He needed noise, the shrill, rattling chaos his kids normally provided free of charge to keep his mind off an encounter that hadn’t amounted to much of anything. Miranda was too young and too beautiful to find him of interest. Unless he could manage to get a particularly heinous stain on his clothing just before he met up with her again.
“Hi, Dad!”
His wish for distraction was granted, the silence scuttled as Kali did the bunny hop past his chair, her dark brown ponytails—doggy ears?—he never could keep those straight—bouncing. Or maybe this was Kori. Even after seven years of practice, he still sometimes had trouble telling them apart. If they stood perfectly still, shoulder to shoulder, right in front of him, he could do it in a snap. But when in motion, as they usually were, or when he saw one without the other—like now—well, it wasn’t so easy. Since Angie died, they seemed to find comfort in looking as much alike as possible and Nate couldn’t recall the last time he’d seen them dressed in anything except matching outfits. He probably ought to do something about that. Suggest they wear matching outfits in different colors, maybe. Or stand still more often.
“What’s for breakfast?” She braced her feet on the black-and-white tile and tugged at the refrigerator door, opening it with a tremendous—mainly unnecessary—show of effort. “How ’bout we have your famous pancakes?”
Dad’s famous pancakes was family code for going out to breakfast. Angie had made a joke about the fact that anytime she suggested he cook, he suggested they go out to eat. The kids loved to tease him, made up all kinds of fictitious stories about his ineptitude in all matters domestic. He’d always played along because it made them laugh and he’d never felt any particular need to apologize for not knowing how to do the things Angie did so well. But suddenly he felt inadequate, as if his children might have to suffer through years on a psychiatrist’s couch because he didn’t know how to make pancakes. “I can fix you some toast,” he offered, taking a bite out of his own. “Pretty tasty.”
Kali—he was almost positive it was Kali and not Kori—looked at him with eyes like his own, but set into her mother’s heart-shaped face, with a handful of Angie’s freckles scattered across her pert little nose. “No, thank you,” she said, and turned back to studying the contents of the fridge. “Can I have a Popsicle, please?”
He knew sugar was probably the worst thing for a seven-year-old at this time of day. Or later, for that matter. On the other hand, she had said please. “Sure,” he answered, not seeing the harm. “Why not?”
Her smile, too, reminded him of Angie, in all its crinkly cuteness. But then, except for their eyes, his little daughters were their mother made over. Dark, brown hair, rusty freckles, sassy attitude, all born in them as if Mother Nature had wanted to ensure Angie wouldn’t be forgotten.
As if that were ever a possibility.
He watched Angie’s child assess the problem of retrieving the requested Popsicle. Chin up, she reached for the handle of the side-by-side freezer, approaching it as if she’d need eighty pounds of heft in order to pry it open. Nate was tempted to get up to help, but knew from experience she’d rather do it on her own. The door popped open easily, obviously a pleasant surprise, and she smiled while plunging her hand into the box of Popsicles and coming out with the treat successfully in her grasp. She closed the freezer door with her hip and bounced happily over to the table, where she pulled out a chair and sat down, apparently unconcerned about having left the refrigerator door wide-open.
He got up and closed it, warming up his coffee—again—before returning to his place at the table. He smiled across at her as she licked the orange ice and she smiled back. There was something different about her this morning. Her hair was pulled into two neat ponytails—doggy ears, he decided, was what Angie had called that particular hairstyle—which were each tied with two overlapping ribbons, one blue, one yellow. She was dressed in yellow shorts and a blue-and-yellow-striped T-shirt. A matching outfit. Hmm. “You look nice this morning,” he commented, wondering how she’d gotten her hair so neat.
“Thanks,” she said, her mouth full of Popsicle. “Cate did it for me. She’s doing Kori’s now.”
Aha. This was Kali. He should have trusted his instincts. But then the oddity of what she’d said registered. “Cate fixed your hair? This morning?”
Kali nodded, apparently seeing nothing unusual in the idea that her sister was up before…he glanced at the clock on the kitchen wall…nine-thirty—a.m.
“Did you wake her up?” he asked.
“Nooooo.” Kali stretched out the word, turning it into an I’m-not-stupid, Dad statement. “She’s got a date.”
“Oh,” Nate said, then frowned. “She isn’t old enough to date.”
Kali shrugged and Kori came into the kitchen, identical to her twin in every detail, right down to the coordinating ribbons in her hair. Nate decided he would definitely give some thought to suggestions he could make about emphasizing their individuality. “Hey,” she said. “Where’d you get a Popsicle?”
“From the freezer.”
Kori looked expectantly at Nate. “She’s got a Popsicle.”
“He said I could have it.” Kali gave the ice a smug swipe with her tongue.
“Dad!” Kori’s tone was egregiously offended. “How come she gets a Popsicle?”
“Because she asked?” Nate suggested, his mood perked by the level of distraction now percolating in the room.
“Can I have one?”
“Yes, you may have one.”
Kori’s smile flashed like neon and he was suddenly aware of a strange mix of color on her teeth. “What’s wrong with your teeth?” he asked, leaning forward for a better look.
“Don’t worry, Pops,” she said, sounding a lot like her older sister. “It’s just wax. Doesn’t it look like I have braces on?”
