Unravelling

This means I’ve missed two days of school. Thursday Struz took me to see a specialist. She ran some tests, and hopefully she’ll clear me to drive when the results come back. And it’s not like anything ever happens on the first day of school anyway.

I missed an AP diagnostic and listening to the teacher read the syllabus? Oh, too bad. Friday my mother couldn’t stop throwing up, and even though I think she’s been taking all her meds, on days when her body has a physical manifestation of her depression, someone needs to keep an eye on her. And it’s not like my dad can do it.

“So, Bread Bites for lunch?” Nick asks when we’re standing outside my homeroom.

“I can’t,” I say, thankful for a legit excuse. It’s not that I don’t want to hang out with him—I do. I just hate that suddenly because I was injured he’s gone from goofy, immature, half-brained Nick to this skittish, hovering, insecure woodland creature who wants to attach himself to me at all times.

But Nick just looks at me, and he doesn’t jump to the obvious conclusion.

“Juniors don’t get off-campus lunches.”

A smile sweeps over his face, and he nods. “I can get you off campus for lunch. Or we can order delivery.”

And with that, the irritable, bitchy edge I’ve been walking around with the past few days melts away. Staying on campus for lunch as a senior is social suicide, and he’s risking it for me?

“It was awesome of you to bring Jared pizza, but you don’t need to worry about me like that.” Not that Nick’s popularity is going to suffer, but he never struck me as the kind of guy who’d forgo bullshitting with the boys to hang out with a girl. And I don’t need him to do that for me.

“Don’t look so surprised.” He laughs as he leans in and kisses the skin just beneath my ear.

Feeling his lips against my skin, I’m a little short of breath, and the smile on his face when he pulls back is almost enough to turn me into most girls.

Until I see Reid Suitor walk past us with his head down as he ducks into our homeroom. I don’t know exactly what I plan to say to him. But I know he was there when I died. He must know something.

“Gotta go,” I say to Nick before following Reid. He and I have been in Dockery’s homeroom since freshman year, and just like every other year, her walls are covered with old history posters—facts about US presidents, magazine collages about momentous dates or events. The only thing worse would be, of course, if the walls peeking out from behind the posters were painted something like a stifling bright orange. Oh wait, they are.

Per usual, Dockery’s animated face shines through her pile of platinum-blond hair, and she’s lost in a story about something embarrassing that happened to her while she was driving— seriously, her license should be revoked, not mine—but I wait, watching Reid, who’s perfectly in my line of sight.

He’s found the other two stoners in our homeroom, and the three of them are huddled together in the back corner as far away from Dockery as they can get.

I’ve never for the life of me understood Reid Suitor. Outwardly he doesn’t look like he’d have anything in common with Ben. His jeans seem like they fit, and he’s wearing a blue collared shirt and a gray V-neck sweater, which would look nerdy on most guys, but somehow it manages to look alternative on him. He’s always been cute—Kate’s probably still a little in love with him—and he’s got these bright blue eyes, eyelashes that extend for days, and sandy brown hair. Really, he could probably be some kind of Calvin Klein model.

But more than that, I know there’s a brain behind that pretty face. I had to proofread one of his essays in Honors Humanities last year—luck of the draw—and not only was his paper done, but it was actually good. Good enough that I had to struggle to edit it, which doesn’t happen to me often.

“Oh, Janelle!” Dockery says, handing me my schedule. “We missed you last week. I was so sorry to hear about your accident. I’m glad you’re okay!”

“Thanks,” I say before glaring at Alex, who’s already sitting at our usual table.

He just shrugs, like he can’t understand why I wouldn’t want Dockery—and thus the entire school—to know I got hit by a truck and came back from the dead. For someone so anti-drama, he’s clueless about how it starts.

With a sigh, I drop my bag next to him and flop into my chair before glancing down at my schedule. Once I look at it, I’m tempted to tear it into pieces.

It’s all wrong. Which is a nightmare. Because Miss Florentine, my guidance counselor, is overworked, and schedule changes are never guaranteed.

I look at my schedule again.

Earth science, American Literature, algebra, and chorus. So I’m supposed to take science for stoners, basic English, and freshman math. I wouldn’t mind chorus, but I don’t sing.

“Don’t be overdramatic. It’s not that bad,” Alex says. “Just follow my schedule. I’m sure we can get you bumped into my classes.”

Last resort, I could get my dad to call and complain, since that’s how things actually get done around here. I cannot get through junior year in classes with freshmen and stoners. “How full are your classes?” I ask as the bell rings.

“You should be fine for Spanish, but APEL . . . ,” Alex says, and I can’t stifle a groan. He wrinkles his nose. “Poblete had thirty-five of us on Thursday and forty-one on Friday.”

Thirty-two is supposed to be the cap on the AP English Language class. I’m doomed.

The majority of first period passes like this:

Alex goes to physics, and I head to the counseling office. The secretary says Florentine can’t possibly see me right now. I reword my request until she changes her mind.

Florentine says my schedule can be changed, but the classes I want are full.

I reword, and she sends me to Mr. Elksen, the VP in charge of scheduling, who can apparently override the rules.

Elksen’s secretary says I’ll have to come back later.

I try to reword, but she actually has a backbone.

I head to Principal Mauro’s office instead to see if she’ll override my schedule for me.

Her secretary says she’s busy, and I’ll have to come back later.

Mauro herself comes out to see what’s going on.

She says I have to fill out a schedule change request form and speak to Elksen like everyone else.

It’s amazing anything ever happens in this school.

I’m about to try to press my luck when the hallway double doors swing open, and Mauro stops listening and turns to see who else is interrupting her game of solitaire.

But it’s security.

And Ben Michaels.

His hood is pulled over his head, shading his hair and his eyes, the white earbuds of his iPod barely visible. He has no backpack, and as if he isn’t being escorted by two campus security guards, he just shuffles his ripped Chuck Taylors as he walks, with an ease that screams, I don’t care.

He’s just another one of those guys I can’t stand here, DGAFing their way through life.

“Miss Tenner?”

Ben’s head tips up at the sound of my name, and from underneath his hood, I can see his eyes widen in surprise for a second, before his whole body shifts, tension rolling through it.

I feel giddy with excitement, because he’s right here with the answers I need. My heart beats too fast—for a second—and then I remember we’re not alone.

I wish I could freeze everyone else and demand he clear up the muddiness in my brain and explain what happened at Torrey Pines.

But since I’m not magical . . . that isn’t possible.

I turn back to Principal Mauro. “I just really need to get my schedule fixed.”