Daddy’s Little Princess and Will You Love Me 2-in-1 Collection

‘Of course.’

I lay on the bed beside Paula and cuddled her until she turned over, ready for sleep. I gave her a kiss goodnight and then came out and went downstairs and into the living room where Adrian and Beth were looking at some books. They asked if I could read them some stories, which I was happy to do. Although they could both read, like most children they still liked to be read to sometimes, and since Beth’s telephone contact had stopped she’d got out of the routine of going into Paula’s room to listen to her story. I read the books they chose and we talked about the stories until it was time to begin their bath and bedtime routine.

Later, when all the children were in bed asleep, I sat alone in the living room, a single parent again, and watched the news on television. Toscha, sensing I needed company, jumped onto my lap and, purring, licked my chin, which made me smile. She spent some time curling herself into a ball and I stroked her luxuriously soft, silky fur. It was comforting. The weather forecast was now showing on the television, with the presenter saying the temperature was already dropping and icy rain was forecast during the night. Drivers should be aware of the treacherous road conditions and needed to take extra care. I hoped John made it to his hotel before the worst of the weather set in. I worried about him when he was away. He meant the world to me and I couldn’t bear the thought of anything happening to him.

I went to bed at eleven o’clock but was awoken at two by Beth having a nightmare. I heard her shout out and, grabbing my dressing gown, I hurried round the landing and to her room. She was sitting upright in bed looking petrified, with tears on her cheeks. ‘Oh, Cathy!’ she cried, stretching out her arms to me. ‘I thought my daddy was dead. I thought Jessie had phoned and said he was dead. He’s not dead, is he?’

‘No, love,’ I said, holding her close. She gripped my arms. ‘Your daddy is in hospital, getting better. He’s not dead. You had a bad dream, that’s all. It’s gone now.’

‘It was a very, very bad dream,’ Beth said, breathless from shock. ‘It was so real. I thought he really was dead, and I was all alone.’

‘You’re awake now, and your daddy is in hospital,’ I said again. ‘He’s safe.’

Gradually her sobbing eased and she relaxed her grip on me. I persuaded her to lie down and I drew the duvet up to her chin.

‘Can you stay with me and stroke my head until I’m asleep, like my daddy does?’ she asked.

‘Of course, love.’

I sat on the bed and in the half-light coming from the landing I gently stroked Beth’s forehead until she fell asleep. I crept out of her room, quietly pulled her door to and returned to my room. I could see why Beth would have a dream about her father dying. With no information and all contact abruptly halted, it was like a bereavement to Beth, and her subconscious had dealt with it as such, in a dream.

The following morning when I opened my bedroom curtains I saw that a thick hoar frost had settled in the night. Coating the gardens and houses, it gave the outside world a magical fairy-tale quality. It was very pretty. As I woke the children and opened their curtains, I pointed it out so they too could appreciate the beautiful scene. Although the gritting lorries had been out on the main roads, they hadn’t touched the side roads and I didn’t want to risk driving. I left time for us to walk to school. The shrubbery we passed glistened white in the rising sun and the frosty spider webs hanging on the foliage were truly works of art.

In the playground it crossed my mind that perhaps I should go into school and see Miss Willow to update her – that Beth wasn’t seeing her father – as well as possibly learning something new from her. I now thought it was very likely that Jessie’s visit to the school had been in connection with Beth. However, I decided against going in. I thought I shouldn’t make a habit of popping in without a prior appointment, and if Miss Willow had something to tell me then she’d ask to see me, as she had done on Beth’s first day with me.

Once Adrian and Beth had gone into school, Paula and I returned home and I spent most of the morning listening out for the telephone, hoping it would be Jessie with good news, or at least news. The telephone rang only once and it was a friend of mine wanting to arrange to meet for coffee. If Jessie didn’t phone then I’d call her the following day. That afternoon I took Paula to the mother and toddler group we usually attended two afternoons a week, and I switched on the answerphone before I left the house. The group met in the local community centre and it gave mothers of young children the chance to meet and talk to each other over a cup of tea, and their toddlers the chance to play with similar-aged children. It was also good preparation for children, like Paula, who would be starting nursery in a few months. At the end of the afternoon I went straight from the group to school to collect Adrian and Beth.

