The Spoilers / Juggernaut

Parker nodded his agreement. ‘No, it’s not. I don’t want to crack meself up, but I can’t think of another man who can do what you want. It ‘ud be a really bobby-dazzler of a job, though – wouldn’t it? Pushin’ the old Mark XI out to over twenty thousand yards – just think of it.’

Warren held his breath as he watched Parker struggle against temptation, then he sighed as Parker shook his head and said, ‘No, I couldn’t do it. What would Sally say?’

‘I know it’s a dangerous job, Dan.’

‘I’m not worried about that – not for meself. I could have got killed in Korea. It’s just that … well, I’ve not much insurance, an’ what would she do with three kids if anythin’ happened to me?’

Warren said, ‘I’ll tell you this much, Dan. I don’t think the worst will happen, but if it does I’ll see that Sally gets a life pension equal to what you’re getting now. No strings attached – and you can have it in writing.’

‘You’re pretty free wi’ your money – or is it your money?’ asked Parker shrewdly.

‘It doesn’t matter where it comes from. It’s in a good cause.’

Parker sighed. ‘I’d trust you that far. I know you’d never be on the wrong side. When is this lark startin’?’

‘I don’t know,’ said Warren. ‘It might not even start at all. I haven’t made up my mind yet. But if we do get going it will be next month.’

Parker chewed the stem of his pipe, apparently unaware it had gone out. At last he looked up, bright-eyed. ‘All right, I’ll do it. Sally’ll give me hell, I expect.’ He grinned. ‘Best not to tell her, Doctor. I’ll cook up a yarn for her.’ He scratched his head. ‘I must see me old Navy mates an’ see if I can get hold of a service manual for the Mark XI – there ought to be some still knockin’ around. I’ll need that if I’m goin’ to redesign the circuits.’

‘Do that,’ said Warren. ‘I’d better tell you what it’s all about.’

‘No!’ said Parker. ‘I’ve got the general drift. If this is goin’ to be dangerous then the less I know the better for you. When the time comes you tell me what to do an’ I’ll do it – if I can.’

Warren asked sharply, ‘Any chance of failure?’

‘Could be – but if I get all I ask for then I think it can be done. The Mark XI’s a nice bit o’ machinery – it shouldn’t be too hard to make it do the impossible.’ He grinned. ‘What made you think o’ goin’ about it this way? Tired of treatin’ new addicts?’

‘Something like that,’ said Warren.

He left Parker buzzing happily to himself about batteries and circuits and with a caution that this was not a firm commitment. But he knew that in spite of his insistence that the arrangements were purely tentative the commitment was hardening.

IV

He telephoned Andrew Tozier. ‘Can I call on you for some support tonight, Andy?’

‘Sure. Doc; moral or muscular?’

‘Maybe a bit of both. I’ll see you at the Howard Club – know where that is?’

‘I know,’ said Tozier. ‘You could choose a better place to lose your money, Doc; it’s as crooked as a dog’s hind leg.’

‘I’m gambling, Andy,’ said Warren. ‘But not with money. Stick in the background, will you? I’ll call on you if I need you. I’ll be there at ten o’clock.’

‘I get the picture; you just want some insurance.’

‘That’s it,’ said Warren, and rang off.

The Howard Club was in Kensington, discreetly camouflaged in one of the old Victorian terraced houses. Unlike the Soho clubs, there were no flashing neon signs proclaiming blackjack and roulette because this was no cheap operation. There were no half-crown chips to be bought in the Howard Club.

Just after ten o’clock Warren strolled through the gambling rooms towards the bar. He was coolly aware of the professional interest aroused by his visit; the doorkeeper had picked up an internal telephone as he walked in and the news would be quick in reaching the higher echelons. He watched the roulette for a moment, and thought sardonically, If I were James Bond I’d be in there making a killing.

At the bar he ordered a Scotch and when the barman placed it before him a flat American voice said, ‘That will be on the house, Dr Warren.’

Warren turned to find John Follet, the manager of the club, standing behind him. ‘What are you doing so far west?’ asked Follet, ‘If you’re looking for any of your lost sheep you won’t find them here. We don’t like them.’

Warren understood very well that he was being warned. It had happened before that some of his patients had tried to make a quick fortune to feed the habit. They had not succeeded, of course, and things had got out of hand, ending in a brawl. The management of the Howard Club did not like brawls – they lowered the plushy tone of the place – and word had been passed to Warren to keep his boys in line.

He smiled at Follet. ‘Just sightseeing, Johnny.’ He lifted the glass. ‘Join me?’

Follet nodded to the barman, and said, ‘Well, it’s nice to see you, anyway.’

He would not feel that way for long, thought Warren. He said, ‘These are patients you’re talking about, Johnny; they’re sick people. I don’t rule them – I’m not a leader or anything like that.’

‘That’s as may be,’ said Follet. ‘But once your hopheads go on a toot they can do more damage than you’d believe possible. And if anyone can control them, it’s you.’

‘I’ve passed around the word that they’re not welcome here,’ said Warren. ‘That’s all I can do.’

Follet nodded shortly. ‘I understand, Doctor. That’s good enough for me.’

Warren looked about the room and saw Andrew Tozier standing at the nearest blackjack table. He said casually, ‘You seem to be doing well.’

Follet snorted. ‘You can’t do well in this crazy country. Now we’re having to play the wheel without a zero and that’s goddam impossible. No club can operate without an edge.’

‘I don’t know,’ said Warren. ‘It’s an equal chance for you and the customer, so that’s square. And you make your profit on the club membership, the bar and the restaurant.’

‘Are you crazy?’ demanded Follet. ‘It just doesn’t work that way. In any game of equal chances a lucky rich man will beat hell out of a lucky poor man any time. Bernoulli figured that out back in 1713 – it’s called the St Petersburg paradox.’ He gestured towards a roulette table. ‘That wheel carries a nut of fifty thousand pounds – but how much do you think the customers are worth? We’re in the position of playing a game of equal chances against the public – which can be regarded as infinitely rich. In the long run we get trimmed but good.’

‘I didn’t know you were a mathematician,’ said Warren.

‘Any guy in this racket who doesn’t understand mathematics goes broke fast,’ said Follet. ‘And it’s about time your British legislators employed a few mathematicians.’ He scowled. ‘Another thing – take that blackjack table; at one time it was banned because it was called a game of chance. Now that games of chance are legal they still want to ban it because a good player can beat a bad player. They don’t know what in hell they want.’

‘Can a good player win at blackjack?’ asked Warren interestedly.

Follett nodded. ‘It takes a steeltrap memory and nerves of iron, but it can be done. It’s lucky for the house there aren’t too many of those guys around. We’ll take that risk on blackjack but on the wheel we’ve got to have an edge.’ He looked despondently into his glass. ‘And I don’t see much chance of getting one – not with the laws that are in the works.’

‘Things are bad all round,’ said Warren unfeelingly. ‘Maybe you’d better go back to the States.’

‘No, I’ll ride it out here for a while.’ Follet drained his glass.

‘Don’t go,’ said Warren. ‘I had a reason for coming here. I wanted to talk to you.’

‘If it’s a touch for your clinic I’m already on your books.’

Warren smiled. ‘This time I want to give you money.’

‘This I must stick around to hear,’ said Follet. Tell me more.’

‘I have a little expedition planned,’ said Warren. ‘The pay isn’t much – say, two-fifty a month for six months. But there’ll be a bonus at the end if it all works out all right.’