‘The fee,’ said Steerforth, ‘is – ’
‘Five bob,’ replied Miss Mowcher, ‘and dirt cheap, my chicken. Ain’t I volatile, Mr. Copperfield?’
I replied politely: ‘Not at all.’ But I thought she was rather so, when she tossed up his two half-crowns like a goblin pieman, caught them, dropped them in her pocket, and gave it a loud slap.
‘That’s the Till!’ observed Miss Mowcher, standing at the chair again, and replacing in the bag a miscellaneous collection of little objects she had emptied out of it. ‘Have I got all my traps? It seems so. It won’t do to be like long Ned Beadwood, when they took him to church “to marry him to somebody”, as he says, and left the bride behind. Ha! ha! ha! A wicked rascal, Ned, but droll! Now, I know I’m going to break your hearts, but I am forced to leave you. You must call up all your fortitude, and try to bear it. Good-bye, Mr. Copperfield! Take care of yourself, jockey of Norfolk! How I have been rattling on! It’s all the fault of you two wretches. I forgive you! “Bob swore!” – as the Englishman said for “Good night”, when he first learnt French, and thought it so like English. “Bob swore,” my ducks!’
With the bag slung over her arm, and rattling as she waddled away, she waddled to the door, where she stopped to inquire if she should leave us a lock of her hair. ‘Ain’t I volatile?’ she added, as a commentary on this offer, and, with her finger on her nose, departed.
Steerforth laughed to that degree, that it was impossible for me to help laughing too; though I am not sure I should have done so, but for this inducement. When we had had our laugh quite out, which was after some time, he told me that Miss Mowcher had quite an extensive connexion, and made herself useful to a variety of people in a variety of ways. Some people trifled with her as a mere oddity, he said; but she was as shrewdly and sharply observant as anyone he knew, and as long-headed as she was short-armed. He told me that what she had said of being here, and there, and everywhere, was true enough; for she made little darts into the provinces, and seemed to pick up customers everywhere, and to know everybody. I asked him what her disposition was: whether it was at all mischievous, and if her sympathies were generally on the right side of things: but, not succeeding in attracting his attention to these questions after two or three attempts, I forbore or forgot to repeat them. He told me instead, with much rapidity, a good deal about her skill, and her profits; and about her being a scientific cupper, if I should ever have occasion for her service in that capacity.
She was the principal theme of our conversation during the evening: and when we parted for the night Steerforth called after me over the banisters, ‘Bob swore!’ as I went downstairs.
I was surprised, when I came to Mr. Barkis’s house, to find Ham walking up and down in front of it, and still more surprised to learn from him that little Em’ly was inside. I naturally inquired why he was not there too, instead of pacing the streets by himself?
‘Why, you see, Mas’r Davy,’ he rejoined, in a hesitating manner, ‘Em’ly, she’s talking to some ‘un in here.’
‘I should have thought,’ said I, smiling, ‘that that was a reason for your being in here too, Ham.’
‘Well, Mas’r Davy, in a general way, so ‘t would be,’ he returned; ‘but look’ee here, Mas’r Davy,’ lowering his voice, and speaking very gravely. ‘It’s a young woman, sir – a young woman, that Em’ly knowed once, and doen’t ought to know no more.’
When I heard these words, a light began to fall upon the figure I had seen following them, some hours ago.
‘It’s a poor wurem, Mas’r Davy,’ said Ham, ‘as is trod under foot by all the town. Up street and down street. The mowld o’ the churchyard don’t hold any that the folk shrink away from, more.’
‘Did I see her tonight, Ham, on the sand, after we met you?’
‘Keeping us in sight?’ said Ham. ‘It’s like you did, Mas’r Davy. Not that I know’d then, she was theer, sir, but along of her creeping soon arterwards under Em’ly’s little winder, when she see the light come, and whispering “Em’ly, Em’ly, for Christ’s sake, have a woman’s heart towards me. I was once like you!” Those was solemn words, Mas’r Davy, fur to hear!’
‘They were indeed, Ham. What did Em’ly do?’ ‘Says Em’ly, “Martha, is it you? Oh, Martha, can it be you?” – for they had sat at work together, many a day, at Mr. Omer’s.’
‘I recollect her now!’ cried I, recalling one of the two girls I had seen when I first went there. ‘I recollect her quite well!’
‘Martha Endell,’ said Ham. ‘Two or three year older than Em’ly, but was at the school with her.’
‘I never heard her name,’ said I. ‘I didn’t mean to interrupt you.’
‘For the matter o’ that, Mas’r Davy,’ replied Ham, ‘all’s told a’most in them words, “Em’ly, Em’ly, for Christ’s sake, have a woman’s heart towards me. I was once like you!” She wanted to speak to Em’ly. Em’ly couldn’t speak to her theer, for her loving uncle was come home, and he wouldn’t – no, Mas’r Davy,’ said Ham, with great earnestness, ‘he couldn’t, kind-natur’d, tender-hearted as he is, see them two together, side by side, for all the treasures that’s wrecked in the sea.’
I felt how true this was. I knew it, on the instant, quite as well as Ham.
‘So Em’ly writes in pencil on a bit of paper,’ he pursued, ‘and gives it to her out o’ winder to bring here. “Show that,” she says, “to my aunt, Mrs. Barkis, and she’ll set you down by her fire, for the love of me, till uncle is gone out, and I can come.” By and by she tells me what I tell you, Mas’r Davy, and asks me to bring her. What can I do? She doen’t ought to know any such, but I can’t deny her, when the tears is on her face.’
