The Texas Rancher's Family

Her throat aching with the effort it took to hold back a sob, she swung away from the window.

Mac was staring at her, his handsome face creased with concern. “What’s wrong?”

Wishing he could pull her into his arms and comfort her—the way he’d comforted his daughter when she’d been upset—Erin rushed back through the house. Mac was right behind her.

The logical side of her knew he deserved an explanation. This was the second time she’d reacted emotionally, in just a few hours. Because she couldn’t let go of the past.

She lifted a palm. “It’s nothing.”

“The hell it is,” he countered gruffly, refusing to let her cut and run.

Feeling her body heat under his probing gaze, she tried again. “I just...I didn’t expect—” Her voice broke, and she swallowed. He wasn’t going to give up until he knew, so she shook her head, forced herself to go on. “Angelica...”

“Who’s Angelica?” he asked gently.

Hot, bitter tears pushed at the back of her eyes. Her throat ached so badly she could barely speak. “My daughter. She died two years ago, when she was six.” Erin grabbed hold of the kitchen counter and shut her eyes. She could feel Mac next to her, hovering, patiently waiting for her to confide in him.

He moved closer, and Erin felt a wave of comforting strength emanating from him. Eventually she choked out, “That was Angelica’s bike that Heather is riding.”

“Would you like me to ask her to stop?” Mac’s voice sounded a little raspy, too.

Swallowing hard, Erin opened her eyes and turned toward him. “No, of course not. Not when they’re all having such a good time. In fact, I haven’t seen my boys look so happy in a long time. Not since they had a little sister to play with.”

Mac took a look at the photos strewn across the top of the kitchen hutch. One of a much younger Erin, and her brothers and sisters, standing with their parents. Another of Erin and her husband, surrounded by their three kids. The photos of Erin’s daughter caught his attention, too. Mac paused in shock. “Our daughters look so much alike,” he murmured.

Erin nodded, her heart constricting again. Heather and Angelica might have been sisters. The two little girls had the same thick, curly blond hair and piquant faces, the same exuberance and zest for life. The only difference being that Erin’s child was dead now, while Mac’s was still very much alive.

Erin couldn’t help but envy him that.

He took her hand and led her into the family room. Too overwrought to protest, she followed numbly. “What happened?” He guided her to the sofa and sank down beside her.

Erin made no protest when he slung a comforting arm around her shoulders. She didn’t often talk about this, but knew she needed to tonight. With him. She turned and looked into Mac’s eyes, still stunned about the unexpectedness of it all. “She had cancer.”

He tightened his grip on her. His eyes were steady. Calm. And so filled with tenderness and compassion, she wanted to weep. “How long was she sick?” he asked quietly.

Erin swallowed again. “Ten months.” Ten hellishly long, yet way-too-short months.

“How did you find out?”

Determined not to lose it again, she slid a shaking hand over her thigh. “The bike Heather’s riding...” Mac’s brow furrowed and Erin forced herself to continue, “Angelica learned to ride when she was four. It only took her a couple of weeks to master it without the training wheels, and she was so proud of herself. So happy to be out riding around the driveway with her big brothers. Then one day, when she was five and a half—” Erin’s voice broke at the memory of that last “completely normal” day “—she fell off for no reason anyone could see, and scraped up her hands and knees.”

Mac grimaced in sympathy as the memories engulfed Erin.

“That night she started complaining about her head hurting. Even though she’d been wearing a helmet, I was scared. I thought she might have hurt something in the fall, so I took her to the E.R. and had her checked out just to be sure.”

The sorrow Erin felt, then and now, was mirrored in Mac’s eyes. “And that’s when they found the tumor that was affecting the ‘balance’ area of her brain,” she concluded brokenly.

Mac drew her closer, until she was pressed against his side. His irises darkened. “You must have been terrified.”

Erin had been. Knowing she needed to continue unburdening herself, as much as he needed to listen, she leaned into his comforting warmth. “My husband and I took Angelica to MD Anderson in Houston. They did surgery and chemotherapy and radiation. She lost all her beautiful hair.” And had cried and cried and cried, until she decided she liked being bald, anyway. “For a while, we thought she was going to be okay.” Erin released a shuddering sigh, beginning to feel her heart go numb again at the memory. “But then the tumor came back...and Angelica died about three months after that.”

“I’m so sorry.” Mac embraced her. For a moment, Erin let herself be held against the solid warmth of his chest.

Aware she could get a little too used to that, she drew away. Exhaled again.

Mac let her go. He looked at her left hand, taking in the absence of a ring. “What happened to your husband?”

Needing some space, after confiding so much, Erin stood and began to roam the room. In a choked voice, she admitted, “The same thing that happens to a lot of parents who have terminally-ill kids.” She pushed away the hurt and disappointment that lingered. “G.W. discovered he couldn’t handle the loss. And he left.”

Mac had the same incredulous, disapproving reaction as most of their family and friends. “You’re divorced.”

It was more a statement than a question.

She nodded. “For over a year.”

He looked as if he wanted to punch something. “Where is he now?”

“All over the place. He’s a geologist. He works as a scout for an oil company.”

“Does he have contact with your sons?” Mac asked.

“Once every month or so he’ll call or come by, usually without warning.” She shrugged. “He sends child-support checks, though. I suppose we ought to be grateful for that.”

Mac pondered that. “How do your kids feel?”

Bitterness welled in her heart. It was one thing to be abandoned herself, another to watch her kids suffer through it. “How do you think? First they lose their sister. Then their dad leaves, too.”

As Mac watched her in silence, guilt washed over her. It wasn’t as if any of this were his fault. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to be so short with you.”

“Hey.” His lips quirked ruefully. “I’m the one who should be apologizing, for asking such an intrusive question. It’s just...Sammy and Stevie are such great kids, and it’s hard to imagine anyone walking away from them.”

Erin felt the same.

Silence fell once again.

She peered at Mac through narrowed lashes, studying him curiously. “What about you? You’re here with your daughter, no wife in tow.”

“Cassandra died of a pulmonary embolism two and a half years ago,” he said gruffly.

“I’m sorry.”

He nodded, accepting her condolences.

Erin resisted the urge to comfort him with a touch, a hug, relying instead on a heartfelt look. “Is Heather still having a rough time?”

“She was so young, she doesn’t remember a lot about her mother. But she misses her best friend, whose family used to take care of her when I was on the road.”

Erin focused on the past tense. “Used to?”