A Daughter’s Choice

‘Now that was interesting,’ Ally remarked as we left the lecture room afterwards. ‘For the first time I really felt that I was being trained as a nurse and not just used as a skivvy.’

I felt just as she did, although it all seemed a little daunting. There was much more to nursing than I had imagined at the beginning.

‘There’s such a long way to go. But at least we’ve made a start. I’m going to read up all the information I can about the vital signs in the pamphlets they gave us. I know we shan’t be expected to deal with a crisis ourselves for years, but you never know when you might see something that ought to be reported to a senior nurse.’

Ally nodded, looking serious. ‘There was a death on our ward this morning. The dreadful thing is I’d been having a joke with him earlier. He had had both legs amputated but I thought he was getting over it. He was talking about getting false limbs and looking forward to going home – and then when I came back from the sluice room there was a crowd around his bed.’

She looked upset and I put an arm about her waist. ‘I’m sure they did all they could, Ally.’

‘Yes, they did what they could, but it was so sudden – a blood clot, apparently. Sister told me it often happens after a serious operation.’ She frowned. ‘Maybe if I’d known what to look for when I was talking to him earlier …?’

‘You can’t blame yourself. There were experienced nurses and doctors looking after him. If they weren’t aware of anything wrong, how could you be?’

‘Of course I couldn’t, but it’s sad, isn’t it?’

‘Yes, it’s very sad.’ I squeezed her waist. ‘Come on, let’s go and have a cup of tea to cheer ourselves up. You’ll never guess what I managed to buy in the village shop on Saturday morning – a packet of shortbread biscuits. If you promise to stop moping, I’ll share them with you.’

‘You’re a good friend, Kathy,’ she said, cheering up. ‘You were lucky. When I asked for biscuits they said they hadn’t got any.’

‘Well, it’s knowing how to ask,’ I said and grinned at her. ‘The old man who serves there calls me sweetheart. I think he fancies me a bit.’

‘He’s old enough to be your granddad,’ Ally said but she was laughing, her good humour restored.

‘You look lovely,’ Ally declared as I fidgeted with my dress for the umpteenth time while getting ready for my date with Tom O’Rourke. ‘Besides, I thought you said this was just a drink to talk about old times and not important?’

‘Of course it isn’t, but I want to look my best.’

‘You always look good,’ Ally said. ‘You’ve got the perfect English rose complexion and your hair is a lovely colour. You can see it’s natural and not dyed.’

‘Yes, I’m lucky with my hair.’ I gave it a little pat. ‘I never have to do much with it. After a wash it just waves naturally.’

‘Well, don’t gloat. Just because you’re going out with the best-looking fellow in the place.’

She was grinning at me but I caught a faint note of envy in her voice. Ally had already been out with three different men since our arrival, but moaned that she hadn’t really enjoyed herself with any of them.

‘Don’t worry,’ I told her. ‘You’ll find someone you like soon.’

‘I’m not sure …’ She bit her lip anxiously. ‘It’s daft, but I can’t help thinking about Mike the whole time. He usually writes as soon as he gets back to his base, but he hasn’t this time. I’m worried about him, Kathy. Supposing he’s been hurt – or killed?’

‘Perhaps he’s just been too busy to write,’ I suggested. ‘If there was bad news someone would let you know.’

‘Yes, I expect you’re right. I’m being silly.’ She pulled a face. ‘Go on then, you lucky thing. Go and meet Dr O’Rourke. And stop looking so nervous!’

‘I’ll try.’ I gave her a quick hug. ‘You try to stop worrying about Mike.’

She grinned and shook her head as I left. I went downstairs and saw Tom O’Rourke standing just outside the front door. It was a pleasant summer evening and he was wearing beige slacks, a brown shirt, a deep fawn sweater slung over his shoulder. I thought he looked like a star from the movies and my heart did a rapid somersault.