The first thing Beth asked when she came out was: ‘Did you speak to my social worker? Can I telephone my daddy?’

‘She hasn’t phoned yet,’ I said. ‘But there’s still time.’

Beth’s face set in anger.

‘If Jessie doesn’t phone today, I’ll phone her tomorrow,’ I said. It had only been Friday when Jessie had telephoned, so I thought I should give her a day or so to make her enquiries and get back to me as she’d said she would.

Beth scowled at me and I ignored it. I could understand why she was angry. Thankfully she didn’t make a scene and recovered quickly.

There were no messages on the answerphone when we arrived home. ‘I’ll telephone Jessie tomorrow,’ I confirmed again to Beth. ‘But please don’t get your hopes up, love. We don’t know what Jessie will say.’ For I thought Beth was pinning too much on the phone call.

‘Jessie might say I can telephone my daddy,’ Beth said, undaunted.

‘Or she might say you can’t,’ I said, being truthful. ‘If she does say that, then I’ll try to find out the reasons why.’ Which I thought would help make any decision of Jessie’s easier for Beth to accept. I was wrong.

Chapter Fourteen

The Meeting (#u153a148d-b658-5d7d-90bf-6da2e4de43fa)

The following day I gave Jessie until two o’clock to telephone me and then I telephoned her. ‘It’s Cathy Glass,’ I said as she answered her extension. ‘Beth’s carer.’

‘Yes, I know who you are,’ she said. ‘How can I help you?’

The question threw me, as I’d assumed she’d realize what I wanted. ‘I was wondering if there was any news on Beth’s father,’ I said.

‘He’s still in hospital,’ Jessie replied.

‘Yes, I thought he must be. But do you know when Beth can start telephoning him again? She really misses him. And I haven’t been able to give her a reason why she can’t phone.’

‘Did you tell her my manager and I had made the decision?’

‘Yes. But it would be useful if I could tell her the reason for the decision.’

There was a short silence before Jessie said, ‘I was going to telephone you later. I need you to come in to a meeting, here at the council offices.’

‘Oh, I see,’ I said, taken aback.

‘I was thinking of Thursday at one o’clock,’ Jessie said.

‘How long will the meeting last?’ I asked, thinking ahead. ‘I’ll need to leave by two forty-five to collect Adrian and Beth from school.’ I’d also have to make arrangements to have Paula looked after, but that wasn’t Jessie’s worry, that was for me to sort out.

‘It’ll be about an hour, but best to have a contingency plan ready just in case.’

‘All right. Can you tell me what the meeting is about?’ I asked.

‘Beth,’ Jessie said.

Which I’d assumed. ‘Can you tell me when she can start phoning her father again? She knows I’m speaking to you today and is hoping you’ll be able to tell me.’

‘No. It’s something we’ll address at the meeting on Thursday.’

‘Oh, I see,’ I said. ‘Can I tell her why she’s not allowed to telephone her father?’

‘Is Beth asking?’

‘Yes.’

‘Tell her I’ll explain when I see her. I should be able to visit her some time next week. I’ll confirm a date and time when I see you on Thursday. Was there anything else?’

‘Err, no, I suppose not.’

‘I’ll see you on Thursday, then.’

I hadn’t learned anything new – apart from that I had to attend a meeting – and I was now even more confused (and worried), as I knew Beth would be. If there’s a problem, I’m a great believer in knowing what the issues are and dealing with them. It’s impossible to deal with what you don’t know. For me, ignorance is not bliss. It was Tuesday, and although the meeting on Thursday was only two days away, it stretched before me, an interminable distance to be got through before my questions could be answered and some of this would hopefully make sense.

When Beth came out of school that afternoon she ran up to me, her expression full of anticipation and hope. I didn’t wait for the question I knew would come.

‘I’ve spoken to Jessie,’ I said straight away. Beth’s eyes lit up. ‘We’re going to have to be patient. Jessie said to tell you she’d visit us next week and explain what is happening. In the meantime, we still can’t telephone the hospital, I’m afraid. Sorry, love.’

Tears immediately sprang to Beth’s eyes. ‘Why can’t I telephone my daddy?’ she said, utterly deflated.