence of his reaction horrified him. He didn’t trust himself to hold on to the letter for long. He shoved it back into his pocket and rebuttoned his coat. If he left now he could make it back before dark.