‘Kathy,’ he murmured, his eyes going over me with approval. ‘You look … very nice. That colour blue suits you.’

I was wearing a simple blue dress with a tucked bodice, short sleeves and a white collar. It was good to get out of uniform for a while, but I knew the dress was a bit girlish. I’d had it new just before I left home and the style wasn’t what I would have chosen for myself, but I hadn’t been able to get myself anything new yet. Ally had spoken of us spending our first leave together at her home, and I intended to buy some more suitable clothes, but that wouldn’t be for ages.

‘I thought we would walk to the village.’ Something flickered in Tom’s eyes as they went over me. ‘You hardly look old enough to drink in the pub, Kathy.’

‘It’s just this dress. Gran bought it for me. It’s too childish but it’s my best.’

He nodded and smiled. ‘Very pretty. You look older in your uniform.’

I bit my lip as I sensed a withdrawal in him and realized he wasn’t pleased by the way I looked. Perhaps I should have worn my hair up instead of letting it hang loose? It was too late now. I should just have to hope my youthful appearance hadn’t put him off completely.

‘Have you written to Mrs Cole yet?’ he asked as we began to walk in the direction of the village. ‘Bridget told me that she was worried because she hadn’t heard.’

There was a note of reprimand in his voice that touched a nerve. Did he imagine I was an irresponsible child? The evening I’d been anticipating so eagerly had suddenly become disappointing. He had said it was just a drink to talk about people we both knew but I had expected more than this somehow. I’d thought there was something between us. Now he seemed to have become the grand doctor figure being kind to a new recruit.

That was exactly what I was, of course, but I’d hoped for a very different outcome to the evening. We spent half an hour talking about people in the lanes, and then progressed to the hospital. He became passionate then and I glimpsed a man I could admire as he spoke about his work and hopes.

By nine o’clock he had me back outside the Dower House.

‘It was a pleasant evening, Kathy,’ he said offering me his hand. We shook hands as if we were polite strangers. ‘We must do it again one day.’

‘Yes. Thank you, Dr O’Rourke.’

He frowned, hesitated as though wanting to say more, then turned and walked off in the direction of the hospital. So that was that then! My heart flopped all the way to my boots as I stood watching him. He simply wasn’t interested in me as a woman. In fact he thought of me as a child.

Ally looked surprised when I walked in.

‘You’re back early? I thought you would be ages yet.’

‘I told you – it was just a friendly gesture. I’m a kid he used to see in the lane years ago.’

‘It’s that dress,’ Ally said. ‘It’s too young for you. I would’ve lent you something but mine wouldn’t fit.’

‘I don’t suppose it would have made any difference. He remembers me as a kid from down the lane and always will.’

‘Well, there’s plenty more fish in the sea. Sally says there’s a dance on next Saturday in the village hall. We’ll see if we can borrow a dress for you and we’ll all go.’

Ally’s attitude was the right one, of course. She seemed to have got over her personal worries for the time being, but I was still smarting from my disappointment that evening.

Eleanor Ross came up trumps over the dress. She was on duty that evening and gave me a choice of three, because, as she said, she wouldn’t be needing them herself.

‘I brought far too much with me,’ she told me with a wry look. ‘But maybe these will come in useful after all. Try them all on and see which one suits you best, Kathy.’

‘May I really?’

‘Yes, of course. I never say what I don’t mean. The green silk is lovely on, but the yellow brocade might suit you better. I’m not sure about the black.’

The black dress was fabulous, very slinky and cut close to the body. It had tiny shoulder straps, the bodice heavily beaded with jet. I knew at once that it suited me, but it was very sophisticated and so obviously expensive that I was afraid to choose it.

I finally settled on the green silk. It was a simple dress cut low on the shoulders with tiny puffed sleeves and a full skirt that just flirted above my ankles. No doubt it had cost almost as much as the black dress, but I sensed that Eleanor was pleased I hadn’t chosen her favourite.