Unreversible

Most likely, had it not been for a series of fortunate events, I too would have met the fate of the latter, but as fate would have it, I had a chance to try to fix at least something. Too bad I started too late, though, after many years of happy life in Eden.

4

June 18, 2038

My morning, like any morning in the last ten years, was beautiful. I didn’t have to rush anywhere, the sun was gently warming the ground, and the aroma of my wife’s cinnamon tea spread throughout the house.

For almost 50 years now, she’s been getting up before me, and every morning she makes a new and delicious tea – she just has this hobby of making the magical drink in different flavors. I was always amazed at how many recipes there are for making tea. I do not remember my wife repeating herself, though she had a cherished notebook somewhere, where she recorded the recipes she made and how good the resulting tea was. Marina, was a wonderful wife and a wonderful woman in every way.

To our daughters, Diana and Milana, she instilled a love of home, comfort, beauty – everything that would make them even more beautiful wives than Marina, and I myself envied their future suitors. I must say that they were clever, and like all the young people of Eden, they never worked, and they didn’t need to. When they were young, I couldn’t provide for them, so they had to make do with what they had. But when they were adults, I was able to buy them everything and more. That’s the way it worked for us. And that was the worst horror of my life. If anything happened to me, they would literally be thrown against the world, and the laws were getting stricter by the day, so I had to devote my life to providing for them today and making their future as serene as it is now. I have been lucky enough to have succeeded in many things.

We had everything: a four-bedroom house in St. Petersburg Eden, fully paid social security dues for a hundred years ahead, and a bank account for more than eleven million, which received forty-seven thousand koins in interest each month. At five thousand per person, we were living on our own, and I spent the rest of the money buying new stocks, gradually increasing our passive income. I would like to say that our life was boring, and I enjoyed boring myself for more money.

I lazily got out of bed and went to take a shower. I liked living here, but I realized with dread that I was getting more and more bored with it. That fact alone didn’t scare me, it was the consequences of my actions that scared me. I knew I could move to another Eden-type city, but my family and I had been to all of them, and we didn’t like any of them, and there was nowhere else to live with the same level of comfort-there were no other settlements of this type, and there were not even plans to build them. And living outside of Eden was suicidal-the average life expectancy there had already fallen to less than forty years because of the terrible environment and the level of criminal activity.

I spent all the time in the shower in nostalgic memories of the life that was in the Soviet Union, where everyone knew exactly what he had to do, what he was needed for, and how good it was when everyone in the country had roughly the same ideology. I got out of the automatic shower and wiped myself with an old terry towel, which I kept just out of habit. I had always been a junk man and never threw away junk; it was easier for me to think of new uses for it or leave it until better times than to take it to the trash.

I glanced at my watch and realized that I was finally relaxed-this was the third year in a row that I had gotten up a few minutes late, and now at eleven o’clock in the morning I was just on my way to breakfast. The whole family was already waiting for me at the dinner table, with a whole stack of thin pancakes and a dozen syrups of all kinds, and a big glass kettle on an automatic heated coaster in the middle of the table.

We sat and laughed and tried to think of something to do for the day, which was our tradition. We could talk like that in the morning and then, a few hours later, sit in a rented plane and fly to the other side of the world. And every day it was more and more difficult to come up with a new activity. Once we realized there were no good ideas, we decided to turn on the news – just in case we missed something.

It should be noted that all digital broadcasting now belonged to one social network, and the TV channel “News” showed the most interesting videos for our family from various bloggers. My attention was completely absorbed by the video where a poor boy somewhere in the Amazon jungle saw and filmed a wild jaguar. It was now akin to a miracle. How could one encounter a wild animal in this day and age! I even made a generous donation to this boy and began to speculate that this world was about to kill itself:

– Interesting! There are still places where there are wild animals after all. I would even pay the person who shows me a stray dog in Kupchino! – I philosophically exclaimed.

– You’re afraid of dogs! – My wife never missed a chance to tease me.

– Yes, but now I’m more afraid of robots. Honestly, I miss the days when you could buy bread at the store and give it to a mutt. – I was beginning to complain about life.

– So let’s get a puppy! – Diane loudly blurted out.

– Or better yet, two! – Milana instantly picked up on it.

– And a cat, too! – I started sneering, though I liked the idea. – And who will walk with them?

– Yes, we all have so much to do… – Marina said meaningfully and smiled widely.

We all laughed and went to pack – we could only buy a puppy in one place – the zoo. In general, the Edens were unbearably logically designed; there was practically nothing duplicative, moreover, everything was always in one place. There was a veterinary clinic next to the zoo, an animal owner certification office, a shelter, and an animal observation center.

When everyone was ready, we called a cab to go to the pet store. I’ve never had a car – I’ve always wanted one, but was afraid to drive, and now there are almost no private cars – it’s the lot of the richest people in the world. Everyone else was left with robot cabs, which always came quickly, were always clean, and, of course, there was only one operator for the whole world.

