Until Now

“I suspect that’ll suit you just fine anyway,” she added in a voice that was almost a whisper.

“Excuse me?”

With a huge sense of relief, Tamara started to recognize her old neighborhood. “Oh, thank God. We’re almost there.”

“Can’t wait to get away from me,” Marshall commented, sounding as though he was speaking to himself. “I guess I should be offended.”

Tamara didn’t respond, just sipped her coffee. She wished she could be out of the car already.

Away from Marshall.

Maybe it was better that she had no recollection of last night. Even if all she and Marshall had done last night was fool around a little, it was still too much for her liking. Not knowing the details, she could pretend that nothing had happened.

Sure, it wasn’t the most mature way to look at things, but she didn’t particularly feel like being an adult about this. Because as she neared Callie and Nigel’s house, she was wondering how on earth she was going to explain herself to her son and to her friends.

Minutes later, Marshall slowed and turned into the driveway of Callie and Nigel’s home and pulled up behind Tamara’s car. Yesterday, between the wedding and the reception, Tamara had followed Callie to the house when she’d brought the boys to the sitter, and they had gone to the reception hall in one car. Tamara was extremely grateful she’d had the foresight to do that, which saved her from having to head back to the reception hall this morning.

As Marshall put the car into Park, Tamara began to undo the seat belt immediately. But as she reached to open the door with her other hand, Marshall took her gently by the wrist.

She looked at him. “What are you doing?”

“You don’t want to ask me what happened last night? You don’t want to know?” he said as he released her wrist.

Tamara swallowed. She wanted to know, but then again she didn’t want to know. Her chest tightened with anxiety even while her stomach fluttered with a different sensation.

“Whatever happened, I think it’s best that we for—”

“Forget it. Fine.”

Marshall’s response gave Tamara pause. Guilt made her stomach tense. She was being harsh with him, and he looked as though he had no clue why.

It was time she fill him in. “You dated my cousin,” she told him. “That’s how I know all about you. I’m not passing judgment out of thin air.”

Marshall’s eyes narrowed with confusion. “What?”

“Twelve years ago—thirteen, actually—you dated my cousin, and you broke her heart. Gloria Miller?” she added, when he continued to seem clueless. “You chased her, you got what you wanted and then you dumped her. She was crushed. And she wasn’t the only woman you used and abused. There were plenty. Your reputation...it was pretty infamous.”

Understanding filled Marshall’s eyes. “Ahh, so that explains your attitude.” He paused. “Then the kiss last night...?”

“Was a bit of payback. I was toying with you. Letting you know that you can’t get your way with every woman. The kiss was about...teaching you a lesson.” Tamara quickly looked downward, shame coming over her. Some lesson that had been.

“At least now I know why you think ill of me. But clearly, whatever lesson you wanted to teach me didn’t go exactly as planned.”

Tamara whipped her gaze to his. “I realize that! You don’t have to rub it in.”

Several seconds passed, seconds that seemed like hours. Marshall stared at her, and Tamara held his gaze, determined not to let her embarrassment get to her.

“I really do need to get inside.”

“And here I thought we’d made some sort of connection last night. I mean, that kiss didn’t feel like payback...”

“You need me to spell it out? I’m not interested. Not in a guy like you.”

“Ouch.”

“Okay,” Tamara said, breathing out harshly. “This has gone in a direction I never intended. Please, let’s just forget all of it. I apologize for being offensive. Obviously things got to a certain level between us last night and I’m upset about that. And now I keep putting my foot in my mouth. I’m embarrassed enough.”

“I’m not stopping you from leaving,” Marshall said.

“Thank you.” Tamara opened the door.

But as she was stepping out the car, Marshall said, “Though you might want to know that you don’t need to be embarrassed. At least not about what did or did not happen last night.”

Tamara halted but didn’t look at him.

“I have no clue how you got naked, because when I put you in my spare bedroom, you had your dress on. You must have taken it off some time in the night.”

Tamara spun around and faced him, her breaths coming rapidly.

“A beautiful woman like you—would I have wanted to help you out of your dress? Sure, if you had been conscious and willing. But you were out cold, and I put you in the spare bed so that you could get some rest and sleep it off.”

Tamara’s eyes widened as she searched his face. “You’re saying that we never—”

“No.” His eyes held hers for a long moment. “Not that I wouldn’t have been willing,” he added, and the words alone made her feel flushed. “But since you practically passed out in my arms when you came out of the restroom, and because I didn’t want to bother Callie or Nigel with the situation—or to have you go home in that state and have your son see you—I took you to my place.”

Tamara was stunned; she had no clue what to say. Not only had he not taken advantage of her, he’d actually been thinking of her son—something she greatly appreciated.

“Never in my life have I had to take advantage of a woman to get her into my bed, and I’m not about to start now.”

“You—you never took off my dress?” How had she gotten naked, then? She must have awoken, perhaps because she was hot. Yes, she had memories of being hot. She must have taken off her own dress and had no recollection of it.

“I guess you’ll believe what you want to believe,” Marshall said. “But, Tamara, the truth is that I didn’t touch you in an inappropriate way. As amusing as it was to watch you squirm, believing that we’d made love, I wanted to make sure that you knew nothing happened—since the idea of sharing my bed bothers you that much.”

“I—I’m sorry.” It was the only thing Tamara could say, even though she knew the words wouldn’t be enough. “I...I just... I thought... I really am sorry.”

She’d been flustered. Out of her element. On edge around Marshall.

“Nigel is my best friend,” Marshall explained. “I told him last night I was going to take you home, look out for you. And even if you think I wouldn’t care about taking advantage of you, there’s no way that I would disrespect Nigel and the trust he placed in me. You can take that to the bank.”

Tamara felt like a heel. “Like I said, I’m sorry. I don’t get drunk, and I still don’t understand what happened. Waking up in a strange bed had me out of sorts. So, I apologize for my attitude. And thank you,” she added faintly.

“Pardon me?”

Tamara couldn’t meet Marshall’s eyes. If she never had to see him again, it would be too soon. Her humiliation was at an all-time high.

She drew in a deep breath and faced him. Hadn’t she dealt with much worse in her life? “Thank you,” she said more firmly, meaning it. “Thank you for looking out for me last night when I couldn’t do it myself.”

“You’re welcome. And a word of advice? Lay off the alcohol.”