Lovers' Lies

‘Hmm.’ He leaned back in his chair, his eyes speculative as they rested on her. The waiter brought the wine list and Joshua took it and murmured thanks without shifting his gaze from Felicia. ‘I hope you’ll share a bottle of wine with me, all the same,’ he said. ‘My treat. Or do you only drink mineral water?’

She was surprised he’d noticed what she was drinking earlier. She’d thought Suzette had been claiming most of his attention. ‘I drink wine,’ she said, ‘sometimes.’ This afternoon she’d felt slightly dehydrated and cool water was the most sensible thing to drink. But a glass of wine with her meal was a decidedly pleasant prospect. The fact that Joshua’s very presence across the table was causing her skin to prickle with antagonism was beside the point.

‘What would you like? White or red?’

‘White—if that’s OK with you.’

He flashed her a smile. ‘Fine. Medium or dry?’

‘Usually I prefer dry, but I’d like to sample something local.’

‘Good. We have something in common after all. Now, let’s see...’

He drew her into the choosing process, making it a discussion, and they settled on a bottle of Huadong Chardonnay. When the waiter offered a menu both opted for the buffet. ‘Miss Stevens would like a separate check,’ Joshua added without a blink.

The buffet was laden with such a variety that Felicia found herself eating more than she had meant to, supplementing delicious Chinese dishes with a small bowl of fluffy white rice and a crisp salad.

And of course it was impossible not to talk. Joshua asked where she lived, what she did. ‘Auckland,’ she said. ‘I’m a partner in a boutique-style shop specialising in bedroom and bathroom furnishings and accessories.’

She kept her voice crisp and emotionless, with no hint of defensiveness. Some men made suggestive remarks when she told them what her business was about, but Joshua just nodded interestedly and asked questions about her target market, type of stock, and supplier base.

‘I’ve been to a trade fair here,’ he said, ‘hoping to open doors for the agricultural machinery my company makes. We’ve been using a middleman in Hong Kong, but I wanted to see something of the country for myself and follow up a few contacts.’

‘Your company? You own it?’ She tried to keep the surprise from her voice, make it a casual query.

“That’s right.

She schooled her face to indifference and bit her tongue on the questions hovering at its tip—how, since when, where had a young handyman with a lawn-mowing round acquired an international business? She said, “There are special tours for business groups.

‘None of them were quite what I wanted, and this one seems a good introduction to the country. Being an independent traveller can be pretty frustrating when you don’t know the language and have limited time.’

They talked for a while of what they’d seen that day, and swapped random knowledge of Chinese history and culture.

‘I’ve read a couple of books,’ Joshua said, ‘but the more I learn, the more I know there is to learn.’

Felicia smiled, surprising herself. The food and wine must have had a mellowing effect. ‘It’s a huge country, with a long, long history. I started reading about it months ago, but it would take a lifetime to learn it all.’

A flare of warmth and masculine interest in his eyes as he returned the smile told her that he wasn’t unaware of her as a female. From Joshua Tagget she found that faintly shocking, and had to remind herself that not only was she a grown woman now, he had no idea who she was, no memory of the teenage girl he had once known. But it was startling to find her cheeks heating slightly under the veiled curiosity in his gaze, and a disturbing sexual reaction to him tingling along her veins.

They skipped dessert, and Felicia declined coffee, instead asking for her bill.

‘And mine,’ Joshua said. As the waiter went to get them he turned to Felicia. ‘Do you have plans for the rest of the evening?’

‘I... was thinking of walking a bit before I turn in.’

‘I wouldn’t mind walking off that meal. A lone woman shouldn’t wander round on her own at night,’ Joshua said.

‘I believe China is pretty safe, actually.’

‘Maybe, but you’d be even safer with me.’

Something must have quivered in her expression. He queried, ‘You don’t believe that?’

‘You think I should take your word for it?’

He turned up his palms in a gesture of defeat. ‘You want references?’

‘Do you have any on you?’

Joshua grinned. ‘As a matter of fact I have a couple of quite impressive letters of introduction—they came in useful at the trade fair—but I’ve left them in my room.’

The waiter brought the bills and laid them on the table. Felicia signed her name and room number and picked up her bag.

As she stood up, Joshua followed. ‘So,’ he said, ‘do I have to go and fetch my references?’

‘Of course not.’

Felicia was pretty sure that if she went off by herself he would follow her anyway. Discreetly, perhaps at a distance, but—ironically—he was the sort of man who couldn’t knowingly let a woman walk alone down dark streets in a strange city.

The air was warm and heavy. The shops and street stalls had closed up but there were still people sitting on low stools outside their homes, playing cards or chess. Passing under an overhanging tree that cast a deep shadow on the pavement, Felicia stumbled a little on an uneven flagstone and Joshua took her arm to steady her.

‘OK?’ he said.

‘Yes.’ She pulled away slightly and he released his hold. Felicia hoped he hadn’t discerned the small shiver that his brief grip on her arm had evoked.

A black-clad elderly woman approached accompanied by a boy of about twelve years old, already taller than she was. ‘Hello,’ the young boy said. ‘How are you?’ The old woman smiled proudly as Felicia and Joshua returned the greeting. Cooking smells wafted onto the street from a rattling air-conditioning unit set in a nearby wall. The city had a hot, heavy, alien aroma. The weight of centuries and the burden of a teeming population seemed to scent the very air.

They skirted a high corrugated iron fence with silent cranes inside it towering against the fading sky. The pavement was strewn with heaps of dirt and broken bits of wood and plaster.

‘Rebuilding,’ Joshua said, pausing briefly to peer through a peephole in the fence. ‘Whatever it is, it’s going to be big.’ He straightened and came back to her side.

‘I wonder how the others are enjoying their dinner,’ she said, making a random effort at conversation to divert her own attention from her stupid sensitivity to his nearness.

‘Sorry you didn’t join them?’ he asked.

‘No, of course not.’ Her denial was probably too quick, too emphatic. ‘The hotel food is very good—don’t you agree?’

‘Very,’ he assented gravely. Obviously he didn’t think much of her conversational powers. He wasn’t alone in that. Apart from anything else, now that she was sure he had no notion who she was it seemed simplest to keep things that way. She had no desire to discuss the past with Joshua Tagget, and ruin her holiday.

They reached the corner and Joshua said, ‘Round the block?’

‘Yes, OK.’

They walked in silence for a while. Felicia wondered if Joshua was wishing he’d joined the others. Suzette would miss him. ‘I’m not very good company,’ she said, despising herself for making excuses to him. But the silence had become too fraught for her, loaded with old memories and the new, unsettling reactions she was experiencing, too strong to ignore but too contradictory and perilous to make sense of.

‘Why do you say that?’

‘I’m too...tired to make conversation.’