Fifteen minutes later we were already there. I sent my family off to look at the flora and fauna, and I went to get my pet license myself. I had to listen to a few hours of a stupid lecture and pass a test to get a permit, with which I could then buy a dog. As usual, a robot accepted the course fee, another robot took me to the auditorium, where a third robot showed me a long movie about how pets should be loved, as if someone had gotten dogs without feeling affectionate about them.

Anyway, I was able to pass the test the second time because I couldn’t tell several different pinschers from each other, and as a result, I was banned from buying dogs of those two breeds. I actually wasn’t going to choose these breeds, my dogs are supposed to be big and drooling, but it was still very frustrating, although I had accomplished the main task, it was only a matter of time.

I found my girls in the cafe that was in the zoo. They were eating ice cream, of course. There was a lot of noise, apparently they had brought children from behind the “fence” and showed them both the zoo and Eden itself, so they knew what they had to strive for. I always thought it was a kind of mockery of children: first bringing them from hell to heaven and then taking them back to blackness with the full knowledge that they are still no good, since they don’t live here. And the most cynical thing about this world was that all of these excursions were paid for and quite expensive for the parents of these children. But it was in such twists and turns that Toleko’s main policy lay.

We went looking for a pet store to buy the puppies that were to become the new members of our family, but unfortunately it was closed for quarantine. For some reason we couldn’t carry out our plan today, so we had to resort to the backup plan of buying a few bottles of wine and half a pound of mold cheese.

5

June 22, 2038

For several days now we haven’t been able to buy puppies, and it’s been pissing us off, especially since no one could explain to us what happened.

So for the past few nights we have been resentful of Thaleko and his comprehensive policy. My wife and I were reminiscing about the times when there were no industrial robots yet, and how good we were then. It was a very painful topic, because in part I always blamed myself for what happened to the planet. After all, I was the one who worked at AGV Solutions, and it was with that company that such a crazy automation race began.

That evening, we all went to our sauna as a family and for some reason the conversation about anxiety came up, I guess again it had to do with not buying puppies again, anxiety, and here I was for the first time admitting my biggest fear to my family. Surprisingly, no one was going to reassure me.

– I felt guilty about it all. – My phrase came out of the blue, I really wanted to be comforted.

– That’s because you are guilty! – Marina blurted out her remark as a crude joke, but I realized that she also thought I was involved in the disaster in the world.

– But I did not know that this would happen! – I began instinctively to make excuses.

– So? Are you going to regret it for the rest of your life? – My wife suddenly pointed out a new meaning to my life.

I don’t remember how that evening ended, or what we talked about, then we all slept to an old movie in the couch as a family. There was no fighting, but it was like I had no sleep at all. Slowly I got up and went to get some fresh air. I walked as quietly as possible, so as not to wake anyone, I didn’t even put my shoes on. The summer nights in Eden were very warm anyway. I decided to walk around my property. The dew touched my bare feet, burning them with a pleasant chill, and my mind was spinning with thoughts about how I could fix the situation in general. But I had no ideas, though I tried to think in different ways. And then, by some miracle, a strange but useful thought occurred to me.

I thought: what is the worst thing about slum life? It’s the terrible ecology and people’s lack of occupation. What if I could solve these problems at the same time? The most dangerous thing is the smog and ash, which must be removed first. Talo and his companies didn’t care about the common people, so here they have to save themselves. If they have a permanent and useful occupation, there may still be time to make things right. It was with this thought in mind that I returned to the house and lay down to sleep on the couch closer to my family.

At breakfast, I decided to share the evening’s reflections with the whole family. I never would have thought they would take the idea with enthusiasm. They were all eager to help me, perhaps my first useful initiative. So they were a little offended by my reluctance to take them along because I had worked all my life to get my family to live here. No, I wouldn’t let them voluntarily give it up, much less for the provocative idea of an old man who might just be starting to lose his mind. Despite the resentment, they still actively discussed my idea, tried to give advice and plan the process with me. Except that what I had in mind defied planning, so we simply decided: I would return to our old apartment in Kupchino and improvise on the spot, and if something went wrong, I would return immediately to Eden.

Until the night continued talking about my future attempt to save humanity, and every new word about it only added responsibility, it became scary, I somehow did not even really want to go anywhere, but my pride did its job. I decided firmly to try – I would go tomorrow, and whatever happens, after all, what is destined to happen cannot be avoided, and moreover, I personally had nothing to lose. I had already fulfilled my main goals in life, and I could only risk my life, but I had already lived long enough to fear for it; with age the fear of death was replaced by the fear of unfulfilled duties, and that was the only fear I had not had until recently.

6

June 3, 2038

This morning started out chaotic-we were packing me as a family for a trip that could take a very long time. My beloved wife was masterfully packing my things in a suitcase, placing literally a few dozen things in a few square centimeters. At the same time Diana was setting up my smartphone – she created my blog and wrote instructions on how to use it, set up a mutual transmission of coordinates so that I could always see where my relatives were and they could see where I was, activated an additional app so I could stream by myself, even though I was too old for all that. And Milana was carefully making a list of things I could use. And I was the only one sitting around drinking coffee, eating breakfast and watching the bacchanalia that was going on. I kept trying to figure out if they were so fed up with me that they wanted to get rid of me, or if they really believed that I could make the world a better place and were just trying to help? Either way, I wanted to think they still believed in me.

