Return To Little Hills

When she returned a moment later, she had two glasses and a bottle of wine. Blush, Edie observed with a surreptitious glance at the label. Snob, she scolded herself. Ben had once used a UN transport plane to ship two cases of Italian wine to Sarajevo. “Nearly broke my back carrying it to the car,” he’d said as he’d poured her a glass. “But it beats the hell out of the local plonk.”

Edie watched Viv fill two balloon-shaped glasses with pale pink wine. “So,” she said. “Shall we make a toast?”

Vivian hooted. “Shall we make a toast? Shall? Jeez, Edie, when did you start using words like shall? You sound like Peter Darling. That’s one of the things Ray hates about him, one of many things. Apart from the fact he’s younger than Ray and gorgeous.” She downed half her wine and refilled the glass. “Talk like everyone else, for God’s sake. This is Little Hills not Buckingham Palace.” She paused for a moment. “Sorry. I didn’t mean to get started, it’s just that I hear enough about Peter Darling from Ray.” She touched her glass to Edie’s. “To my little sister with her hoity-toity voice being home again. Joking, Eed.” She patted Edie’s knee. “Don’t look at me like that. It’s great to have you here. Really.”

“It’s great to be here,” Edie said, averting her eyes.

Vivian glanced over her shoulder and moved fractionally closer. “I’m in a quandary, Edie. A real quandary. Remember Beth Herman?”

Edie thought. “Beth Herman from high school?”

Viv nodded. “She works at Luther now. Peter Darling hired her to run this new teen mother program—which Ray says is a complete waste of money. All it does is encourage kids to have sex, but anyway, she’s in love with him.”

“Ray?”

Viv smacked Edie’s knee. “Peter Darling, doofus. I mean, she’s gaga over him and she keeps coming to me for advice. I’m happy for her, of course—I mean, Beth’s such a sweet girl, she deserves to find someone—but I’m torn. I hear Ray going on about what an idiot the guy is and Beth telling me how he’s so wonderful and I don’t know whether I should be encouraging her or what.”

“Hmm.” Edie took a carrot stick and tried to think of something to say. “Well, he seems very nice,” she said neutrally. “Interesting. Attractive.”

“Attractive.” Viv hooted. “Did you see him? He’s gorgeous. I mean, drop-dead gorgeous. He’s like a cross between Ralph Fiennes, Daniel Day-Lewis and…who was that poet I had to study in high school? Myron, or something?”

“Byron?”

“Yeah, I guess. I don’t know what Byron looks like, but that’s what Beth says. I tell you…” She sighed loudly. “If it’s not one thing, it’s another. Any idea what I should do?”

“Well, Viv, it’s not really your problem, is it? Peter and Beth are adults.” A thought occurred to her. “Is it mutual?”

“Who knows? Beth isn’t sure, but she’s so sweet and nice and they’re both in education. How could it not be? And she’d be a wonderful mother to his little girls. I mean, how many women would want to take on four kids?”

“Certainly not me,” Edie said. Although, having met Peter Darling, she felt quite sure he’d have no shortage of candidates. “Sounds like a nightmare.”

“Well, you’ve never had the maternal streak.” Viv poured more wine. “Anyway, enough of that. I’m worried about Ray. Here he’s been knocking himself out for years, nothing he wouldn’t do for those kids. And everyone just knew he was a shoe-in for principal once Frank Brown retired, but then what happens? The school board brings in this Peter Darling, who’s probably five years younger than Ray—which, trust me, doesn’t help things—and so damn pie-in-the-sky you wouldn’t believe it.”

Edie stifled a yawn. Except for the Beth Herman element, they’d been over essentially the same ground on the ride home from the airport. She hadn’t been particularly interested then and, despite the new principal’s considerable appeal, time hadn’t increased her thirst to know more. What she wanted to do was collect Maude, drive back to her mother’s house and then sink into oblivion. Selfish, selfish, Maude’s voice scolded deep in her brain. You’ve always been selfish, Edith. She drank some wine and tried not to grimace at the flowery sweet taste.

“What exactly do you mean by pie-in-the sky?” she asked in a tone that made her think she should have a pen in one hand and a notebook on her knee.

“Oh…” Viv reached for the wine again. “You know what? The hell with this rabbit food, I need salt and fat.” She jumped up again and returned a moment later. “Actually, it’s some sort of artificial fat,” she said as she dumped a bag of chips into a yellow bowl. “Don’t ask me how, but they say your body doesn’t recognize it, so it passes right through you. God, that sounds gross, huh? Come on—don’t make me feel like a pig. Try one. Have some more wine.” She reached to refill Edie’s glass, and then the front door slammed.

“Shh.” Viv flashed Edie a warning look and drained the last of her wine. “Here’s Ray. Don’t mention Peter Darling’s name or the whole evening will be ruined.”

“Hey, Edith,” Ray said with a glance at the wine bottle. “Been leading my wife astray? Nothing changes, huh?”

