Secret Passion

‘Yes,’ she grimaced.

He laughed softly, his eyes warm, the amusement remaining in his smile. ‘I’m not upset, Aura,’ he murmured thoughtfully. ‘Intrigued, perhaps, but certainly not upset.’

She stood up abruptly; the last thing she needed was a complication like this man in her life! ‘I’ve taken up enough of your time.’ She moved determinedly towards the door.

Somehow he was there before her, having crossed the room with a stealthy grace that was unnerving at the same time as his suddenly close proximity sent a shiver of awareness down her spine.

‘You haven’t taken anything I wasn’t willing to give,’ he told her softly.

Aura looked up at him with alarm, that alarm increasing at the unmistakable warmth in sensual green eyes. ‘I have to go,’ she insisted sharply.

He nodded slowly. ‘I’ll be in touch.’

Now what did he mean by that, she puzzled irritably all the way down in the lift and on the walk out to her car. The last thing, positively the last thing she needed, was for Adrian’s partner to become interested in her.

Unless the two men had discussed her, she worried on the drive back to the shop. James Ballantine didn’t seem the type of man to indulge in locker-room gossip, but that didn’t mean Adrian hadn’t told him about the obstinate woman he was dating who refused every move he made to share her bed. Maybe he had even challenged his partner to see if he could do any better with her!

She wouldn’t put that sort of challenge past the type of man Adrian had proved himself to be, but she was sure James Ballantine wasn’t like that. She was letting her insecurities of the past colour her judgement.

But no matter what conclusions she came to about James Ballantine, it didn’t alter the fact that Adrian had repaid her rejection of him by refusing to renew her lease, or that once Adrian returned to the office later today he might manage to convince his partner that he had acted that way for a good reason, and James Ballantine might just decide to go along with that decision …

It wasn’t the most relaxing day she had ever spent, expecting a furious Adrian Mayhew to appear in the shop at any moment, at the very least anticipating a telephone call from James Ballantine to tell her there was nothing he could do about renewing her lease.

Neither of those things happened. Each ring of the bell over the door as it opened brought in only customers, and the only two telephone calls she received were from other customers with queries. By five-thirty, as she and Jeanne, the middle-aged lady who helped her run the shop, closed up for the day, Aura’s nerves were frayed to breaking-point.

‘Everything all right?’ Jeanne took time out from the mad dash she always had at the end of her working day to get home and cook the dinner for her invalid husband and their three young children. ‘You seem very tense,’ she explained her concern.

Aura sighed. ‘It’s just been one of those days,’ she evaded; the other woman and her husband had enough trouble meeting their bills as it was, without worrying them with the fact that Jeanne might soon be out of a job because the shop was having to close. ‘I’m sure it will be better tomorrow.’ Oh God, she hoped so. If James Ballantine didn’t call her first thing tomorrow morning she was going to call him, and damn the fact that that was sure to make him angry straight away!

Once Jeanne had left to hurry to the nearby supermarket before it closed she paused while cashing up to look around the shop that had become her pride and joy. It was light and airy, the shelves well stocked and varied. It was hers, damn it, and she refused to lose it because Adrian didn’t like to hear the word no! She would take him to court over it if necessary—no, she wouldn’t do that, she admitted to herself dully. She wouldn’t do anything that would draw attention to herself, and claiming sexual harassment by her landlord would certainly do that!

But all the anger and frustration of her situation faded as soon as she looked at the gentle face of the woman waiting upstairs for her in the flat. No one, least of all she, was able to resist this delicately lovely woman’s vulnerability, Aura feeling protective as soon as she looked at the other woman.

‘Hello, Mummy.’ She greeted her mother softly so as not to startle her.

Vague brown eyes focused on her with effort as her mother looked up from the television set showing a popular children’s cartoon. ‘Is it that time already, dear?’ She frowned as she saw the till-roll and books in Aura’s hands.

‘Yes,’ she confirmed indulgently, kissing her mother on the cheek before glancing at the television screen. ‘Has the cat been put out for the night yet?’ she mused.

‘No, dear.’ Her mother patted her cheek. ‘And talking of cats, have you seen Marmaduke today?’

‘He came in with me and went straight for his food bowl in the kitchen,’ Aura assured her, knowing how her mother fretted about the wandering tomcat. ‘Just give me five minutes and I’ll get our dinner started.’

‘I’ll get it, shall I, dear?’ her mother offered, but her attention had already wandered back to the television programme.

Aura smiled as she went up to the next floor to her bedroom, knowing her mother would still be immersed in the cartoon—or another programme like it—when she went through the lounge in a few minutes on her way to the kitchen. Every night her mother offered to get dinner for them, and every night she either forgot or wandered off to do something else.