Of course, I still didn’t know what or how I was going to do, what it would be like to step outside of Eden and live in the very past from which I had so zealously fled. My altruistic goal of cleaning up the whole world, or at least beginning to do so, seemed distant, unrealistic, and somehow I remembered a youth that had transpired at a very different time. Back then I was a limited man, like all my compatriots, we could only dream of a job that would benefit people, and we also dreamed of traveling by train throughout our immense homeland. But my father had slightly different plans. Having worked as a shop foreman all his life, he understood that it was much better to work with his head rather than his hands. This is why, by hook or by crook, he was able to get me into the university, where I was to get an unusual profession of a marketing specialist.

At the time no one knew what it was, in fact throughout my career I always had to explain what I was doing, even though the word has become very fashionable. And, of course, no one had any idea how to properly teach marketers, so my diploma was obtained without much difficulty, and I instantly found myself at my father’s company, where I took an honorary position. The work, by the way, turned out to be wonderful: no one asked me for anything, and all work was reduced to endless meetings about how great it would be if something happened. However, I must say that I got a lot more money for this completely useless work than my father did – all I had to do was not to be late and to leave fifteen minutes later than the end of the day. Yes, that was how I learned that there is no justice in the world, and that the evaluation of work and actions is extremely subjective, but then, it was all in my favor. I was always lucky, though I never admitted it out loud, and I even forbade myself to think about it.

I told you that I also had another dream: to travel. This dream was not destined to come true. The first time I got on a plane was when I was forty years old, with my wife and children. I still can’t explain why it happened, even though I remember exactly that I had money and time. Throughout my life, I have seen all my friends and acquaintances have had their teenage dreams crushed, and I guess that was the plan. After all, we can only realize the true value of our desires after enduring dozens of failures and shedding several liters of sweat while trying to achieve our goals.

Then the collapse of the Soviet Union awaited me, a time of dashing perestroika, and a period of forming my new country, which had sprung up on the ruins of the previous one. Those times were not easy for anyone, but, nevertheless, all my acquaintances got families, apartments, and everything that everyone dreamed of. After all, man is an amazing creature, he can live and enjoy life under any conditions. Even in those conditions where there is no life, from this point of view, we almost do not differ from cockroaches, and I do not even believe that the nuclear winter can survive only these repulsive creatures, because as time has shown – our, human, species has remained, and about them I have long heard nothing.

In the end, life somehow got better on its own and a commercial boom began – everyone was providing some kind of service or producing something. And at some point there was so much stuff that it was hard to go to the store – there was too much choice, for example, there were thousands of bottled drinks alone, so it was with all the products. Uniqueness was gone, and companies had to compete with each other, and that’s where I made my first really big money. Suddenly it turned out that it was the marketers who could influence the situation. After all, our work is based on studying the market of competitors and consumers and offering the best solution in favor of the latter. It was at that moment that I got a spacious apartment in Kupchino and a big summer house, and on vacation I went not to the suburbs but to Paris.

The city itself grew and developed rapidly and attracted more and more new people who brought their money into it – it was a kind of vicious cycle of money, which for some reason was always scarce, as it turned out that gold is not shared equally. And each of the new residents wanted to show their superiority, not even thinking about the fact that no one was interested in it. So we had expensive brands, where a wristwatch could cost as much as several apartments. And these companies did not skimp on marketing salaries, I got richer with each new player in the market, and we dined at home less and more and more in restaurants. It seemed to me that this would always be the case, that the money would never run out, and that if disaster did strike, I would be free to find another high-paying job.

As I realized later, it was just an attack of stardom, nothing more. But I went along with it and opened my own business. I have always liked restaurants – I opened a trendy and prestigious restaurant, thanks to the demand for them. I built it myself, entirely with my own money, which had almost run out by the time it was finished. I still did not take into account a lot of factors that were not very expensive, but there were a lot of them, so the investment in my construction increased several times.

The first year was very hard – I didn’t know how to run this business or how to manage it, I had to learn everything all over again. By the time I was able to figure it out, I already had several loans hanging over me. I was barely making ends meet, but there finally came a time when my restaurant started to make a profit. It wasn’t much, but it was enough to start with, but then a new economic crisis began, which completely undermined the purchasing power of the population. My restaurant turned out to be the biggest mistake of my life, because it was simply empty. My dream had become useless, a problem and a pain in the memory.

What happened next? Yes, for the next few years I worked in different positions, desperately not understanding why nobody needed me. And when I did, I didn’t feel good at all. It turned out to be elementary: no one needed me before, I did not have the knowledge to be paid so generously, people just had money. There was plenty of it, so I could give it away, I didn’t feel sorry for it. Now I understood people less and less. The gap between social classes was so huge and so blurred that it was no longer possible to tell who was poor and who was rich. People seemed to go crazy in the pursuit of money – it was much more tragic than the famous gold rush. Back then in Alaska, only those who went there took the risk, but here the whole town measured everything in money. The most disgusting thing was that money replaced even my feelings.