The Cowboy And The Countess

“Do tell?” Ronnie’s eyebrows did a Groucho Marx dance.

“It would’ve been easier to ride one of them.”

“Bareback?”

“The ‘puppies’ caught sight of a stray Siamese nosing around the garbage cans out back of Phil’s Fine Fish Fry, and…” Anna looked down at her oversize fuchsia T-shirt and favorite striped bike shorts. They were flecked with moist green bits she prayed were relish. A glob of white creamy stuff clung to the hem of her shirt. Please let that be mayonnaise, she prayed, staring at the shivering form.

“Go no further. We get the picture….” Ronnie eyed her. “In glorious detail. Now go upstairs and take a shower in tomato juice or something. We’re the Clean Queens, not the Grunge Girls. Any minute now, someone is going to walk through that door, and what’s the first thing he sees? You prancing around the place, smelling like last Friday’s flounder special.”

The phone rang. Ronnie whooped. “Business is booming!” She waved her hand once more, dismissing Anna, then picked up the phone. “Clean Queens. We’ll give your castle the royal treatment, and you won’t have to ransom the family jewels to pay for it.”

“She loves saying that, doesn’t she?” Anna said to her mother as she crossed the reception area. To the left was another room with a folding table, metal chairs and easel. Anna would be training several new girls in there this morning while her mother interviewed other applicants in the opposite office. It looked as if Clean Queens would survive its first month of operation.

“Are you sure you’re all right, sweetheart?” her mother asked.

Anna nodded. “As soon as I shower and change.”

“Go on upstairs. Take a bubble bath,” her mother told her. “You’ve been working too hard. If you’re not here in the office, you’re cleaning with the afternoon and night crews.”

“How else am I going to make you a rich old woman?”

Her mother smiled. “Make sure you have some breakfast. You’re getting too skinny. The scones are still warm on top of the oven. We’ll be fine down here. The schedule’s all set, and so far, none of the girls have called in.” She crossed her fingers.

Anna stopped at the doorway that connected the offices to the apartment upstairs. “So, is business booming?”

Her mother looked up from the schedule book. “Ronnie and her theatrics aside, let’s just say we’re building…one dust bunny at a time. But you know those TV commercials you did?”

“Yeah?”

“They’ve brought in three calls.”

“They only started airing two nights ago.” Anna gave the thumbs-up sign.

Her mother blew her a kiss. “I’ll hug you later, sweetheart, when you don’t smell like Charlie the Tuna.”

Anna started toward the stairs, smiling. Her mother had invested everything she could in opening her own commercial and residential cleaning business. It was a huge risk, but it had always been her mother’s dream. Anna wanted to see it come true, and would do anything to see that it did—from insisting her mother borrow the money Anna had been saving toward a down payment on a house to dressing up like a cross between a bag lady and a Las Vegas chorus girl, donning a rhinestone crown, grabbing a feather-duster scepter and pirouetting across a dusty sound-stage, singing the praises of the Clean Queens.

She was at the stairs when she heard the front door chimes, announcing a newcomer. Another customer, she hoped.

“Well, hello, sailor,” she heard Ronnie say. “Can I help you?”

She was at the first step when she heard a voice say, “Is Anna here?”

She stopped, a wash of heat drowning her. Everything stopped. Time reversed. Dimensions narrowed. There was nothing but that voice. A voice from her dreams.

“Who-o-o-m-m-m shall I say is calling?” Ronnie would be eyeing the man, giving him a good onceover.

“Kent? Kent Landover? Is that you?”

“Ma’am?”

“It is you—little Kent Landover. You don’t remember me? Of course you don’t remember me. The last time you saw me you were no more than knee-high. I’m Anna’s mother, Maureen…Maureen Delaney.”

“Anna’s mother?” First it was a question. “Anna’s mother!” Now it was glee.

“Little Kent Landover.” Her mother would be shaking her head in amazement. “Look at you now, all tall and handsome and grown-up.”

“Ma’am, it’s an honor.”

“Oh, honey, no need to stand on formality. You always were such a serious little thing. Come on over here and give an old lady a hug.”

Anna heard Ronnie laugh. “Yeah, sure, little Kent Landover. One of the most eligible men in America—until recently. I keep my list up-to-date, honey. Little Kent Landover waltzes into the Clean Queens, simple as you please and—”

“Oh, I’m not that Kent Landover,” the man said.

Anna gripped the stair rail, her knuckles arranged in a white row.

“No? Which Kent Landover would you be?” Anna heard the upward sail of Ronnie’s voice and knew the large woman was standing up now, erecting a barrier. “The poor-as-a-church-mouse illegitimate twin?”

“I’m K.C.”

Anna sank down to the bottom step. Her hand, a bony relief, clung to the rail.

“My name is Kent Landover—”

“Uh-huh.” Anna heard the guard in Ronnie’s voice. She’d be circling the corner of the desk, bringing her substantial bulk closer to the stranger.

“But I’m not that fella who owns some company out here in California.”

“No?” Ronnie had her weapons drawn and cocked.

“No, ma’am. There seems to be some confusion about that other fella and me. I’m nothing so grand. I do a little cowboyin’—”

“Cowboyin’?” The word, uttered in Ronnie’s south Bronx accent, seemed to bounce off the ceiling and around the room.

On the step, Anna sat, listening. She felt the smile soft on her face, the tears soft on her skin.

“Okay, K. C. Cowboy, what brings you to the Clean Queens?” Ronnie’s accent was more pronounced, her voice wary.

It was quiet, the moment before a storm. The breath holds. Wind stills. Birds go mute. Animals raise their heads, look with wonder. Anna’s head rose now, too, turned toward the doorway and the man beyond.

“I’ve come…” The voice paused, then came back stronger, clearer. “I’ve come to ask Anna to be my bride.”

Chapter Two

“What?” Ronnie exploded. The gale of voice filled the room and reached to where Anna sat. She didn’t react. Shock had already stilled her.

“Ronnie.” It was her mother’s steady voice. “Perhaps our guest would like a cup of coffee or tea?”