Her Longed-For Family

His skin, which was as coarse as a plowman’s, brushed hers above her collar. Closing her eyes, she savored the sensation that banished the day’s chill. The contact was inadvertent, she knew, and she should pay it no mind. Easily thought, impossible to do.

Coming to her feet, Caroline shook herself. She needed to be sensible. Featherbrained flirting and stolen touches were for young misses looking for husbands. She was neither a young miss, nor did she want to remarry. Too bad she could not convince her nerves that danced with delight. She needed to get them under control again.

Immediately.

* * *

Jacob kept his eyes on Joy, who was trying hard to walk, wobbling even while he held her hands. Gil marched like a small soldier in front of the baby, encouraging her to follow him.

“Should I thank you, my lady, for rescuing my ears from the Winwood sisters?” he asked.

“I seldom talk of someone else’s business,” Lady Caroline replied, “but nothing can change the subject for the Winwood twins more quickly than a tidbit of information they have not heard before.”

“I saw the results with my own eyes.” He chuckled as he raised his gaze to the uncertainty on her face. “And heard it with my own ears.”

“They mean well. They were among the first to welcome the children to Porthlowen.”

“After you and your family did.”

“Actually, I believe they were on the sand when the children were rescued, so they saw them before I did. Many of the villagers went to see what the commotion was.”

“But none of them saw who shoved the boat into the water?”

“No.”

He frowned. “That means someone or maybe multiple someones are lying.”

“Or not telling the whole truth.”

“What is the difference?”

“In this case, nothing.” She smiled. “I should know better than to discuss matters of logic with someone who taught at a university.”

Gil yelled with excitement as snow began to fall around them.

“Try this.” Jacob stuck out his tongue to capture a snowflake.

The little boy had a difficult time keeping his tongue stuck out because he giggled every few seconds. He ran around, bumping into people, until Lady Caroline called him to her side. He obeyed and kept his mouth open in case a snowflake fell into it.

When Lady Caroline frowned, Jacob said, “Don’t scold him for copying what I did.”

“I should scold you instead?”

“Nobody should be scolded. Every boy needs a few bad habits,” he said with a laugh. “It is only as we grow older that we have to become civilized and require tuition in how to become so. Speaking of lessons, when would you like me to come to Cothaire for our first one?”

She picked up Joy and cuddled her close. He liked how her face softened with love as she looked at the baby. A twinge cut through him as he thought of his promise to help discover the whereabouts of the children’s families. It was painful to imagine her happiness becoming grief when she had to return the children.

“That is your choice, my lord,” she said, drawing him from the uncertain future to the present. “You have many tasks while I am at loose ends. If it is more convenient, I can come to Warrick Hall.”

“Go Warrick!” Gil forgot about snow as he tugged on Jacob’s coat. “Cuddle kitties.”

Jacob arched his brows. “News does travel fast in Porthlowen.”

“He asked about the cat hair on me the other day.” She smiled an apology before looking at the little boy. “Lord Warrick is a busy man, so you need to wait for him to ask you to visit.”

Gil nodded.

“How are the cats doing?” she inquired.

“Well. Since we brought them into the house, the mother cat and her kittens have left dozens of dead mice at the kitchen door. The cats prowl the corridors, the closets and the corners.”

“It sounds as if they are making themselves right at home.”

“I would say so. They show no interest in returning to the stable. Mrs. Trannock is pleased the cat has already killed or scared away the mice that chewed on boxes and bags in the pantries. Though I wonder how long the cats will hunt.”

“Why?”

“I have no doubts the mother cat is being fed treats, because she often follows Wherry around the house like a shadow. Actually three shadows, because her kittens go wherever she does.”

“Go see kitty now?” asked Gil.

He laughed when Lady Caroline rolled her eyes at the little boy’s idea of patience being quiet for barely a minute. “That is Lady Caroline’s decision. You are welcome any time you wish.”

“Now?” Gil whirled to Lady Caroline.

Over the little boy’s head, she met Jacob’s eyes evenly. “I would not mind examining those blankets you found. Will your carriage hold all of us?”

Carriage!

How could he have forgotten Howell had had the carriage waiting when he came out of Warrick Hall? The carriage horse needed exercising, and Shadow, his Arab, was reluctant to come out of his cozy stall on such a cold morning.

Jacob had considered returning the horse and carriage to the stable and having his horse saddled, but he had been late already. He decided he would take the carriage because no one else would be in it. He need not worry about another tragedy.

His stomach ached as if someone had punched him. Take them in his carriage? For the past three years, he had been successful in devising excuses to avoid having passengers with him. So successful he had let his guard down today.

Lady Caroline’s simple question brought forth his unreliable memories. Many were bits and pieces of sights and sensations. His stepmother believed it was because he had struck his head hard against the road. He recalled a fragment of something Virginia Greene had said to him earlier that evening, but only a few words. Something about being vexed with him. Because he had not asked her to marry sooner? He had hesitated to propose because she could be fickle in her moods, but he had promised Beverly he would make Virginia an offer of marriage that night. He could not recall getting on one knee to propose, but he must have. He could remember a splinter of agony when he woke by the broken carriage. It was as if every bone in his body had broken, though only his arm and two ribs had. He would never be able to forget the unsteady image of Virginia lying on the ground, not moving. The next thing he knew, his brother was leaning over him, calling his name. A haze of pain; then nothing until he awoke in his bed.

If he could only remember what had happened before Emery arrived... Those memories were gone, along with everything before he and Virginia had stepped into the carriage. He recalled Virginia pleading with him to let her drive, but was unsure if her words came from that day or another. Why would he have agreed to let her drive if the roads were not safe? But he clearly had, and she had died.

“Is something wrong?” Lady Caroline asked as her gaze searched his face.

How he wished her eyes were not keen! Then again, sweat beaded on his forehead, and he had frozen in midstep. Even the most opaque person would notice something was amiss.

Hoping no sign of his thoughts emerged into his voice, he said, “Nothing important.” Guilt surged through him anew at his lie, so he amended, “Nothing that is important right now.”

“If you are worried about traveling in an open carriage with the children, I assure you that Gil has no intentions of letting go of your coat.” A smile drifted through her words. If it was on her face, he could not tell because he stared at the ground. “He does not plan to let you out of his sight until he is able to pet your kittens.”

Perspiration cascaded along his back, even though the air was cold. How could he explain to her that just the idea of having her and the children as his passengers during the short drive from the church had revived the disgust and guilt and anguish he felt in the wake of the accident?