The Texan's Happily-Ever-After

“I suppose that’s so. Your husband was a hero. His memory is bigger than life, so there’s no room to have a romantic dream again.”

“How do you understand that so well?”

“I’ve been around.”

Sometimes Shep’s attitude was too enigmatic, and she found herself wanting to dig down to deeper levels. So she asked a question that had been niggling at her for a long while. “If you wanted a family so badly, why didn’t you get married?”

“Because having a family didn’t depend on me marrying.”

“That’s not an answer,” she protested softly, wanting to step closer to him, and yet afraid of feelings that were starting to tickle her heart. So afraid, she wanted to run.

He seemed to have an inside battle with himself, then finally said, “I don’t trust women easily. I have good reasons to believe they leave when the going gets tough. Or they stay for the wrong reasons.”

“The wrong reasons?”

“Yeah. Things like money. Fancy cars. A house in the best neighborhood in town.”

So he’d gotten burned by a woman who had wanted what he could provide for her? Or had the trust issues started much earlier than that?

“Everyone’s got baggage, Shep. It’s what we do with it that matters.”

When he angled toward her, she wasn’t sure what was going to happen next. She was a bit surprised when he took hold of a lock of her hair and let it flutter through his fingers. “You’re a captivating woman, Raina. Do you know that?”

“No,” she said seriously. “Each day that passes I figure out more about myself.”

“What did you figure out today?” He let his hand drop and she was sorry when he did.

“I figured out that mucking out a stall is as good an exercise as I can get in a gym. And that little boys always have a next question, even when you think you’ve answered them all.”

He chuckled. “Isn’t that the truth?”

He looked as if he wanted to kiss her. To her amazement, she wanted him to do it. But why—so she could feel like a desirable woman once more? So she could really start living again? So she could wipe out some terrible memories and replace them with sparkling new ones?

Whatever the reason, it didn’t matter, because Shep took a step back. “We’d better get up to lunch before there isn’t any. Those boys have big appetites after doing chores.”

Shep had let her down easy. They’d gone back to friendly. His trust issues and her past could be hurdles that might prevent even a meaningful friendship from beginning.

What had gotten into him?

Shep gave his horse a nudge up a small hill, watching his sons in front of him as they did the same. Raina rode between Joey and Roy, talking to them as they bounced along.

Shep rarely discussed his background or his breakup with Belinda. Only with Cruz now and then. Granted, he hadn’t given Raina much, but he’d said more than enough. He wanted to forget Belinda’s gold-digging motivation for getting engaged to him…the indifference to children she’d kept well-hidden. He needed to forget that kid who’d gone through life without an adult to really care about him. He longed to forget landing in jail at the age of fourteen. He’d never tell Raina Greystone Gibson that story.

He’d been so rebellious back then. He’d hated his foster parents and their neglect. Not only of him, but of Cruz, too. Cruz had been younger, more vulnerable, not as experienced as Shep about the ins and outs of the system. Shep had felt he had to look out for him. But in protecting Cruz, he’d broken the law.

No matter their foster parents had left them alone for the weekend. No matter Cruz had taken ill and had a raging fever. No matter Shep hadn’t known what to do except hotwire that old truck and take Cruz to the closest E.R.

The chief of police had thrown him into that dirty jail cell and not cared a whit. If it hadn’t been for Matt Forester rescuing them, Shep wasn’t sure where he or Cruz would be today. Maybe in prison. Maybe on the streets.

Nope. He’d never tell Raina about that chunk of his life. She’d never understand the desperation that had driven him to rebel against authority figures for his sake as well as Cruz’s.

He’d sensed that same defiant spirit in Joey and suspected it had developed while he was in foster care.

The brothers had had loving, caring parents until they’d been killed. With no relatives to take care of them, they’d been thrust into the system. Then five, Joey had acted out, and his aggressive behavior had made placement even harder. They’d been through two foster couples before Shep had decided to take them.

He believed there were three secrets to turning kids around. Matt Forester had taught them to Shep and Cruz. You gave children safety. You gave them love. And you gave them a reason to trust you. If Shep could accomplish that, Joey, Roy and Manuel would be on their way to being confident and finding a future that fit them.

Breaking Shep’s consideration of his past and present, Joey turned around and called, “Can we show Dr. Gibson Red Creek?”

“Do you remember how to get there?”

“Yep. We go right at the bottom of this hill.”

“Lead the way.”

Joey grinned and pushed his fist up into the air, as if he’d just been given a gift. The gift of confidence, Shep hoped, as he urged his horse to catch up to Raina’s.

“They’re good riders for their age,” she remarked as the two boys trotted ahead.

“You’re pretty good yourself.”

“I must have inherited good riding genes from my ancestors who roamed the plains.”

He couldn’t tell if she was being serious or tongue-in-cheek. “You said your heritage meant a lot to your dad. Did it mean a lot to you?”

“That’s not an easy question.”

“Tell me,” he said, surprising himself. Usually when conversations with women got into sticky waters, he swam in the opposite direction. But he wanted to know more about Raina, wanted to uncover everything she kept hidden deep in her soul.

“Is it a long way to the creek?” she asked with a wry smile.

“Long enough that if you haven’t ridden for a while you’re going to be sore tomorrow.”

“I guess I’d better soak in a hot tub tonight.”

“It wouldn’t hurt.” He suddenly had visions of her sinking into a tub full of bubbles. But before she slid into those bubbles—

He had to quit imagining her in something less than a blouse and jeans.

When she canvassed his face, he wondered what she saw. He could hide quite a bit with his Stetson. Every cowboy knew how. But they were riding in the sun, and the shadows from his brim didn’t hide everything. Could she see his interest in her was physically motivated? Since Belinda’s rejection of a future he held dear, all he’d looked for from a woman was physical satisfaction.

He and Raina were so blasted different. The ways were too numerous to count. So why was he here? And why was she here?

Curiosity, pure and simple.

She was still studying him when he said, “You changed the subject.”

“You helped it along.”