Freefall to Desire

On the other end of the line, Alex’s breath caught in his chest. “Yet your feelings aren’t the same?” he suggested.

A few seconds passed—seconds in which Alex didn’t breath. Then Brianne said the words that burst his bubble of hope.

“No, it’s not that my feelings have changed. It’s that I’m scared.”

Alex was angry with himself. Angry that even for a smidgen of a second he had entertained the idea that Brianne was over Carter. A full year after Carter’s disappearance, Brianne had been hanging on to the hope that he would return. Three years later, she was still single. Obviously she was still in love with him—even if he was unworthy of that love.

“I know you’re scared,” Alex said. “I am, too. I mean, we don’t know what we’re dealing with.”

“Exactly,” Brianne said softly. “Maybe the unknown is better.”

“Really?” Alex asked.

“No. Not really.” Brianne blew out a huff of air. “Those are my nerves talking.”

“You want to get together for breakfast or something?”

Alex suggested. “I’ve got to be at the store at ten, but we can meet quickly if you want.”

“No, I didn’t want to disturb you.”

“You’re not disturbing me.”

“It’s just…I think I need a bit more time to decide what I’m going to do.”

“And you don’t want me pressuring you until you’ve made your decision.”

“No, no. It’s not that.” Alex heard a sigh. “You must think me crazy.”

“Brianne, I’m the one who showed up at your door after us not talking for two years, and then I dropped a bombshell. Needing time to think things over is not crazy.”

“Thank you,” she said. And then, “I’m going to get something to eat myself. I’ll talk to you later, okay?”

“Sure.” Alex spoke calmly. But as he replaced the receiver, anxiety gripped his gut.

He needed Brianne to go with him to Florida.

It was the only way.

Brianne hadn’t planned on it, but she left her house two hours before she was scheduled to go to work and drove to Outdoor Gear, located in downtown Buffalo on Broadway. The store was close to the 33 Expressway, which would lead her right to the mall.

She had made her decision. If the amount of time she’d spent thinking about Carter since last night was any indication, she wouldn’t be at peace until she knew one way or another.

Still, as Brianne approached the store, she had a sense of unease. But she knew the unease wouldn’t dissipate by ignoring the situation.

Brianne slowed and signaled her intent to turn left. She looked out her driver’s-side window at the storefront for Outdoor Gear. In three years, she had not come to the sporting goods store that Carter and Alex had bought and run together. She hadn’t been able to, knowing that Carter would likely never make another appearance here.

So much had changed in twenty-four hours.

Just as it had changed in an instant three years earlier.

She turned left into the small parking lot, her pulse picking up speed as she parked her car beside Alex’s Mercedes. In a flash, she remembered Carter’s sleek, 7-series navy blue BMW that used to always be parked back here. Carter and Alex had enjoyed some good-humored bantering over which luxury car was truly the top of the line. Alex believed, hands down, that Mercedes made a better car. Carter argued that Mercedes were for old people and that BMWs were the perfect car for a hip, young male.

Brianne actually smiled as she remembered their ribbing and how they’d often gotten her involved to solve the dispute. Brianne had always sided with her man—though she’d secretly preferred the look of the Mercedes.

The happy memory came and went quickly as she exited her Ford Focus and walked to the store’s entrance. She felt oddly nervous. But why should she feel nervous? So what if she hadn’t been here in years?

It was like leaving a school and going back to visit. It always felt a little weird. Like you didn’t quite belong.

Brianne pulled open the front door, and the door chimes sang. There were a few customers in the store, and Alex was currently speaking with a man near the hockey equipment.

He saw her, and for the briefest of moments their eyes held. Then Brianne jerked her gaze away.

She was suddenly remembering the first time she’d entered this store four and a half years ago. It had been her goal at the time to get into better shape, to begin an exercise routine that consisted of walking and biking.

Alex had been the first one to catch her eye. And he’d smiled, bright and warm. But then Carter had appeared from somewhere off to her right, approaching her before Alex could.

And the rest was history.

Brianne glanced in Alex’s direction again. As though he sensed her gaze, he looked at her.

Brianne’s stomach fluttered, surprising her.

Obviously she had not just felt a zap of attraction for Alex.

It was remembering the first time she’d been in this store and had met Carter. The memory of that day was playing havoc with her emotions.

She perused the store as if she were shopping for something, and when Alex was finally free, he came toward her.

“Hey, Brianne.”

“I’ll do it,” she began without preamble. “I’ll work with you to help find Carter.”

Alex hesitated a moment, then said, “If you need more time to make your decision—”

“I don’t need more time,” Brianne interjected. “It was the only decision I could make. Because if Carter’s alive, he’s obviously suffered some trauma.” She paused. “We were engaged. I was months away from marrying him. About to take vows to love him and be there for him forever. So I…I have to be there for him now.”

“I’m glad,” Alex said.

Brianne noticed—not for the first time—just how attractive he was. At six foot four, she had always loved his height. She wondered if he were still single—if Carter’s disappearance had him stuck in the past, unable to move forward as she had been.

“So,” she began, and sighed. “What do we do next?”

“I say we head to Daytona and hit the ground running. It makes sense to head to the place where I saw him.”

“But he could be anywhere now. He could have been visiting Daytona for the event.”

“True,” Alex acknowledged. “But it seems like the best place to start. We can hit the racing circuit. We can also bring pics of Carter and ask if Dean knows him by another name.”