Lonetree Ranchers: Colt

The weight of guilt settling over Kaylee’s shoulders couldn’t possibly have felt heavier. As much as she disliked having to admit it, she had been unfair to both Colt and Amber by keeping her secret. Kaylee knew beyond a shadow of doubt that no matter how much he wanted to forget their night together had ever happened, he would have loved and cared for his child from the very moment he learned of her existence.

Tears filled Kaylee’s eyes. She’d kept Colt from knowing about his child because of her own hurt feelings and disillusion. In the process, she’d deprived Amber of a daddy who cared deeply for her.

“What do you say, Kaylee?” he asked, wiping a tear from her cheek with his thumb. “Will you and Amber came home with me to the Lonetree?”

She gazed up at the man she’d once loved with all her heart and soul. He was right. She did owe him and Amber the time together. But it was going to take everything she had in her to keep her wits about her while she was with him. If she didn’t, she wasn’t sure she wouldn’t end up falling under his magnetic spell all over again. And that was something she couldn’t allow herself to do. Her survival depended on it.

“I can’t believe I’m actually going to say this,” she finally said, feeling her insides shake like a bowl full of Jell-O.

“You’ll go?” he asked hopefully.

Taking a deep breath, Kaylee felt as if she was stepping out onto a tight rope with no safety net below. “Yes, we’ll go to the Lonetree with you. But only until you get ready to leave for the season finals. Amber and I won’t be going to Las Vegas with you.”

“We’ll see about that.”

The smile he sent her way curled her toes and already had her regretting her decision to go to the Lonetree Ranch with him for the next two months.

Three

“Dammit all,” Colt muttered, cursing the fact that he still couldn’t use his left arm. Not being able to use both hands made installing Amber’s car seat in his truck extremely difficult.

“Problems?” Kaylee asked.

Turning, he watched her walk toward him. She held Amber in her arms.

“I could use another hand getting this car seat secured,” he said, hating that he looked helpless and inadequate in front of her.

Kaylee set Amber on her feet. “Stay right here, sweetie, while Mommy helps Colt with your seat.”

“Daddy,” he said firmly. “I’m her daddy, Kaylee.”

She stared up at him a moment before she gave a quick nod. “I’m going to help your…daddy, Amber.”

Her reluctance to acknowledge him as Amber’s father cut like a knife, but Colt ignored it. Once they got to the Lonetree they’d have plenty of time to sort things out and, hopefully, to rebuild the friendship they’d once shared. It would make their raising Amber together a whole hell of a lot easier.

A small sound caught Colt’s attention. Glancing down, he noticed his daughter curiously watching him. But the moment she saw him look at her, she ducked behind Kaylee’s leg.

“How long do you think it will take for her to be comfortable with me?” he asked, wondering the same thing about Kaylee. Would she ever again be at ease when she was around him?

“I’m not sure.” She stared at him for endless seconds before she added, “This is new territory for all of us. It’s going to take time.”

Colt knew she was referring more to herself than their daughter. Deciding not to push for more, he reached into the truck to position the car seat. “Are you about ready to leave? I’d like to get on the road. We have a long drive and I’d like to get as far as we can before we stop for the night.”

“Stop?”

When she turned to look at him, Kaylee’s breast brushed his arm. His mouth went as dry as a pile of sawdust. “I—” he had to stop to clear his throat “—thought it would probably be best for Amber if we broke the trip into two days.”

It took everything Colt had in him not to groan out loud when Kaylee’s tongue darted out to moisten her perfect coral lips. “You’re probably right,” she finally answered. Backing away from him, she picked up Amber and started toward the stairs leading to the second floor of the apartment building. “I’ll go check to make sure we brought all of the luggage down and grab Amber’s bag of toys.”

Colt waited until Kaylee climbed the steps and disappeared into her apartment before he finally managed to take another breath. Glancing at his scuffed boots, he kicked a pebble and watched it skitter across the asphalt parking lot. He hated that he’d had to resort to making her feel guilty to get her to go to the Lonetree with him. But, dammit, he needed time to get to know Amber, time to work out some kind of shared custody agreement, and time to make amends with Kaylee for what had happened three years ago.

He ran his hand around the back of his neck in an effort to ease some of the tension that had knotted his muscles since Saturday afternoon and his discovery that he’d fathered a child. How was he ever going to convince Kaylee that she wasn’t the reason he’d walked away that morning? How was he going to explain that he’d felt as if he’d betrayed Mitch’s friendship? And how was he going to make her understand that he’d been so ashamed of his actions, he hadn’t been able to face himself, let alone face her?

“If they gave medals for screwing up, you’d win hands down, Wakefield,” he muttered disgustedly.

He wasn’t quite sure how to go about doing it, but he was determined to straighten everything out with Kaylee. He had to. His, hers and Amber’s future happiness depended on it.

“Out, Mommy, out,” Amber said, impatiently tugging on the harness holding her in the car seat.

“Just a few more minutes, sweetie,” Kaylee answered as she watched Colt enter the motel lobby. “Colt…your daddy is going to get a couple of rooms for us to sleep in tonight.”

Amber blinked and nodded her head. “Not seepy.”

“I know you’re not sleepy right now,” Kaylee said, smiling. “But you will be later.”

She absently watched Colt as he talked to the desk clerk. He’d decided to stop in Hays, Kansas, for the night even though it was early and they could have driven for several more hours. His excuse had been that he didn’t want the trip to be too tiring for Amber. But Kaylee suspected his collarbone bothered him. She also knew that if that was the case, he’d never admit it. For Colt and most of the other cowboys on the PBR and professional rodeo circuits, admitting any kind of weakness was unheard of.

“Did you get rooms on the ground floor or the second level?” Kaylee asked when he got back into the truck.

“Ground floor.” He put the truck into gear. “I figured it would be easier.”

She didn’t have to ask what he meant. She already knew. He intended to carry what few bags they took to their rooms himself, just as he’d insisted on carrying all of her luggage from the apartment to his truck this morning. Unable to use his left arm, it had taken him several trips to get everything downstairs, but he wouldn’t hear of her helping.

“I’ll carry our bag to mine and Amber’s room,” she said firmly when he pulled into a parking space at the side of the stucco building.

“Our room.”

Kaylee stopped unbuckling Amber’s shoulder harness to stare at him. “You rented only one room?”

“Yep.”

Her heart hammered against her rib cage. “There weren’t any more available?”

“I don’t know how many they had available,” he answered, sounding so darned unconcerned she wanted to throttle him. “I didn’t ask.”

When he moved to get out of the truck, she took hold of his arm to stop him. “You want to give me a reason for not getting the second room?” she asked, doing her best to keep her voice level.

The feel of Colt’s rock-hard muscles beneath his red shirt sent a tingle arrowing up her arm. She immediately let go of his bicep to rub her palm on her jeans-clad thigh.

For the first time since getting back into the truck, Colt looked uncertain. “I don’t like having to admit this, but I’m probably going to need your help tonight and in the morning.”

“With your sling?” Kaylee asked, surprised that he’d admit needing assistance with anything. Because of her training she knew he probably did have trouble trying to put the restraint on with one hand, but she could help him without them spending the night in the same room.

He nodded. “I have a hard time getting it adjusted.” He looked thoroughly disgusted. “Trying to get it comfortable is a pain in the—”

Kaylee loudly cleared her throat and nodded toward Amber. “She picks up certain words faster than others.”

His charming grin sent a shiver straight up her spine. “I was going to say, it’s a pain in the butt.”