He put his hand into the breast of his shaggy jacket, and took out with great care a pretty little purse.
‘And if I could deny her when the tears was on her face, Mas’r Davy,’ said Ham, tenderly adjusting it on the rough palm of his hand, ‘how could I deny her when she give me this to carry for her – knowing what she brought it for? Such a toy as it is!’ said Ham, thoughtfully looking on it. ‘With such a little money in it, Em’ly my dear.’
I shook him warmly by the hand when he had put it away again – for that was more satisfactory to me than saying anything – and we walked up and down, for a minute or two, in silence. The door opened then, and Peggotty appeared, beckoning to Ham to come in. I would have kept away, but she came after me, entreating me to come in too. Even then, I would have avoided the room where they all were, but for its being the neat-tiled kitchen I have mentioned more than once. The door opening immediately into it, I found myself among them before I considered whither I was going.
The girl – the same I had seen upon the sands – was near the fire. She was sitting on the ground, with her head and one arm lying on a chair. I fancied, from the disposition of her figure, that Em’ly had but newly risen from the chair, and that the forlorn head might perhaps have been lying on her lap. I saw but little of the girl’s face, over which her hair fell loose and scattered, as if she had been disordering it with her own hands; but I saw that she was young, and of a fair complexion. Peggotty had been crying. So had little Em’ly. Not a word was spoken when we first went in; and the Dutch clock by the dresser seemed, in the silence, to tick twice as loud as usual. Em’ly spoke first.
‘Martha wants,’ she said to Ham, ‘to go to London.’
‘Why to London?’ returned Ham.
He stood between them, looking on the prostrate girl with a mixture of compassion for her, and of jealousy of her holding any companionship with her whom he loved so well, which I have always remembered distinctly. They both spoke as if she were ill; in a soft, suppressed tone that was plainly heard, although it hardly rose above a whisper.
‘Better there than here,’ said a third voice aloud – Martha’s, though she did not move. ‘No one knows me there. Everybody knows me here.’
‘What will she do there?’ inquired Ham.
She lifted up her head, and looked darkly round at him for a moment; then laid it down again, and curved her right arm about her neck, as a woman in a fever, or in an agony of pain from a shot, might twist herself.
‘She will try to do well,’ said little Em’ly. ‘You don’t know what she has said to us. Does he – do they – aunt?’
Peggotty shook her head compassionately.
‘I’ll try,’ said Martha, ‘if you’ll help me away. I never can do worse than I have done here. I may do better. Oh!’ with a dreadful shiver, ‘take me out of these streets, where the whole town knows me from a child!’
As Em’ly held out her hand to Ham, I saw him put in it a little canvas bag. She took it, as if she thought it were her purse, and made a step or two forward; but finding her mistake, came back to where he had retired near me, and showed it to him.
‘It’s all yourn, Em’ly,’ I could hear him say. ‘I haven’t nowt in all the wureld that ain’t yourn, my dear. It ain’t of no delight to me, except for you!’
The tears rose freshly in her eyes, but she turned away and went to Martha. What she gave her, I don’t know. I saw her stooping over her, and putting money in her bosom. She whispered something, as she asked was that enough? ‘More than enough,’ the other said, and took her hand and kissed it.
Then Martha arose, and gathering her shawl about her, covering her face with it, and weeping aloud, went slowly to the door. She stopped a moment before going out, as if she would have uttered something or turned back; but no word passed her lips. Making the same low, dreary, wretched moaning in her shawl, she went away.
As the door closed, little Em’ly looked at us three in a hurried manner and then hid her face in her hands, and fell to sobbing.
‘Doen’t, Em’ly!’ said Ham, tapping her gently on the shoulder. ‘Doen’t, my dear! You doen’t ought to cry so, pretty!’
‘Oh, Ham!’ she exclaimed, still weeping pitifully, ‘I am not so good a girl as I ought to be! I know I have not the thankful heart, sometimes, I ought to have!’
‘Yes, yes, you have, I’m sure,’ said Ham.
‘No! no! no!’ cried little Em’ly, sobbing, and shaking her head. ‘I am not as good a girl as I ought to be. Not near! not near!’ And still she cried, as if her heart would break.
‘I try your love too much. I know I do!’ she sobbed. ‘I’m often cross to you, and changeable with you, when I ought to be far different. You are never so to me. Why am I ever so to you, when I should think of nothing but how to be grateful, and to make you happy!’
‘You always make me so,’ said Ham, ‘my dear! I am happy in the sight of you. I am happy, all day long, in the thoughts of you.’
‘Ah! that’s not enough!’ she cried. ‘That is because you are good; not because I am! Oh, my dear, it might have been a better fortune for you, if you had been fond of someone else – of someone steadier and much worthier than me, who was all bound up in you, and never vain and changeable like me!’
‘Poor little tender-heart,’ said Ham, in a low voice. ‘Martha has overset her, altogether.’
‘Please, aunt,’ sobbed Em’ly, ‘come here, and let me lay my head upon you. Oh, I am very miserable tonight, aunt! Oh, I am not as good a girl as I ought to be. I am not, I know!’
Peggotty had hastened to the chair before the fire. Em’ly, with her arms around her neck, kneeled by her, looking up most earnestly into her face.