Before he could comment that it looked like just what it was—thin strips of green and pink orthodontic wax stuck across her front teeth—Cate walked in. She’d gotten tall over the last few months, and looked older even than she had yesterday. That could, of course, be the punk-funk style she’d been perfecting over the past couple of years. Her hair—today—was cranberry red with banana and blueberry streaks. At least she was sticking with healthy-fruit colors, he thought. She had a ring—fake, thankfully, as Angie had established a firm rule about no permanent holes in places where nature hadn’t seen fit to put one in the first place—clipped on one eyebrow and a silver stud, magnetically attached—he knew because he’d insisted she show him—at her navel. He would have preferred that the navel jewelry wasn’t visible, but at least her fringed crop top covered all of her except a three-inch band of skin at her waist.
Nate didn’t like her showing any skin, but Angie had warned him not to fuss about the way the kids dressed. She’d told him fashion was a subjective statement and he did not want to set himself up as the arbiter of what they wore. That, she’d told him, would result in endless, futile arguments over what was relatively unimportant. They were great kids, good students who had to wear school uniforms for the nine months they were in class, and should be allowed to dress the way they wanted during the summers. With, of course, a few nonnegotiable rules. No low-cut necklines. No see-through clothing unless something opaque was worn underneath. No piercings. No tattoos. No shorts or skirt lengths higher than midthigh. No more than three inches of midriff showing at any time. This morning, Cate met the three-inch rule and so Nate bit his tongue and gave her a smile. “Good morning, Sunshine,” he greeted her.
“Good morning, Dad.” She came straight over, looped her arms around his neck and kissed him on the cheek. A diversionary action, probably. But it worked.
“What got you up and going so early this morning?”
She moved to the refrigerator, sweeping the Popsicle twins with a glance, which changed her direction, sending her to the sink where she wet one corner of a towel and returned to the table to wipe identical Popsicle-streaked mouths. “Is that, like, all you could find for breakfast?” she asked, her tone suggesting someone should have been paying more attention. “Don’t you want, like, some cereal or something?”
Nate felt a sharp stab of guilt for her concern, knew Angie would never forgive him if he let Cate take on the maternal role in the family. The trouble was, he didn’t quite know how to stop her. Cate was a force unto herself, and despite her punk-rock style and the way she inserted like into practically every sentence, she was something of an old-fashioned girl. “I’ll get it, Dad,” she said when he made a move to rise. “You can finish your paper. They’re, like, old enough to fix their own breakfast.”
“Kali mentioned you had a date,” he said, rising to fetch the cereal despite her protest, hoping to save her from doing it. But she was, of course, a step ahead of him and already had the cereal box in her hand. Which meant he could, at least, get the bowls. “Funny thing is, I don’t remember your thirtieth birthday, and I’m pretty sure I said you weren’t allowed to date before then.”
She rolled her blue-green eyes, his mother’s eyes, a striking combination with her brightly colored hair. “I’m going with Ariel and her mom to the mall, Dad. I told you that, like, yesterday.”
He tried to remember, but a lot had happened since yesterday, and meeting Miranda seemed to have burned up a whole bunch of his memory cells. “You did?”
She lifted her eyebrows, resembling for a moment a badly colorized version of Angie. “Like, duh,” she said.
He set the cereal bowls on the table in front of the twins, who ignored both bowls and cereal box in favor of their frozen Sugar Pops, and resumed his seat. He was trying to phrase a courteous but firm objection to Cate’s attitude and her, like, plans, when Will came in, looking like something the cat had dragged out of the trash. If his twin sister’s style was punk, Will’s was grunge. His jeans were loose and baggy and Nate thought his son must have somehow outwitted gravity just to keep them from falling around his ankles. He had on a shirt that even a vagrant would have wanted to give away and his hair—although untouched by the wild witches of fruity colors—stuck up in odd peaks and valleys and appeared for all the world as if he’d stuck his finger into a light socket just before coming downstairs.
“Morning,” he mumbled, because lately his voice squeaked more often than not and he’d taken to covering the embarrassing unevenness by barely moving his lips.
“Want a Popsicle, Will?”
Kori and Kali adored their big brother, despite his appearance, and their affection spilled out in big smiles. Nate noted the orthodontic wax—Kali had some on her teeth, too—was now a brownish color, stained by the orange pops.
“Yeah.” Kori seconded Kali’s invitation. “Dad said we could eat Popsicles for breakfast.”
Will frowned and put a hand to his forehead, possibly shading his eyes from the wattage of their smiles. “What have you got on your teeth?” he wanted to know.
“Fake braces,” Kori announced proudly.
“Cate helped us put them on,” said Kali. “Don’t they look real? Just like yours and Cate’s.”
“That’s bogus,” Will replied. Which could have meant great or awful. Nate didn’t really care to know which.
Folding the paper into thirds, he laid it on the table and surveyed his children. Maybe he’d been too quick to wish away the morning quiet.
“Well,” he said cheerfully, “you’re all up remarkably early this morning. Guess you’re excited about our plans for today, huh?”
“Huh?” Will looked at Nate as if he were a talking frog.
“What plans?” Cate asked, obviously horrified at the idea of a family outing.