Private Lives

As he’d thought, the boy was lonely. “I’m sorry, Dudley, but my brother is older than I am.”

“What does he do? Is he also a writer?” she asked.

“No. Jason’s a lawyer and a good one. Here we are,” he said as he passed the Lake George sign. “If you don’t find a stove here, we can drive up to Rutland tomorrow morning. It’s a bigger town.”

“Don’t spend so much of your time helping me out when you should be working,” she said with a note of concern in her voice.

He was still driving when she made the statement, so he had to settle for a reassuring glance at her. “Every minute I spend in your company is time well spent.” When he reached the shopping mall, she still hadn’t responded to his efforts to draw her out. He parked and turned to her. “I do not play games with women, children or animals, Allison. Life’s too short for that kind of nonsense.”

She looked him in the eye and said, “I’m glad to know it. It’s comforting to know that you’re a man of your word.”

“I see you know how to play hardball. Good. It’s my style as well.”

“All right, Brock. Let’s stop it before it gets out of hand.”

He wished she hadn’t backed down, but perhaps she was right. If they continued, they would definitely get into a fight, and even though he wanted to get a rise out of her, he didn’t want to annoy her.

“Sorry. I’ll take my cue from you.” He’d put his hand on the door, but now he withdrew it, turned and looked at her. “I mean that in every way. Stay there.” He got out, walked around to the passenger door and opened it. Jack looked at him for instruction and he let him out. “Sit, Jack.” He reached across Allison, unbuckled her seat belt—surprising her when he did it—and held out his hand to her. His jaw almost dropped when she took his hand without a word and got out of the car.

“Which store do you recommend?”

He told her, opened the back door, lifted Dudley from his car seat and walked along with her, holding Dudley’s hand and Jack’s leash.

“We’ll sit out here while you shop.”

“I…uh…I’d hoped you would go in with me.”

He was waiting to be asked. “Wait here.” He tied Jack to a canine hitching post, told the dog to sit and went back to Allison.

“I hope somebody at the general store will be able to hook up this stove,” she said as they headed back to Indian Lake. “If I touch it, I’ll probably blow up the house.”

He took that as a cue that she didn’t want to ask him to do it and he decided not to offer. He was getting fed up with their cat-and-mouse foolishness. But he wished she’d lighten up and accept that he would gladly do whatever he could to make her life easier.

He saw a fast-food restaurant off the highway and drove into its parking lot. “Will a scoop of ice cream ruin Dudley’s dinner?”

“Probably, but he seldom gets out…Why not? He’ll love it.”

He put the car in Park and turned toward the backseat. “Say, buddy, I’ll buy you some ice cream, but you have to promise your mother that you’ll eat all of your dinner.”

Dudley clapped his hands with glee. “I will, won’t I, Mommie? I’ll eat everything.”

“If your mother tells me that you broke your promise, I’ll be very disappointed in you.”

“Oh, no, you won’t,” Dudley said. “I’ll eat all of my dinner. Can I have chocolate?”

“You may, indeed.” He tried to imagine the expression on Allison’s face as she gazed at him. If he were egotistical, he’d swear that she admired him. He shook it off. “You want to stretch your legs?” They got out of the car and Dudley surprised him when he grabbed his hand and said, “Can you go with me to the bathroom before we get the ice cream?”

He glanced at Allison, realized that Dudley’s request had surprised her as well, and said, “Sure,” as casually as he could. The boy had already become attached to him, which could become difficult the longer he was around Dudley.

As they walked away from the car, he said to the child, “I’m glad to go with you, but why didn’t you ask your mother?”

“’Cause she has to take me to the ladies’ room and I don’t like going there. I want to go to the men’s room.”

“You’ll soon be old enough to go to the men’s room by yourself.” What else could he say? He remembered how much he’d hated it when his mother took him to the ladies’ room. They found Allison leaning against a bubble gum machine in the front of the restaurant.

