His Longed-For Baby

In fact, it was probably Karen out there, she thought with a touch of guilt for ignoring her friend. Hopefully she would go back and join the others because she really didn’t want to see anybody until she’d got her thoughts under control.

She gave a silent snort.

‘Thoughts? What thoughts?’ she muttered under her breath.

She’d been home for an hour and she was still replaying the moment when all her dreams had shattered into dust. For several interminable moments her brain had turned to mush when she’d overheard Liam’s gloating conversation with his best man, Jake. Where she’d found the words to throw at her bridegroom-to-be she’d never know, especially when just the thought of them made her hands begin shaking again.

The thing that frightened her most, though, was the thought that she might not have overheard Liam—that it might have been years before she’d discovered the full extent of his duplicity.

There was a second tap at the door but she was too wrapped up in the enormity of her lucky escape to pay it much attention.

If Karen hadn’t persuaded her that they all ought to go out for a drink this evening…

‘Come on, Maggie,’ she’d wheedled. ‘I know you’re not one to make a big fuss, but at least you can share a drink with the rest of us in the house so we can say our farewells to you. After all, tomorrow you’re moving everything to Liam’s.’ Then, correctly reading Maggie’s hesitant agreement before she’d said a word, her friend had quickly added, ‘And you have to invite our gang from the department, too. We could go to that clubby sort of place that opened up recently on the other side of the high street. It could be an unofficial hen night.’

It had all been so informally arranged that if Maggie hadn’t known how much her colleagues relished the chance to escape from the traumas surrounding them in a busy accident and emergency department she’d have been surprised just how the numbers had snowballed.

She supposed she shouldn’t have been surprised that Liam and Jake had chosen the same establishment. They’d been friends since they’d met during their medical training, and not only had Liam asked Jake to be his best man but he’d been the person responsible for introducing the two of them in the first place. Anyway, Rendezvous would be the most obvious venue for such a celebration, being in such close proximity to the hospital.

It had been sheer chance that she’d been sitting out of sight on the other side of an over-exuberant arrangement of palm trees and plastic ferns, chatting to Karen while she waited for her specially concocted cocktail—courtesy of the management when they’d discovered that she was getting married in the morning…

If Liam and Jake hadn’t stopped to talk on the other side of the same display she wouldn’t have been in a position to overhear Jake ask Liam how he’d persuaded his bride-to-be to give up her long-held dream of having a large family.

‘It won’t be a problem,’ she’d heard Liam say, his airy unconcern covering her gasp of disbelief. ‘It’ll probably take Maggie several years before she twigs that nothing’s happening on the pregnancy front, and as I’ve already had two kids she’ll automatically assume that it’s her fault. And by the time she’s gone through all the tests…’

‘You mean you haven’t told her?’ Jake cut in harshly, and the icy anger in his voice raised the hairs on the back of Maggie’s neck. She’d rarely heard that edge to his tone and she’d been working with him for nearly two years. Jake Lascelles might be her senior in the accident and emergency department but he couldn’t be a more easygoing boss. Right from the first they’d become friends—friendly enough to share middle-of-the-night confidences.

‘Have I told Maggie about the vasectomy? No way!’ Liam exclaimed jocularly, completely oblivious to Maggie’s shocked exclamation. ‘She’s far too good a prospect to miss out on. The kids love her and she already dotes on them enough for me to know that she’ll be happy to keep them out of my hair. Anyway, two rug rats are enough for anyone. With Julia going off like that, I didn’t have any choice about getting dumped with custody of them, but I’m not stupid enough to want any more—not with my career taking off the way it is.’

‘But you’ve told her that you’re looking forward to having another one as soon as you can—the first of several,’ Jake argued.

Maggie could have died on the spot as she heard her private plans voiced in public. She could remember all too clearly the way she’d happily chattered to Jake during a night-shift lull, confiding that she and Liam were hoping to come back from their honeymoon with their first baby already on the way.

‘I bet you’d promise the same thing if you were looking forward to plenty of action on your honeymoon,’ Liam joked coarsely. ‘Can you imagine it? Because of her scruples about the kids being in the house, the damn woman wouldn’t even move in with me until we’re married. She’s going to be more than willing to share a bed with me if she thinks we’re trying to make babies.’

Maggie’s ears were filled with the frantic beating of her heart and she wondered whether she was going to be sick. But even though the noise seemed loud enough to fill the room, it didn’t drown out Liam’s voice as he continued inexorably to demolish all her dreams of happily-ever-after.

‘Then, by the time she finds out there’s never going to be the patter of tiny feet, the kids will be old enough for me to pack them off to boarding school and I’ll be free to play the field again. Not that she’ll know what I get up to in the sluices and linen cupboards once she gives up her job to look after the kids, but, then, what the eye doesn’t see…’

Maggie felt strangely light-headed as the extent of his duplicity became clear, and she found herself clinging to the edge of the table with white-knuckled fingers, wondering how she’d got herself into such a devastating situation.

Jake had introduced her to his old medical school friend nearly a year ago, and although she’d teased him about trying to be a matchmaker, she’d immediately been impressed by Liam’s dedication to his work—the feeling of awe she’d always felt about the complexity of cardiothoracic surgery increasing his stature in her eyes.

