Escapade

“A relationship isn’t all candlelight and soft music, honey,” he said quietly. “It’s raw and sensual, and people get hurt. A man changes when he’s been with a woman he desires.”

“Yes. He doesn’t want her anymore,” she said knowledgeably.

“Not always,” he said sharply. “Sometimes he wants her all the time, to the exclusion of business, honor, morality, anything! That happened to me with Terri. I got careless because I needed her so badly. That’s why you saw us that night on the beach. I thought of nothing but her body, was so enthralled by it that I couldn’t go even one night without having it. She was just as hungry for me. That kind of attraction can blind you, even when love isn’t involved.”

“Oh.”

“That kind of desperation leaves you out of control,” he persisted. “It can convince you to make love in a parked car in the middle of rush hour traffic. That’s why I don’t have love affairs anymore. I have casual encounters that end almost as soon as they begin.” He dropped his eyes to her hands, which were locked together on the table. “I hate addiction. I smoke cigars instead of cigarettes because they’re easier to give up. I drink brandy, not whiskey, because I can take it or leave it. I never have more than one drink at a party, because I don’t want the risk of losing control.”

Amanda had known these things, but she also knew he was addicted to smoking, whether or not he admitted it to himself. It cut her heart to know that he wanted no deep relationship again. Because she did.

He got to his feet. “I have to meet someone at the airport in Nassau. Ted’s going to take me over in the launch.”

“All right.”

He paused, staring down at her. “You and I have been friends for a long time. I don’t want to lose that because we touched each other and flames kindled, or because you want something in business that I don’t want to give you.”

“You’ll always be my friend, Josh,” she said, smiling tightly. “I hope I’ll always be yours.”

He moved closer to her chair and, leaning a hand on the table, bent so that his face was much too near. His breath brushed her lips when he spoke.

“I owe you more than a broken heart.”

She reached up and touched his face. It tautened, and his eyes kindled.

“Do you want me?” she asked in a husky whisper.

“I’m bleeding to death for you,” he replied, his voice rough with passion. “And do you know what I’m going to do about it?”

Her lips parted on a rush of breath. “No. What?”

“Absolutely nothing.” He moved away from her, and the tension in his body was visible. “It’s the only noble thing I’ve ever done in my life. How’s that for a joke?”

He laughed bitterly. A minute later he was gone.

CHAPTER FIVE (#u54ebb397-f92d-5428-bdc6-20eb1b0060e7)

BRAD CLOSED THE deal in Montego Bay, but he took his time getting back to Opal Cay. He had real problems. He had to find a way to cover his bets before he lost something more precious than money. He needed cash, fast. His only hope was to persuade Josh to pull his irons out of the fire one more time. But that wasn’t really likely. Josh didn’t understand weaknesses, because he didn’t have any. He wasn’t vulnerable. Calculated business decisions were his life. He was one of the world’s strongest people, who never leaned or needed to lean on others. How could he possibly understand a passion for gambling? Not, Brad reflected, that he couldn’t quit whenever he wanted to. It’s just that until now, he hadn’t wanted to. Next time, for sure.

He felt something cold suddenly splash against his suit sleeve.

“OhmigodI’msorry!” tumbled out of the waitress’s pretty mouth. She was wearing a spandex skirt that barely covered the top of her thighs, with a clinging white body shirt open over the taut swell of brown breasts. She was blonde, blue-eyed, and incredibly sexy. So sexy that he didn’t notice the brown stain on his spotless gray suit sleeve or feel the wetness.

“Hello,” he murmured sensually.

“Hello!” she replied, grinning. Her hair was full of colorful, lacy bows. “I’m Barbara, your waitress.”

“Brad Lawson,” he replied, letting his eyes run down her. The five-star restaurant wasn’t crowded this evening. Except for himself and about five couples, it was practically empty. There was this walking dessert here, of course.

Her eyes grew big. “Really?” she asked. “Are you Joshua Lawson’s brother?”

Big brother was known everywhere. He wondered if Josh had sampled this delight and decided that he probably hadn’t. Josh’s taste ran to brunettes. In that way, if no other, he was predictable.

“That’s who I am,” he agreed.

“Your brother had lunch here once,” she said, explaining how she knew him. “I was crying because my mother had gone to the hospital with a heart attack. Mr. Lawson squared it with my boss so that I could have time off to sit with her. He’s very nice.”

He smiled, relaxing. “Yes, he is. So am I, of course. I’m intelligent, handsome, rich, and incredibly modest.”

She laughed. “Are you?”

He put his hand over his heart, momentarily taken out of his woes. “Modest to a fault. Bring me a vat of fried oysters and I’ll make all your dreams come true.”

She blushed, but she giggled, too. “Could you?”

“Can sharks swim? Away with you! Get those oysters. Hurry, we don’t have a second to lose!”

She laughed. “All right. Would you like something to drink?”

“A glass of champagne. Champagne and oysters are the secret of Casanova’s success, I’m sure of it.”

“Well,” she murmured with subtle coquetry, “we’ll see, won’t we?”

His body tautened at the look in her eyes. He smiled slowly. He wouldn’t make it back to the cay tonight. He hoped Josh wouldn’t scream too loudly.

* * *

AMANDA WENT UP to her room early, bored with her own company. She heard Josh go out, but she was fast asleep when he came home. And Brad still hadn’t shown up by morning.

It was going on nine in the morning when Amanda phoned Mirri in San Antonio, before she went down to breakfast. She hadn’t spoken to her best friend since the funeral, and she was feeling fragile. Josh was driving her mad.

“Are you okay?” Mirri asked her immediately.

“I suppose, except for having to fight Josh at every turn,” she replied.

“Really?!” Mirri enthused. “How exciting!”

She was glad Mirri couldn’t see her telltale blush. “For a foothold at the newspaper, you idiot,” Amanda murmured with forced humor. She lay back on the green-and-white-patterned bedspread with a sigh, her long black hair radiating out from her face in soft waves. “I mean, it’s not going to be an easy road to upper-level management. My credentials don’t impress him.”

“All that brainwork wasted.” The other woman sighed. “Well, if at first you don’t succeed...”

“I didn’t really expect him to turn the whole enterprise over to me. He said that I don’t have the experience, and he’s right. But I can get it,” she added stubbornly. “I was at least hoping for partial control.”

“Don’t step on any toes,” she cautioned. “The reigning editor has chopped off more educated and talented employees than you know. He’s underhanded and unscrupulous when it comes to keeping his cozy nest. The only reason he keeps Joshua in the dark is because your new partner hardly ever has time to get a look in.”

“You’ve been working for the FBI too long,” Amanda pointed out. “You’re beginning to sound like an agent.”

“Don’t I wish.” Again she sighed. “I’m just a paralegal with big dreams and bad eyes. Do you know what Nelson Stuart told me? He actually said my red hair was too blatant for a government agent!”