At only forty-five, with the sort of beauty that had only increased with the years, her mother had retreated into a world where pain didn’t touch her, where she saw only good in everything, because to see things any other way would be to see reality. It had been like this since Aura’s father died.

Her mother had never been a forceful personality, but the death of the man she loved had somehow pushed her into a world where she took responsibility for nothing, and where no one expected her to do so. When she wasn’t watching the childishly uncomplicated programmes on television she would just sit and daydream, and from the faraway tranquility of her expression when she did that Aura guessed her thoughts were as childishly unfettered by reality.

Shock, the doctors had diagnosed her condition, at the sudden death of Aura’s father. They had all predicted she would as quickly recover from the shock, that it was something that occasioanlly happened to the deeply grief-stricken. They had been wrong, and despite constant counselling, her mother still lived in that state where she knew the man she loved had gone, but where she preferred to think he had just briefly left their lives.

At times Aura felt her father’s loss so acutely she wanted to share her own pain with her mother, but as time passed and her mother continued to live in her world without pain the doctors had feared that the sudden jolt into awareness could result in permanent damage. Sometimes, as Aura watched her dreamily vague mother, she wondered if it weren’t already too late to do anything to help her.

Once she had changed into peach cotton trousers and a brown blouse, she went down to the kitchen, her mother, as she had predicted, still watching the television, having switched off the news in favour of a nature programme.

Aura didn’t know how her mother would react to the move if they had to make one. She didn’t seem aware of her surroundings most of the time, had made no comment when they moved here two years ago, and yet this flat was part of her mother’s security.

Her mother’s distracted, ‘I could have done it, dear,’ as they sat down to the dinner Aura had prepared, made her smile sadly.

Her mother had never been a forceful person, had always been content to go along with the will of the majority rather than argue her own point of view, but Aura did remember her as a woman whose complete happiness enveloped all around her; the way she was now, neither happiness nor despair touched her. It was heartbreaking for Aura to witness.

The fact that Adrian, when he had called for her here, had been unfailingly kind to her mother had only made her like him more; now she was sure that kindness had just been another part of his plan to persuade her into a deeper relationship with him.

Her sudden loss of appetite was due solely to Adrian Mayhew and what he was trying to do to her, and she refused her mother’s offer of helping her clear away, needing to be alone to try to work out what she would do if James Ballantine refused to reconsider renewing her lease. She would have to look for another property if that happened, and she wearily thought of the time it would take to find somewhere that was suitable. Why didn’t—who was her mother talking to? Oh God, she hadn’t started talking to herself too, had she!

Aura was hastily wiping her hands dry as she rushed into the lounge, entering the room just in time to see her mother inviting James Ballantine into the flat.

He looked over the top of her mother’s head at her flushed and dishevelled appearance, frowning at her suddenly fierce glare. ‘If I’ve called at an inconvenient time …?’

Any time would be inconvenient with him looking like that!

He ought to have a ‘Danger’ warning sewn onto the waistband of the faded denims he wore; the way they clung to his hips and thighs was positively indecent. He had no right to reveal how broad his chest was in the dark green shirt and black leather jacket, and he certainly had no right to have his hair falling rakishly over his forehead like that, ruffled by the gentle breeze outside!

Aura realised she had stopped breathing as soon as she saw him only because her starved lungs suddenly demanded air, her ragged breath audible as her mother moved to turn down the volume on the television set.

‘Not at all—Mr Ballantine, wasn’t it?’ Her mother gave him one of her vague smiles. ‘Aura has just finished clearing away. And I——’

‘Mummy,’ she warned as her mother picked up a book that lay open on the sofa.

‘—was just off to my room,’ she finished serenely as if Aura hadn’t spoken, dazzling James Balantine with another of her beautiful smiles before going up the stairs.

James Ballantine watched her go with vaguely disturbed eyes. ‘She’s very lovely,’ he said suddenly.

‘Yes,’ Aura snapped, suddenly in control again. OK, so out of the dark suit he had worn earlier today and wearing casual denims and a leather jacket instead, he looked devastating; that was no reason to forget that this man had to be here for a purpose, and she had to know what that purpose was. ‘Have you come to tell me——’

‘She seems a little—not quite of this world.’ He still gazed after her mother.

‘Yes,’ she bit out tautly. ‘Now would you——’

‘But so very beautiful,’ he said again dazedly, as if completely mesmerised.

‘Mr Ballantine——’

‘James,’ he corrected gruffly, crossing the room to her side in two strides. ‘Don’t expect me to be coherent when I’ve just seen what you’re going to look like in twenty years’ time,’ he murmured softly. ‘Aura …!’

She didn’t have time to prevent the contact as his head bent to hers and the mouth that she had classed as sensual on sight took possession of her. That was the only way to describe what happened to her, James not just claiming her mouth but branding the whole of her body with his touch.