“Now, Ray, be nice.” Vivian gathered up the wine and glasses. “Poor Edie’s been with Mom all day, she needed a little drinky. She was just telling me about her job. God, you’d better be glad you’ve got me. Listen, babe, you stay and talk to Edie while I go into the living room and make Mom pretty. Her hair needs a trim,” she said to Edie, “And, naturally, she won’t let anyone but me work on it.” She winked at Edie. “Now, be good, you two. I’ll be back in a jiff to finish dinner.”

“Let me give you a hand.” Edie extracted herself from the billowing contours of the couch. “What can I do?”

Ray hooted. “You mean you’ve learned to cook, Edith? What you going to feed us, stewed yak or something?”

“Ray.” Viv who had disappeared into the kitchen, reappeared in the doorway, grinning widely as she shook her head at her husband. “I told you to be nice. Ignore him, sweetie,” she told Edie. “He’s just showing off. Could you maybe make a salad?”

“I’ll give it a try,” Edie said, biting back a sarcastic response. In the kitchen, she eyed the wineglasses Viv had set in the sink. Her own was still full. Perhaps she’d just hold her breath and gulp it down; anesthesia against the rest of the evening. And then Ray was behind her, his arms around her waist. She removed his hands and turned to look at him. “Lettuce,” she said, increasing the distance between them. “You wouldn’t know if Viv has any tomatoes, I guess.” She pulled open the refrigerator’s stainless-steel door. Cold air hit her face. “Lettuce, lettuce, lettuce,” she said. “Bottom drawer. Crisper. God, I’ve never seen a refrigerator this big. You could chill a…yak. Okay, lettuce.”

“So how long has it been since I saw you last?” Ray asked. “Five years?”

“Six.” She pulled out the lettuce and closed the door. Ray leaned against the sink, arms folded across his chest. She’d taken his measure, too; he had lines around his eyes now, the thick blond hair had faded and thinned, and the smile that had made her knees weak in high school struck her as goofy now. Her face colored, anyway. “When I came back for the high-school reunion, you and Viv were on vacation. Before that it was Mom’s heart attack. That was the last time.”

He nodded. “Sorry I couldn’t be at the airport to meet you. School board meeting. New principal’s big on everyone attending. What do you think of him? Kind of out of place with Luther kids, isn’t he?”

“Oh, I don’t know.” She took the lettuce to the sink and began separating leaves. “He seemed fine to me. What do you see as the problem?”

“Aagh.” Ray shrugged. “Don’t even get me started. He won’t last long, that’s all I know. I could have had the job if I’d wanted it. School board practically begged me, but I wasn’t interested—too much work. I’ve got a family. The boys. More important things in life than chaining yourself to a desk.” He laughed. “’Course, I’m probably telling that to the wrong person, right, Eed?”

Edie felt the knot in her shoulders ratchet up another notch. Salad. Could she possibly do a Caesar? She’d once spent half a day putting together a Caesar salad for Ben. Finding the necessary ingredients in a shattered Belgrade marketplace had been a challenge, but he’d confessed to a nostalgic yearning for the kind of Caesar salad he’d enjoyed at a certain Los Angeles restaurant. He’d been unimpressed, less by the salad than by what the effort said about her priorities. “Don’t go getting domestic on me, Edie,” he’d warned. “It’s not what I need or want.”

She took a couple of eggs from the fridge and set them in a pan of water to simmer. Back at the fridge, she dug around for anything resembling Parmesan. She could feel Ray’s eyes on her back.

“So what time will the boys be here?” She thought again about the nephews she’d watched grow, mostly through pictures sent by Vivian, from cute, wide-eyed babies to strapping, athletic teenagers and felt a stab of remorse. “I will get to see them, right?”

“Oh sure,” Ray said vaguely. “Hey, Eed, remember that day after school when we were goofing around in your mom’s kitchen and I squeezed Thousand Island dressing into your mouth?”

Edie watched his face for a moment. “Not a day goes by that I don’t relive that experience, Ray. It haunts my dreams.”

Ray’s forehead creased. “You being sarcastic?”

“Bingo.”

“You ever try not being sarcastic for more than five minutes?”

“Once. I was bored.”

Ray shook his head. Clearly, there was no hope for her. He took a beer from the fridge, popped the top, and stood with his back against the granite countertop watching her move around the kitchen.

“You were pretty hot back then,” he said.

“Thank you, Ray. So were you. Back then.”

“You ever think about the way things might have turned out if we’d stayed together?”

“No, Ray.” She looked directly at him. “I don’t. I’m happy with my life. And it looks like you’re doing well too. This house, by the way,” she said with a sweeping gesture at the kitchen, “is amazing.”

“You like it? Viv give you the grand tour?”

“She did.” Behind the jars of mayonnaise and bottles of ketchup and mustard, Edie found a green tub of grated Romano cheese. “It’s huge. You guys must get lost going from one room to another.” She set the cheese down on the center island. Out in the living room, she could see the top of Maude’s white head. Her mother had all but disappeared amidst the massive pillowy cushions of the couch. The coffee table on which Maude’s feet rested was several feet of mirrored glass atop a low chrome cylinder. “Very elegant,” Edie said. “Impressive.”

Ray gave her a look that seemed to calculate her sincerity. “But it isn’t what you’d buy, right?”

“What does that matter? It’s your house.”