I Do? I Don't?

From that day onward their lives had become entwined. Niki was the little sister he’d never had. Now he couldn’t help but feel guilty, as though there were something illicit in the fact he was noticing her as a beautiful, sexy woman.

“How’s the new job?” she asked, drawing him out of his pensive mood.

“The job’s fine,” he said, wincing at the strained sound of his voice. “It’s keeping me busy.”

“So I’ve heard.”

He moaned. “Now, don’t you start lecturing me, too.”

For the first time that evening, she laughed as she settled herself in the white wicker love seat. He watched as she kicked off her pumps and tucked her long legs beneath her. She looked relaxed, comfortable and—yes, dammit—irresistible. “I wouldn’t think of it. I know better than to try to give advice to anyone. Besides, I’ve got enough to think about on my own.”

He resisted the urge to join her on the love seat. Instead, he leaned a shoulder against one of the ornately decorated poles, deciding it best to keep a safe distance between him and Niki. Roses vined upward over the trellised porch, teasing the air with their sweet scent. A gentle breeze felt soft and warm, as though fall were just a distant promise. For a moment he wished they were kids again. That they were young and carefree, without the encumbrances of adulthood.

But he wasn’t a kid. Neither was Niki, as he was shocked to learn. They had an adult-size problem to deal with and the sooner he brought it up, the better.

He cleared his throat. “Niki, the last thing I want to do is to be a wet blanket and give you a lecture…but I feel I’ve got to say this.” He took a deep breath, then blurted out, “What’s all this nonsense about you marrying Greg Lawton?”

“Nonsense?” The smile faded. A frown marred her beautiful face. “What do you mean, ‘nonsense’?”

“I mean, this whole idea—your marrying Greg—it’s crazy.”

“Crazy?” The single word echoed across the gazebo, like a warning shot fired across an open field. She stared at him. Even in the muted light of the moon, he saw the agitation sparkling in her green eyes. Her shoulders were tensed and ready for an argument. “Now look, Jack. Just because you don’t like Greg—”

“My personal feelings toward Greg Lawton have nothing to do with this,” he lied.

“Ha! You’ve never liked Greg. As a matter of fact, you’ve never liked any man I’ve ever dated.”

“That’s not true.” He searched his mind for someone, anyone to support his denial. “What about that guy who used to hang around here all the time during your senior year in high school? You know the one—tall kid, glasses, on the thin side?”

“Martin Skinner?” she asked, giving a disgusted look. “I never dated Martin. He was my lab partner in chemistry. He was tutoring me. If it wasn’t for him, I’d never have gotten through the class.”

“He seemed nice enough to me.” Jack shrugged. “So what was wrong with good ol’ Martin?”

She shifted uncomfortably in her chair. “Nothing…that is, if you wanted to date a nerd.”

Which was probably why he’d trusted him so much, Jack acknowledged silently. No wonder it hadn’t bothered him to see the gangly kid hanging around the Adamses’ house. Martin Skinner couldn’t have hurt a flea, much less been a threat to Niki’s well-being.

Jack pushed the troubling thought from his mind. He had more important things to consider than the pros and cons of dating Martin Skinner…things like Niki’s future. “Niki, all I’m trying to say is that you should slow down, give yourself time to get to know Greg before you start considering something as important as marriage.”

“I do know Greg. I’ve known him almost as long as I’ve known you,” she stated, an edge to her deceptively calm voice. He had no doubt Niki’s temper was on a short fuse. “We’ve been dating for over six months.”

Six months? Jack felt stunned. Even to his own ears, six months sounded like a long time. Had he really let that much time pass without knowing what was happening in her life?

He ignored the tiny fists of guilt jabbing away at his conscience. “Okay, so you think you know Greg. But you’re still young. You’ve got your whole life ahead of you. What’s your rush? Why tie yourself down to marriage?”

“You’re wrong, Jack. The one thing I do know is that life’s too short,” she said. Her smile was bittersweet. “My father’s death taught me that much.”

“Niki, I—”

He stared at her, uncertain what to say. He wanted to disagree with her. But in his heart, he knew she was right. Her father’s fatal heart attack at the age of fifty-eight had been a shock to everyone, including Jack.

At the mention of her father’s death, he found himself wrestling with his own personal demons of guilt. It was just one more reminder that he’d been remiss. That he hadn’t been there at a time when she needed him most.

Niki continued, drawing him out of his guilty musings, “My mother thought she and Dad had a lifetime to share. Only sometimes a lifetime isn’t all it’s cracked up to be. Time is too precious. I’m not going to waste a moment of it watching life pass me by.” Softly, she added, “I want a family, Jack. A home of my own before it’s too late.”

His chest tightened at the tremulous sound of her voice, making it hard to breathe. They’d been friends for too long. He felt her pain as though it were his own.

But just because he understood her hurry to be wed, it didn’t mean he condoned her reasoning. If anything, it made him all the more certain she was making a mistake. A mistake she might spend the rest of her life regretting.

“And you’re sure Greg Lawton is the man you want to spend the rest of your life with?”

She hesitated. “Greg’s the man who’s asked me.”

He released a frustrated breath. “That’s not love, Niki. That’s desperation.”

“Since when are you such an expert on love, Jack?” Emotion flashed in her eyes. “I don’t see you taking any steps toward the altar. If you ask me, I’d say you’re the last person who should be giving me marital advice.”

“Somebody has to give you advice, Niki,” he hollered, as an irrational anger welled up inside him. “It’s obvious you’re not capable of making a rational decision on your own.”

Jack regretted the words almost as soon as he spoke them. The last thing he’d intended was to lose his temper. He was in big trouble now.

She didn’t answer. In fact, she didn’t even look at him. Her seemingly quiet acceptance of his angry outburst unnerved him more than if she’d stood up and spit in his eye. Niki never did anything quietly.

She untucked her legs, slid her feet back into the discarded pumps, then stood. Pulling herself to her full fivefoot-seven height, she faced him. “I want to thank you, Jack.”

“Thank me?” He winced as his voice broke. He swallowed hard. His throat felt dry, as though it were about to close up on him.

“Yes, I’m very grateful to you.” She crossed her arms at her waist and hugged herself tightly. Emotion—anger mixed with pain?—glimmered in her eyes. “You’ve cleared up a lot of my doubts.”

“I have?”

“Yes, you have,” she said, chuckling softly as though remembering a private joke. The hollow-sounding laughter left him feeling cold inside. “You’ve opened my eyes to a lot of things. Things that should have been obvious years ago.”

Jack frowned, his discomfort growing. He didn’t understand what was going on here. But he had no doubt she was talking about more than his giving a little friendly advice. “Niki—”

She held up a quieting hand. “Let me finish. I want you to understand something, Jack. I am not a child. I am a clear-thinking, rational woman who is more than capable of making life’s important decisions.”

“Niki, listen. I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to imply you were immature—”

“Of course, you did,” she snapped, her temper finally kicking in. “You’ve been implying it since you walked onto this gazebo.”

He couldn’t help himself. He pointed a finger at her nose. “You know, Niki, losing your temper isn’t a sign of maturity. It’s just one more example to support of my theory that you aren’t ready for marriage.”

She growled her frustration. “Get this through your thick head, Jack. Butt out of my life. I’m not the little kid who used to follow you around. I’ve got a life of my own. A life that doesn’t involve you anymore.”

The words had a stinging affect. The thought of her not needing him hurt more than any physical blow possibly could.

“You don’t mean, that,” he said slowly.