He didn’t have the charisma or looks that Jake had, neither did he send the same shivers down her spine, but Jake had made it perfectly clear right at the outset that there would only ever be friendship between them, so she’d had to settle for that.

Gradually, over the months of Liam’s determined pursuit, respect had grown into something more personal until she’d thought she’d known the man well enough to make the most solemn promises of her life with him.

Obviously she hadn’t known him at all, because she’d had no idea that the main reason he’d wanted her was as a nanny for his children, with the added bonus of convenient sex. Of course she knew that few couples these days waited until they were married before sleeping together. In their case, circumstances had played a major part in preventing that happening. Her flat was furnished with an unromantically small bed, and she’d been far too aware of all their colleagues surrounding them to contemplate making love there. And as for any intimacy taking place in Liam’s house, she was old-fashioned enough to feel uncomfortable about sleeping with him in his bed before they were married, because his children were in the house.

It was a decidedly chilling thought that if she hadn’t had such scruples, he might not even have thought of offering marriage at all.

An hour and a long hot shower later, the sick feeling had abated a little but she still felt strangely hollow inside with a heavy ache around her heart.

One day she’d probably be able to laugh when she remembered the expression on Liam’s face when she’d stepped out from behind the plastic flowers. Ellie and Jamie’s goldfish—the only pet Liam would let his children have because it required the least effort on his part—had gaped at her just like that last weekend.

The doorbell rang, telling her there was someone calling her from the main door of the house, but she didn’t bother buzzing down on the intercom to find out who it was. Her windows weren’t visible from the front so no one would know she was there.

Anyway, there wasn’t anyone she wanted to see, so there was no point in answering.

At least she could be certain that it wasn’t Liam, she thought with a flash of satisfaction as she finally managed to squash her wedding dress tightly enough into the plastic bag to secure some string around the neck of it.

She suffered a momentary pang when she remembered the first time she’d tried the dress on and had turned to look at herself in the panoramic wall of mirrors.

It hadn’t been in the least bit what she’d been looking for—the classic winter white suit that Liam had suggested, so that she’d be able to wear it afterwards and get her money’s worth out of it.

This dress had been the absolute embodiment of every romantic dream she’d ever had. She hadn’t even reached her teens when she’d known that, whatever she achieved in her eventual career, her ultimate goal was to find the man of her dreams and build the close, loving family she’d always wanted.

There were no frills or flounces to detract from the classic simplicity of the fitted bodice or the full-length elegant sleeves and the layer upon layer of sheer silk organza that would caress her body and float behind her in a slow-motion dream as she walked towards her groom.

She straightened up from her self-imposed task and caught sight of herself in the tri-fold mirror on the top of her chest of drawers. She pulled a wry smile at the picture she made, with her face devoid of any trace of make-up and her toffee-coloured hair standing out at odd spiky angles after the rough towelling she’d given it after her shower.

‘Not quite the typical picture of the eager bride on the eve of her wedding,’ she murmured, and saw her lip quiver as she drew in a shaky breath.

‘Don’t you dare!’ she threatened the figure in the mirror with a glare from eyes that were more green than blue in the lamplight. ‘Not one single tear, do you hear me? He’s not worth it!’

There was another tap on the door. A different rhythm this time, and she sighed as she wondered who it was. While Liam was unlikely to turn up to apologise, he probably wanted to tell her what he thought of her for making such a scene. He’d certainly been mortified when she’d told him what she thought of him…and in front of so many members of staff, too!

Unfortunately, unless something juicier happened in the meantime, by the time she returned to work the hospital grapevine would probably have blown everything all out of proportion and she would be sharing equally in the notoriety.

Still, that was better than the alternative. It might have been years before she discovered just what sort of man she’d married, by which time she’d probably have been too old to have the baby she’d always wanted.

The knock came again, sharper and more determined, and she had a feeling that, unlike her last visitor, they weren’t going to give up. She was going to have to speak to them to make them go away, even if it was Liam. She certainly didn’t have to let anyone come into the flat, because she just wasn’t in the mood for company.

She was already speaking as she released the catch, determined to send her visitor away as she stuck just her head around the edge of the door.

‘Look, I’m sorry to be unsociable, but if you don’t mind, I’d rather not—Jake? What are you doing here?’

He was the very last person she’d expected to see standing there and the only one who could actually make the whole situation worse. She’d known from the first day he’d introduced her to Liam that the two men had known each other for years, but she had believed that since she’d come to work in his department at least she and Jake had become friends. It actually hurt that he’d thought so little about her feelings that he hadn’t told her about Liam’s lies.

‘How did you get in?’ she snapped. ‘I didn’t buzz down to release the lock on the front door.’

‘I know. That’s why I let myself in.’ He held up a familiar key. ‘I used to live here, remember?’

Yes, she remembered. She’d loved it when he’d used to live right next door to her…that there had been just a single wall separating her bed from the sexiest man she’d ever met. She’d been devastated when, without a word of warning, he’d suddenly bought a prestigious flat in a recently completed development on the other side of the hospital and moved out. OK, anyone could see that his new place was much nicer than this one, but she’d thought he’d enjoyed the friendly atmosphere here as much as she did.

‘What are you doing here?’ she demanded bluntly, her feelings less than friendly now.

‘You wouldn’t answer your door when Karen knocked earlier, and she was worried about you. We both were.’