Verse and Worse

Автор

Harry Graham

Жанр

Зарубежная классика

Год написания книги

2017

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'I hae a wee bit hoosie,
An' a burn runs greetin' by,
An' unco crockit Minister
An' a bairn to milk the ki';

'I hae a muckle haggis,
A bap an' a skian-dhu,
A cairngorm and a bannock,
An' a sonsy kailyard too!'

'Bejabers!' said an Irishman,
'Acushla and Ochone!
There's but one country on the Earth,
Ould Oireland stands alone!

'Give me the Emerald Isle, avick!
With murphies for to ate,
An' as many pigs and childer
As the fingers on me fate.'

Exclaimed a Frenchman, 'Par Exemple!
Donnez-moi ma Patrie!
Vin ordinaire and savoir faire
Are good enough for me!

'Have you the penknife of my Aunt?
Mais non, hélas! but then,
The female gardener has got
Some paper and a pen!'

Then spoke a Greek, 'The Isles of Greece!
What can compare with those?
Thalassa! and Eurêka!
Rhododaktylos êôs!'

'On London streets I'm working,
With a vat of asphalt stew,
Putting off the old macadam,
And a-laying down the new;

'But the country of my childhood
Is the best that man may know,
Oh didêmi also phêmi,
Zôê mou sas agapô!'

Straight rose a German and remarked
'Vot of die Vaterland?
Ach Himmel! Unberüfen!
And the luffly German band?

'Gif me some Gotterdammerung,
And nuddings more I need,
But ewigkeit and sauerkraut
And niebelungenlied!'

'Nonsense!' exclaimed an Englishman.
('I surely ought to know!)
Old England is the only place
Where any man should go!

'Show me the something furriner
Who such a fact denies,
And, if I can't convince 'im,
I can black 'is bloomin' eyes!'

Then entered in the potman,
And pointed to the door;
'Outside,' said he, 'is where you'll go,
If I have any more!'

…

It was six friendly working men,
Brimming with 'twos' of gin,
Who crept from out the tavern,
As the Dawn came creeping in.

A LONDON INVOLUNTARY

(After W. E. Henley)

Spizzicato non poco skirtsando

Old Palace Yard!
Hark how their breath draws lank and hard,
The sallow stern police!
Breaking the desultory midnight peace
With plangent call, to cry
'Division'! This their first especial charge.
And now, low, luminous, and large,
The slumbrous Member hurries by.
Let us take cab, Dear Heart, take cab and go
From out the lith of this loud world (I know
The meaning of the word). Come, let us hie
To where the lamp-posts ouch the troubled sky, —
(And if there is one thing for which I vouch
It is my knowledge of the verb to ouch.)
So, as we steal
Homeward together, we shall feel