The Newcomer

‘Ah, good morning, Audrey. Thank Geoffrey for turning on the heating, would you. Most grateful.’

Audrey was at her most domineering. She was feared by almost everyone, Piran being the exception. She turned her gimlet eyes to Penny, who immediately felt inadequate. ‘Mrs Canter, perhaps you can solve the mystery of my floral decorations?’

Penny swallowed hard but stood her ground. ‘Do you mean my clematis?’

Audrey found the most withering of challenging looks in her arsenal of withering looks. ‘I do. Please explain.’

Penny stopped herself from buckling. ‘My early clematis has just come into bloom and I thought it might, er,’ she searched for the word, ‘soften the structure of your altar arrangements.’

‘Soften?’ Audrey boomed.

‘Yes, the, erm … boldness of your design was, er … striking indeed, but maybe a little too harsh for the … welcoming theme of the day?’ she ended limply.

‘Harsh, Mrs Canter?’ Audrey Tipton took a step towards Penny but was interrupted by the arrival of her husband, Geoffrey, a man so henpecked and blustering he was known by the villagers as Mr Audrey Tipton.

‘Ah, Audrey, there you are,’ he panted.

Audrey became alert. ‘Are they here?’

Simon swallowed nervously and felt for his dog collar. ‘Angela has arrived?’

‘Where?’ barked Audrey.

‘Just parking,’ replied Geoffrey.

Audrey moved to get through the vestry door and out to greet them ahead of Simon, but Simon beat her to it. Penny smiled sweetly and pushed past Audrey too, pulling Jenna behind her. ‘Welcome to Pendruggan,’ beamed Simon as Angela got out of the front passenger seat. ‘How was your journey?’

‘We were a little early.’ Angela smiled at her husband, Robert, who was stretching his legs and closing the driver’s door. ‘So we went down to Trevay to have a look at it. So pretty.’

Robert walked round the car and shook Simon’s hand. ‘Hello. Good to see you again.’

Penny stepped forward and kissed Angela. ‘Welcome, at last!’ She turned to Robert, who was even more handsome than she remembered. She tried not to gush. ‘Hi, Robert. Welcome to Pendruggan.’

Out of the back seat unfolded a tall girl wearing a pair of super-tight white jeans, a crop top and a leather biker jacket. Her hair was long and streaked. Her face had all the sullen chubbiness of a teenager but Penny could tell she was a chrysalis ready to emerge as a beautiful woman.

‘And this our daughter, Faith,’ said Angela proudly.

‘Hello,’ said Penny. She pointed to Jenna. ‘And this is our daughter, Jenna.’ The Tiptons were pushing forward now, Audrey ready to assert her status as head of virtually everything in the village.

And then she saw Robert and gulped.

Tall, dark and handsome. His navy-blue eyes took in the sight of the gathering crowd of gaping villagers. A devastatingly attractive smile grew on his lips.

Angela introduced him, ‘And this is Robert, my husband.’

Penny swore later that the gathered women, and a couple of the men, fairly swooned.

Simon, totally oblivious to this sudden swirl of sexual tension, took Angela’s arm and chatted his way with her into the church. ‘I am so looking forward to meeting everybody.’

The church was packed. Penny, in the front pew, had Jenna on her left, Robert on her right and Angela on his right. She couldn’t help but notice that not only did Robert look good, he smelt good too.

The congregation stood for the first hymn as Simon, the church warden and the choir processed from the back of the church to the altar.

Penny looked around for Helen and Piran but couldn’t see them. Nor could she see Queenie. A spasm of worry unsettled her again. What if something had happened to her? Were Helen and Piran calling an ambulance?

Robert noticed her fidgeting. ‘Are you OK?’ he whispered. ‘Can I do anything to help?’

Biting her lip, she shook her head. ‘Just looking for friends who should be here,’ she whispered back.

The service continued with Penny’s mind dithering between anxiety about Queenie and trying not to flirt with Robert. There was little space on the pews today and she was very aware of his muscular thigh and strong left arm pressed against hers.

It wasn’t until the second hymn that the ancient door at the back of the church cracked open and Helen and Piran crept in. Helen gave Penny a little wave and mouthed a sheepish, ‘Sorry.’

Penny wondered what had kept them. Maybe they had overslept. And where was Queenie? Another chill snapped at her heart. Was the dear old thing OK? And where was this sudden anxiety coming from? Queenie could never resist a village occasion. Especially a chance to give the new vicar a once-over. It took all of Penny’s willpower to stay put and not get up to go to look for her.

Simon climbed to the pulpit.

‘How wonderful to see so many of you here today. I suspect it may not be my sermon you have come to hear but, more likely, you have come to get a good look at your new vicar.’ He paused for the laughter. ‘I shall ask her to stand up and give us a twirl. Ladies and gentlemen, the Reverend Angela Whitehorn.’

Angela clasped her hands to her chest in embarrassment, but stood, blushing and smiling.

The congregation scrutinised her. Medium height. Very slender. A kind face framed by a short, pixie cut. No make-up. Nails sensibly short and unpolished. She was wearing a knee-length black dress with dog collar, black tights and shiny black Mary Jane shoes. The majority conceded that she looked all right for the job. She sat down and Penny noticed that Robert immediately took her hand and held it proudly.

‘Let me tell you about Angela,’ continued Simon. ‘Upon graduating with an English degree from Manchester University, she joined the prestigious Manchester Evening News as a cub reporter. It was there, across a crowded newsroom, a handsome young politics writer caught her eye.’ Simon looked down to where Robert was sitting. ‘And became her husband. You may recognise him from his appearances on the television news. Stand up, Robert.’

Seeming embarrassed, Robert stood, so tall no one needed to crane their neck. He gave everyone a little wave and sat down again, whispering into Angela’s ear and making her giggle.

Simon continued, ‘A few years after they married, Angela began her path to ordination. This is her first parish as an ordained priest.’ He looked down from the pulpit at Angela and smiled. ‘It’s only on loan, though!’ Laughter came from the congregation and Robert put his arm around Angela’s shoulder and pulled her to him. Penny shifted uncomfortably, feeling envious. Simon continued, ‘Over the next year you will get to know Angela and Robert and their daughter, Faith, very well and they will also get to know you. I have trust and faith in you all to continue to build the fellowship within our community, and when Penny, Jenna and I return you will have many good things to share. Now, let’s sing one of my favourite hymns, and suitable for today, I feel, “To Be a Pilgrim”.’

After the service, Penny was still scanning the crowd for Queenie.

Simon and Angela were in the middle of the church, swamped by a deluge of curiosity and goodwill. Robert stood next to Penny, watching as his wife and her husband played the crowd like rock stars.

‘Your friends got here then,’ he said.

‘Yes. But actually, I’m still a bit worried about one of our villagers. She runs the village post office and stores. It’s not like her to miss something like this. She’d be wanting to know all about you and Angela. She is very nosy and loves all the gossip but is very kind too. We all love her.’

‘Maybe she’s busy?’

‘She’d never be too busy for this.’

‘I’m taller than you. I may spot her. What does she look like?’

‘She’ll be wearing some ghastly hat, probably green with feathers, and she has a distinctive scent of mothballs and tobacco. Oh, and she hasn’t lost her cockney accent even though she’s been here for ever.’

‘She sounds quite marvellous,’ he laughed.

‘Oh, she is.’ Penny spotted Helen and Piran making their way towards them. ‘Helen, this is Robert. Robert, this is my best friend, Helen, and her partner, Piran.’