Dakota Home

“Then tell me why I come out of these sessions feeling like a big pile of horse manure.” His hands were tight on the steering wheel. “You want me to tell the world I’m a terrible husband? I admitted it once already. Wasn’t that enough for you?”

“I never said you were a bad husband, and besides, that’s in the past. All I want to do is build a better future for us both.” The tension between them grew, and sensing it, the baby started to fuss and then cry. Nothing Joanie did could quiet him.

“Now look what you’ve done,” she snapped, and even as she said it, she realized how unfair she was being.

“When the baby cries, it’s my fault now, along with everything else.”

Joanie ignored him while she struggled to comfort their son. Jason rested in the car seat between them, but everything she tried seemed to irritate him. With the baby’s wailing, plus the horrible tension between her and Brandon, Joanie soon felt like crying herself.

“I want you and the kids back home,” Brandon said, shouting to be heard above the baby. “I’d feel a lot better about everything if you were living on the farm.”

“It’s too soon,” Joanie muttered.

“Are you planning to walk out on me again?”

“I didn’t walk out on you the first time.”

“The hell you didn’t.”

He was speeding now, letting his anger affect his driving.

“Slow down!” she yelled. “You’re driving too fast.”

“So you intend to tell me how to drive, too! You’re trying to manipulate me and tell me how to live my life. You don’t want a husband, you want a whipping boy.”

“That’s not true, dammit!” She couldn’t believe he was doing this. Only minutes earlier, she’d been looking forward to this evening out. This was their weekly date, their time away from the kids, their chance to rebuild the foundation of their marriage. Her hope was that through these sessions with the counselor, they would rediscover one another and rekindle the desire that had once been so strong between them.

Brandon slowed down, and neither of them said a word. The baby eventually fell into a restless sleep, but the air throbbed with tension for the remainder of the drive into Grand Forks.

As they arrived at the outskirts, Joanie said, “Let’s just skip dinner, okay? I’m not hungry.” She couldn’t possibly relax and enjoy a meal with her husband now.

“Fine,” he said, his voice expressionless. “Whatever.”

Dr. Geist ushered them into her office soon after they entered the clinic. “Hello, Joanie,” she said, then smiled at Brandon. “Welcome, Brandon.”

She was a tall woman, thin as a sapling, with short white hair. The doctor at the pregnancy clinic in Fargo had given Joanie Dr. Geist’s name, and after a short interview by phone, Joanie had felt optimistic about the three of them working together.

“How was your week?” Dr. Geist asked, after they’d all had a chance to sit down.

Brandon looked down at his hands, so Joanie answered. “Good.”

“Fine,” Brandon muttered with little interest.

“Did you complete the homework assignment I gave you?”

“I did,” Joanie said, and reached for the diaper bag where she’d stuffed the folded sheet. Dr. Geist had asked them each to compile a list of strengths and an equal number of weaknesses.

“Brandon?”

He shook his head.

“Did the dog eat it?” Dr. Geist asked, giving him a humorous excuse.

“No,” he said flatly, “I didn’t do it. As far as I was concerned, it was a complete waste of my time and energy. I want my wife and family back. I’m not here to learn about my flaws and what a rotten husband I am.”

“No one’s—”

Brandon didn’t allow Dr. Geist to finish. “I want my wife back,” he said angrily. “I’m tired of living in an empty house. It’s been nearly twelve months since we made love. Condemn me if you want—”

“In other words, you just want me for sex?” Joanie asked through gritted teeth.

“No,” Brandon shouted, then changed his mind. “I wouldn’t object to us sleeping together, Joanie. In my opinion, these counseling sessions are useless.” He glared at Dr. Geist. “You want us to make lists? Fine, I’ll give you one. Ten reasons my wife and children belong with me. That’s the only kind of list you’re going to get.”

“Joanie,” Dr. Geist said calmly. “Are you ready to sleep with your husband?”

“No,” she said immediately. She wanted to rekindle more than desire. Yet sex seemed all Brandon wanted from her.

As far as she could see, he wasn’t really trying, wasn’t willing to do even the basic assignments Dr. Geist had charted out for them. He wanted everything, but was willing to give nothing.

“I’ve sacrificed a lot in order to save this marriage,” Brandon announced. “Nothing makes Joanie happy. It isn’t enough that she brought me to my knees, now she wants to walk all over me.”

“That’s not true,” she said, flushed with anger. “I’ve sacrificed, too.”

The entire session ended up being a shouting match between them. Joanie felt sick to her stomach by the time the hour was over.

As verbal as they’d been during the session, neither said a word on the ride home. What remained unspoken seemed louder than any disagreement they’d ever had. When he pulled into Buffalo Valley, Brandon didn’t get out of the truck to help her with the baby or see her to the house.

Joanie paused at the curb, but knew she’d only do more damage if she said anything now. Brandon was determined to misread any comment she made. The second she’d stepped away from the truck, he drove off, tires squealing as he rounded the corner.

Swallowing the hurt, Joanie walked slowly toward the house, afraid it was too late for them both.

Three

Hassie Knight knew she was an old woman, but she’d never let that stand in her way. For years people had been telling her that someone her age was supposed to retire, to rest and take it easy. She’d always refused to listen. Until recently.

Last February she’d suffered a heart attack that had left her weak as a newborn. Too weak to undergo open-heart surgery like those fancy doctors wanted. When they’d first suggested she stay in the nursing home, Hassie was convinced it would’ve been better had she died. But life was full of surprises, and she’d actually enjoyed the rest and made several new friends.

Then, a couple of months later, her strength restored, she’d had the needed surgery; she’d even let her daughter fly in from Hawaii to fuss over her. By July, she was well enough to attend Gage Sinclair’s wedding to Lindsay Snyder.

It’d been the most memorable summer in more years than she wanted to count. She was back, working at the pharmacy part-time—or at least that was what she let everyone think. Only Leta knew she spent as many hours at the store as she always had.

Leta Betts was her best friend, and now, since Hassie’s heart attack, Leta was her employee, too. Although it was difficult to think of Leta in those terms. Seemed they had far too good a time for this to be considered work.

This particular Friday was a good example. Leta had spent the entire morning mounting a display of different-sized tissue boxes in the front of the store. That woman was more creative than Hassie had realized. Leta had carefully stacked the boxes into the shape of the Eiffel Tower. When she saw what her friend had done, Hassie laughed until her sides hurt. A replica of the Eiffel Tower in Buffalo Valley. My, it was enough to bring on the giggles every time she thought of it.

“I’m going to the post office,” Leta called.

“You already heard from Kevin this week,” Hassie reminded her, knowing her friend was hoping for a letter from her youngest son.