“It’s different, Mommie,” Dudley said as they approached her. “You oughta go see it.”

“He wants chocolate ice cream,” Brock said, changing the subject to one certain to engage the child’s attention.

Allison wasn’t talkative by any means, but as they ate their ice cream, he noted her unusually quiet manner. Distant. He’d almost call it standoffish. “What’s the matter, Allison? I’m not trying to undermine your authority or to make a place in his life. But I love children, and when they turn to me, I’m not ever going to push them aside.”

“I don’t think that. It’s…This is moving so fast, as if it’s going to have a life of its own and as if I have no control over it. I had a life that I didn’t control, and I don’t want that again.”

He could see that something ate at her constantly and if she said otherwise, he wouldn’t believe her. He’d thought that she could be hiding out in Indian Lake. What other reason would she have for secreting herself and her son away from civilization?

“I don’t want to control you or anyone else, Allison. I assume you’re familiar with the words no, don’t, stop and leave. You can use any of those words with me and I’ll understand.”

“That’s not what I’m talking about. You can control a person in many ways, including by being nice, all the while using subtle means to keep that person in line. Some people are skilled at it.” She stopped eating and leaned back in the chair. “Did you see Alfred Hitchcock’s Gaslight?”

He nodded. “I saw it. Did you experience something similar?”

“Not similar, but just as vicious.”

“Mr. Lightner, shouldn’t we go check on Jack? Suppose somebody steals him?” the worried little boy said.

“I pity the person who’s stupid enough to try that. Jack can definitely hold his own. All the same, we’d better go.” He reached over and stroked the back of Allison’s hand. “I’d like you and me to have an understanding. As far as I’m concerned, a casual friendship between us is unlikely. Are you ready to go?”

She nodded. “I hope someone at the store can install my stove this evening. Otherwise, what will Dudley and I eat?”

“Use the one you have tonight, and tomorrow we’ll get a guy who installs appliances. I’ll get a dolly from the hardware store and put the stove in the corner of your kitchen.”

Later that evening Brock defrosted a Swanson TV dinner for his supper. Alone, he thought about Allison’s reluctance to accept his friendship, even when he offered help that she sorely needed. It wasn’t as if she had the option of calling a handyman. There was no one for maybe miles around who could help her if the man in the hardware store didn’t come to work. He’d install the stove, but only if she asked him.

Early the next morning, the birds chirped and a soft cool breeze energized him. He sat on his back deck with Jack at his feet thinking of Dudley and of how easily he developed affection for the child. He didn’t need further proof that he would enjoy fatherhood. The raspberry bushes rustled in the breeze and he remembered a white wicker basket that he’d put in his pantry the previous summer. He went inside and got it. He was looking at what seemed like a bushel of raspberries and because Allison liked raspberries, he figured he’d pick some for her that were really fresh. In less than half an hour, he had filled the basket with large, plump, sweet berries. After forcing himself to wait until ten o’clock, he put the leash on Jack and patted the dog’s rump. “Come on, boy.”

A seemingly harassed and frazzled Allison answered his knock at the door. When she saw him, she put her finger to her lips for quiet.

“Hi,” she said. “Dudley’s in his room doing his math assignment and if he hears your voice, that will be the end of it. Come on in.”

“You didn’t call someone to install your stove,” he said, sensing the reason for her frustration. She shook her head. He handed her the basket piled high with raspberries. Her eyes sparkled.

“I picked these for you a few minutes ago and my fingers are all scratched up. Don’t I deserve a kiss?” She clutched the basket as if it held diamonds. He took it from her and put it on the table beside them.

“Look at my fingers,” he said, pretending to beg for sympathy. “Don’t I deserve a kiss?”

A smile crawled over her face. “You do, but I think it’s best that you and I avoid playful kissing.”

He sobered at once. “Let me tell you, Allison, when I kiss you, there will be nothing playful about it.” A gasp escaped her lips as she sucked in her breath. “That’s right, and it’s what I want to do to you right here and right now.”