Filthy Beautiful Love

Splurging was coming on this trip in the first place – I wouldn’t waste the precious money I had on first class airfare or a fancy hotel room. Even though Becca had responded well to the treatment so far, there was no guarantee that she’d stay healthy, or that she wouldn’t need another round in a pricey treatment facility.

‘What’s wrong with the room? Not up to your high standards?’ I remark, crossing my arms in front of my chest.

He frowns. ‘Let me upgrade you. Take you somewhere proper,’ Colton says, his dark eyes finding mine again.

How dare he? He can’t waltz in here, interrupt my vacation and then insult where I’m staying. He doesn’t control everything. The urge to push him from the room and slam the door in his face is nearly overwhelming. I pull a deep breath into my lungs, just as he reads my uneasy expression and takes a step back.

‘Never mind. As long as you’re comfortable.’ He eyes the bed linens like he’s checking for bedbugs.

Asshole.

‘I am.’ Or at least I was until he arrived out of the blue and completely threw my emotions into a tailspin.

Pace crosses the room, pulls out the small chair from the desk and plops down. His frame dwarfs everything in our tiny efficiency. He looks out of place, but in a good way. ‘I didn’t realize you had a sister. Sexy obviously runs in the family.’ He throws a wink toward Becca.

‘We’re twins,’ Becca informs him.

We always looked a bit different, and now more than ever. With Becca’s hair growing back in, it just reaches the tops of her shoulders and she wears it wavy and messy. My hair falls like a thick curtain down my back and is as straight as an arrow. She’s also about fifteen pounds thinner than me. Chemo will do that to you.

‘Mmm,’ Pace growls, his eyes wandering between us. ‘I’ve always had a secret twin fantasy.’ The hungry look in his eyes is enough to bring a woman to her knees. Becca stands zero chance against his charms.

Colton steps closer to my side, his fists tightening as he shoots an evil glare toward Pace. ‘Don’t make me kill you as soon as we’ve landed. It would really dampen the trip.’

‘Don’t make me confiscate your balls. Now go talk to your woman,’ Pace challenges.

I open my mouth to correct him. I am no one’s woman, but my brain flashes back to that fateful night when Colton purchased me from the auction. I accepted the money–and spent a good chunk of it. Does that mean I still belong to him despite finding out he’s married?

I cursed the stupid contract, I cursed the man himself for holding my heart captive. That was never part of the plan.

When I meet his eyes again, he looks lost, broken, and it tugs at something deep inside me. As much anger as I felt discovering that he’d lied to me the entire time we were together, I still have feelings for him. I can’t just turn them off. Despite his obvious shortcomings, he helped my sister, and he made me feel alive. He was everything I never knew I wanted.

‘Can we go out into the hall and talk for a minute?’ Colton asks, his voice whisper soft.

‘Hear him out, kid. Do it for me,’ Pace says, dimples out in full force, like he knows they’re impossible to refuse. The jerk.

I swallow and give an imperceptible nod before following him into the hall. He flew halfway around the world; the least I could do was listen to his explanation. Maybe it will give me some much needed closure. Maybe I can get the answers I need to move on and also figure out where we stand with respect to the large chunk of money exchanged between us. He never collected on his end of the bargain after all, I am still a virgin.

Once we’re out in the hall, Colton stands before me, looking directly into my eyes. ‘So, that’s Becca, huh?’ He tips his head toward the door.

‘Yeah.’

‘She looks good – healthy, I mean.’

I nod. ‘Yeah, the treatment worked – so far. She goes in for another round in two weeks, but with everything that’s happened, it seemed like a good time to get away – for both of us.’ She and I have never done anything like this, but it was part of my plan to start actually living.

He nods. ‘I see.’

We’re silent for several seconds and Colton’s hand twitches like he wants to touch me, but he doesn’t. Thank God.

‘And would your running away to another country have anything to do with…Stella?’

I flinch involuntarily. I hate that he’s just said her name. It immediately conjures images of that day in the pool, when my whole little world shattered. In the country of Italy, her name should not exist.

‘Will you tell me the story?’ I ask.

‘Anything you want to know.’

‘Are you getting divorced?’

‘That’s up for debate.’’

‘Then I’m leaving.’ I turn for the door, my hand gripping the knob.

‘No. Stay. Please hear me out,’ Colton pleads, prying my fingers from the door handle.

His hand on my skin sends a flash of heat through me at the memory of what those hands can do. He’s still the only man who’s made me come. I shudder as though the memory singes some part of me.

I hear a wave of girly laughter behind the door. It warms me to hear Becca enjoying herself, and it grounds me in the moment. Turning to face Colton again, I draw a deep, calming breath. ‘Do you love her?’

‘No.’ His voice is sure, steady. ‘I never loved her like I should have.’

My shoulders relax just slightly. Even if my body wants to run, and my head is screaming at me to flee, my heart has grown attached to this man. And for better or worse, part of me needs to hear him out, to understand this messy situation I’ve found myself in. Maybe if I can make sense of it, then I can move on.

‘Please let me explain, that’s all I’m asking.’ He raises his palms in a placating gesture.

I’ve never seen him look so devastated and broken. Dark circles line his eyes and he hasn’t shaved in days. Even though I’ve agreed to hear him out, a wave of nausea washes through me. Am I prepared to handle whatever he’s about to tell me? I fasten one hand against the wall for support. ‘I just need a minute…’

He releases a heavy exhale and I swear what looks like regret washes over his features. ‘I will give you all the time you need, sweetness,’ he whispers.

The nickname against his lips presses like a weight onto my chest. My heart feels heavy, thudding dully against my ribcage.

Another fit of Becca’s giggles greet us from behind the door.

‘He’s probably trying to de-pants her,’ Colton says.

‘I don’t think she’d mind much.’

‘Should we check on our siblings while we’re giving you a minute?’

I nod. We might as well. I don’t think I’m ready to hear the entire sordid tale about how the man I was falling for is married and by the sounds of it, not necessarily planning to divorce. A stiff drink might help ease some of this ache in my chest too.

Back inside the cramped hotel room, Becca and Pace are standing near the open windows, deep in conversation. I’ve never seen her look so happy and chipper. She’s openly flirting and preening like a peacock, twirling a lock of hair around her finger and smiling up at him brightly. Our vacation is about to get a lot more interesting.

Realizing we’re back in the room, Becca turns to me. ‘Soph, did you know Pace spent a semester studying here in Rome? He’s going to take me sightseeing – show me all the best spots that aren’t in those travel guides we bought.’

So much for kicking Pace and Colton out. This was supposed to be a girl’s trip, but I won’t deny Becca anything, and I can tell she’d love to spend more time in Pace’s company. It’s that damn crooked grin and dimple of his that just beg you to come out and play.

‘How did you know where I was?’ I ask Colton.