Unlacing Lilly

He combed his fingers through his dark hair and frowned as if that were a complicated question to answer. “Until recently, Miss Lilly, I was shoulder to shoulder with him in interests. Just as anyone who cared for your sister would not have chosen me for her, I would not have chosen Olney for you. But Bella has proved to be my salvation, and if Olney is likewise inclined to change, then I would not stand in the way. If he is not…”

“If not? Then you would give me sanctuary from my lawful husband? Is this why you and Bella insisted that we move to your house?”

Andrew’s jaw tightened and he gripped her shoulders in his earnestness. “Lilly, try to understand. I wanted your family, including you, to have my protection should anything untoward occur.”

“Untoward?”

“Should you decide not to marry Olney after all. Or should you decide to leave him afterward.”

“What do you think he would do?”

She saw the defeat in his posture. “I can see that you are determined to proceed. I will respect your wishes, my dear. I will go inform Bella, and I’ll be back for you as soon as the last of Rutherford’s guests have arrived.”

Lilly frowned as he turned and opened the door. She was about to call him back and demand an explanation for his odd offer, but the Duchess of Rutherford was standing there with her hand raised to knock.

She pushed past Mr. Hunter carrying a small deep blue lacquer case with a jeweled clasp. “Oh! My goodness. I hope I am not interrupting. I must speak with Lillian immediately.”

“I was just leaving,” Andrew said with a stiff bow and a reassuring glance back at Lilly.

The door closed again and the duchess sighed heavily. “Well, as it appears this wedding is to go forward, I have come to do the proper thing.”

“The proper thing?” Lilly was bemused. She could not imagine what the duchess meant. This was certainly a day for out-of-the-ordinary behavior.

“It does not surprise me that you do not know of these things, Lillian. I believe we shall have quite a chore in bringing you up to snuff.”

Torn between embarrassment and indignation, Lilly bit her tongue. She did not want to quarrel with her future mother-in-law mere minutes before the vows.

The duchess put the lacquer case on the console table beside Lilly’s bouquet and turned Lilly to the mirror. “Does nothing occur to you, girl?”

She could see nothing in her reflection that needed fixing, except, perhaps, the duchess’s proximity. “Nothing,” she answered cheerfully.

“What would people say if you walked down the aisle like that?”

“Here comes Miss Lilly?”

“Do not be impertinent with me, chit!”

She sighed and reminded herself that she and Olney would be living at Rutherford House until they could find a suitable place of their own. It would be much better if she could find a way to be at peace with her.

She took a deep breath. “I apologize, your grace. I did not mean to upset you. But I really have no idea what is wrong. You designed the dress. You selected the modiste and milliner. You have made the preparations here at your own parish church and selected the refreshments for the reception following. I have only chosen the flowers. Are they not suitable?”

The duchess surveyed her bonnet and the bouquet with narrowed eyes. “They are nice enough, though I wish you had chosen something a bit more colorful. Something blue, perhaps.”

Lilly gritted her teeth. Had she chosen blue, the duchess would have wanted pink.

The duchess opened the lacquer box to reveal a stunningly elaborate necklace of flawless clear blue sapphires between two rows of smaller glittering diamonds. Lilly had never seen anything even remotely like it. Her astonishment must have shown, because the duchess smiled with satisfaction.

“Yes, I thought you might be impressed,” she said. “And there are earrings to go with it.”

“But…it is too much.”

“They are not a wedding gift, Lillian. They are the Rutherford Sapphires, the very best of the Rutherford collection. I have decided to loan them to you for this very special day. People will see them and recognize that you are one of us now. It is important that they believe we have approved of you.”

Believe they approved of her? Lilly smiled before she realized that the duke and duchess were only putting a good face on a poor choice. They did not approve of her, but they wanted their friends to believe they did. She nearly refused to wear the jewels, but she remained silent again as the duchess turned her back toward the mirror, lifted her veil out of the way and fastened the clasp of the stunning necklace at her nape. She had to remove her bonnet to attach the earrings, clusters of diamonds surrounding large sapphires.

She didn’t know what to say as she looked at herself in the mirror. She loved them. She hated them. She would wear them for Olney’s sake. “Th-thank you, your grace. I promise I will take good care of them.”

“See that you do. You and Olney will not be attending the reception as it would be improper of you to appear publicly for the next month, so I will expect you to return them before you leave the church. Rutherford or I shall come while you and Olney are signing your marriage lines afterward.”

“Yes, your grace. Of course.”

“Now I must return to Rutherford. We shall begin the wedding immediately after Rutherford’s brother arrives. I believe your brother-in-law is escorting you down the aisle?”

She nodded.

“Very well, then. And do not forget to pinch your cheeks before you leave the vestry. You need color, child.”

It was true. She’d gone quite pale. She turned away from her reflection and watched the door close.

Alone now in the small room, she shivered with a moment of panic. The next knock on that door would be her summons to walk down an aisle and then say two words that would forever tie her to a man she barely knew. Before she left this church, she would be Lillian Manlay, the Marchioness of Olney.

And with those two little words—I do—her whole life would become a lie. What she wanted would be hidden, what she thought would remain unspoken, what she said would have to be a polite evasion of truth, and what she felt would be denied. Her hands began to shake. Oh, dear Lord! Why had she not realized this before now? Could she do it? Could she commit her life to Olney, submit herself to him, knowing it was all a lie?

She lifted her massive bouquet from the console table and watched the delicate pink rose petals tremble as if in a wind. Then she remembered another pink rose, the single stem still fresh but now fully opened and lush, in a small vase on the dressing table in her room at Mr. Hunter’s house—the rose Mr. Devlin had given her at Covent Garden. At the moment she’d rather have that one rose given in honesty than her elaborate wedding bouquet as a symbol of the lie she was entering into.

That single rose…She’d held it to her lips this morning, remembering the brush of Mr. Devlin’s lips against hers. How could such a gesture cause her heart to skip and awaken such a sinful yearning for more? Certainly Olney’s forceful, almost brutish, kisses had evoked none of those forbidden desires. And if Olney was brutish in that much, would he be brutish in more?

The consummation loomed ahead. She had dismissed her misgivings before, preferring not to think of what was coming. And now she would finally know what he meant when he cast her hot glances and promised her an experience she would never forget. The sudden overwhelming urge to beg off washed over her and she fought it back, reminding herself over and over how much this marriage would mean to her family.

The next knock caught her unawares and she jumped. Mr. Hunter had come so soon? She tried to squeak out an invitation to come in, but her voice failed her. Instead, she reached out and opened the door herself.

“Mr. Devlin!”

He pushed his way in and closed the door. “Miss O’Rourke.” He surveyed her from the top of her bonnet to the tips of her slippers. His lips twitched and she couldn’t tell if he was amused or pleased. “You quite take my breath away.”

She tore her gaze away from his full, perfect lips—the ones she had just been thinking of. But he must have lost his way. “If you will go down the passageway and turn to your right, you will find the nave. I believe everyone is gathered there.”

He nodded. “I do not believe I will stay for the wedding, Miss O’Rourke.”

He was dressed in elegant formal clothes, as if he’d come for the event, but if he had not come for that, why was he here? “Your…your loan? But, as you can see, I do not have my reticule. Did you not say that you would collect from Olney?”

His lopsided smile almost undid her. “I shall. It is, in fact, the very reason I have come.”

“Then why are you here? I mean, in the vestry?”

He shrugged. “I am wondering if you are having second thoughts about walking down that aisle.”

“Heavens! What has gotten into everyone? Why is everyone asking that question? Have I done something to give people that impression?”