Will You Love Me?: The story of my adopted daughter Lucy: Part 3 of 3

‘Not really,’ Jill said. ‘Because of all the upheaval and Lucy’s early life experiences, she struggled to begin with, but she’s settled down now. I’m sure Lucy will benefit from therapy when she goes to permanency, which should address her issues with eating as well.’

‘Are there plans for Lucy to have another medical?’ Peter now asked Stevie. ‘I remember the previous carer raised the same concerns as Cathy and took Lucy to her doctor.’ Peter had been the reviewing officer at previous reviews so was aware of Lucy’s history.

‘Lucy will have another medical before she goes to permanency,’ Stevie said. ‘If necessary, we can bring that forward, but I don’t think it’s necessary yet.’ She looked to Jill and me for confirmation and we nodded. Peter made a note.

Jill didn’t have anything further to say, so Peter asked Stevie for her report. She began by outlining the care plan: that the social services would apply for a Full Care Order and then Lucy would go to a suitable relative or a long-term foster placement.

Peter asked, ‘So how is the search going for a suitable relative? You were looking into that at the last review.’

‘I haven’t been able to trace Lucy’s father,’ Stevie said.

‘And he’s hardly a suitable relative,’ Peter put in. ‘He’s never featured in Lucy’s life. He hasn’t seen her since she was a baby, and as far as we know he’s not even in this country. Does his name appear on her birth certificate?’

‘No,’ Stevie said.

‘So I think we can rule him out,’ Peter said. ‘Unless he suddenly materializes and applies to look after Lucy, which is highly unlikely.’ Stevie nodded. ‘What about the other relatives?’ Peter now asked Stevie. ‘We need to get this moving so that Lucy is settled. She’s had enough uncertainty in her life. At the last review you were looking for two uncles, an aunt and a grandmother?’ Peter said, checking back in his notes. ‘Where are they?’

‘Lucy’s maternal grandmother lives in Scotland,’ Stevie said. ‘She has had her own problems and Bonnie is adamant that she doesn’t want Lucy to go and live with her. I agree; because of her lifestyle, it’s not an option. Bonnie doesn’t know where her brothers are – there’s been no contact for many years – and Lucy has never met them, so I’ve ruled them out too.’

‘And the aunt?’ Peter said, checking back in his paperwork. ‘This was the lady who gave Bonnie and Lucy a home when Lucy was a baby. We thought that sounded hopeful.’

Stevie shook her head. ‘I’ve spoken to Maggie on the phone. She’s a lovely lady, but she can’t offer Lucy a home as she is in poor health herself.’

‘So that leaves us with a long-term foster family for Lucy?’ Peter said.

‘Yes,’ Stevie confirmed. ‘The family-finding team are looking for a good match.’

‘Well, I hope they don’t take too long,’ Peter said quite forcefully. He finished writing and then said to Stevie: ‘Perhaps you could now tell us about the contact Lucy had with her mother last week?’

Stevie sighed. ‘It wasn’t good. The contact supervisor’s report shows that both Bonnie and Lucy found the meeting very difficult.’

‘How long was the contact?’ Peter asked.

‘One hour.’

He made a note, and Stevie continued: ‘Bonnie and Lucy didn’t engage with each other at all. They struggled to make conversation and weren’t able to communicate at any meaningful level. There were long, awkward silences and they were awkward with each other, and not at all tactile.’

‘You mean they didn’t hug or kiss each other?’ Peter asked.

‘That’s right. Not even when they met or said goodbye.’ Which of course I’d also noticed.

‘According to the supervisor’s report,’ Stevie continued, ‘Lucy suggested that they play some games together – draughts, dominoes and Scrabble – but Bonnie said she didn’t know how to play any of these games. Lucy offered to teach her and said that Cathy had been teaching her, but Bonnie said it was better she played them with Cathy, who knew how to play the games. In fact, Lucy talked a lot about Cathy and her family and the things they do together.’

‘Did Bonnie resent this?’ Peter asked.

‘Surprisingly, no,’ Stevie said. ‘In fact, Bonnie told Lucy she was pleased she was happy with Cathy. Cathy met Bonnie at the start and end of contact.’

‘How did that go?’ Peter asked, turning to me.

‘All right,’ I said. ‘I only met Bonnie for a couple of minutes, but she was polite to me.’

‘And how was Lucy after contact?’ Peter asked me.

‘Lucy wasn’t upset; she seemed to take it in her stride,’ I said. ‘I formed the impression that she hadn’t expected much more from her mother. Lucy told me that she didn’t expect to see her mother regularly and that her mother couldn’t help being the way she is, because she’d been abused as a child.’

‘How very sad,’ Peter said as he wrote. Then he looked at Stevie. ‘You were hoping to set up regular contact between Lucy and her mother; I take it that’s not going to happen now?’

‘No,’ Stevie said. ‘It’s not practical.’

‘Is Bonnie going to contest the case in court?’ Peter now asked Stevie.

‘No. Bonnie recognizes she can’t look after Lucy.’

‘It took her long enough,’ Peter commented dryly. ‘So, we’re just waiting for your family-finding team to come up with a good match for Lucy?’

‘Yes,’ Stevie confirmed.

Then turning to me, Peter said, ‘And while the social services are finding a suitable family for Lucy, she can stay with you?’

‘Oh, yes,’ I said. ‘For as long as it takes to find a family. The night she had contact, we were talking and she told me she would like to stay with us permanently. I’ve explained why that’s not possible.’

Peter looked at Stevie. ‘And as Lucy’s social worker you’ve explained all this to Lucy?’ he asked.

‘As much as I can,’ Stevie said. ‘Lucy won’t have anything to do with me at present.’

‘Well, someone needs to explain the recent developments to Lucy,’ Peter said. ‘That none of her extended family has come forward to look after her, so she’ll be going to a long-term foster family. I take it she’s too old to be adopted?’

‘Yes,’ Stevie said.

‘I think Lucy understands most of this already,’ I said. ‘But I can have another chat with her if you like and tell her, as she won’t see Stevie?’

‘Yes, please,’ Peter said. ‘It’s a pity Lucy didn’t feel able to join us for her review.’ I felt I was receiving a little smack on the legs. ‘And her Life Story Book?’ Peter now asked Stevie.

‘She should have it here,’ Stevie said to me.

‘It’s in a drawer in her bedroom,’ I said. ‘She’s very protective of it and hasn’t let any of us see it. I’m taking lots of photographs that can be added to it.’