What a Lady Needs

Kate could have been content with that fairy tale for all of her life, knowing she was deceiving herself, still embracing the deception. Now her world had turned upside down, and she’d been forced to grow up and face the truth. Oh, how that hurt. It hurt so much.

And it seemed every day brought a new revelation, a fresh ugliness to light. Kate couldn’t go back to her carefully constructed cocoon of wishful dreams, but she couldn’t look away from the nightmare. That the world could end up knowing every Redgrave secret was to be averted at all costs. That Simon Ravenbill already knew those secrets was humiliating past all bearing.

But there was no getting rid of him, not if Gideon approved of his presence. She’d have to face him every day until the journals were found. If she hadn’t had good reason to search for them before, she certainly had one now. Every time she looked at the marquis she would know he knew. And probably judged. Who wouldn’t be suspicious, at the least, and disdainful at the most, of any offspring of two such immoral, deadly monsters who were their parents?

She heard the sound of hoofbeats behind her and moved to the side of the riding trail.

“I’ll be mindful of the sheep!” Simon called out cheerfully as he and his mount blew by her as if Daisy were moving at a sedate trot.

“Show-off, indeed,” Kate muttered, watching him go, the stallion’s hooves kicking up great clouds of brown dust from the dirt trail, the breeze blowing it all straight back at her. She now had two choices: ride the rest of the way eating dust in Simon’s wake, or reining in the mare and only following once he was off the trail and onto the grass. She chose the latter alternative. “Daisy,” she said, brushing dust off the shoulders of her dark blue riding habit, “I do believe this means war. And as he threw down the gauntlet, it’s left to me to choose the weapons—or something like that.”

Wasn’t it strange? She felt much more in charity with Simon when he treated her as her brothers did...as his equal. But this was still war, and he had to be taught a lesson!

By the time she’d reached the mausoleum, Kate had made her choice. Valentine wanted her to practice? She’d practice. But she’d do it her way, as herself and not as some simpering debutante, and Simon would either tumble madly in love with her or go running back to London in fear for his sanity. After all, she was a Redgrave, so it could go either way. And, either way, she’d have his solemn vow to never speak a word of what he knew before she, at least figuratively, kicked him out the door.

Yes, it was the perfect plan. Hadn’t Trixie told her women always win any battle between the sexes, because they are born with more interesting weapons. Kate at last believed she truly understood what her grandmother had meant.

Simon, who had already dismounted and had been sitting on an iron bench placed outside the mausoleum, quickly rose and went to assist Kate from the saddle. But she was far ahead of him, intent on being Kate: she merely tossed him the reins, then lifted her leg to disengage from the pommel, kicked her other leg free of the stirrup and lightly leaped to the ground.

“Very neatly done,” Simon complimented her coolly. “And here I had been so hoping to help you dismount. A man lives for such opportunities, you know. My hands spanning that narrow waist, drawing you closer as I slowly lower you to the ground. A chance for an accidental brushing together of bodies...”

“And an even greater chance of suddenly finding yourself rump down in the dirt.” Kate, far from missish or easily flustered, responded without heat, already looking past him to the large stone mausoleum. She ignored completely the small tingle just then running up her spine. What a maddening man—up close like this, he even smelled good!

“A risk I’d eagerly accept.”

“Then more fool you.” He wasn’t going to stop, was he? This called for a change of subject. She kept her eyes on the mausoleum, certain if she looked at him his green eyes would be laughing. How dare he find her amusing! “But thank you for your attempt at distracting me, although it hasn’t worked. Imposing up close like this, isn’t it? And even larger than I remember from the one time I thought it might be interesting to peek inside, although the stained-glass windows prevented that.”

“All right, I’ll stop teasing you now. Yes, quite imposing, like everything else at Redgrave Manor. The pillars make for a nice touch. Do you come up here often?”

“Never.” Kate shook her head. If she visited her father’s grave, it would only remind her of her mother’s probably unmarked grave in France. But she wouldn’t tell him that. “Trixie always says the dead can keep each other company well enough. It’s not as if they’re really here, you know.” She shook her head again. “Well, Barry isn’t, that’s for certain, not unless he’s haunting the place, looking for his body. Do you believe in ghosts, and talking to the dead?”

Simon had tied Daisy’s reins to a tree branch on the opposite side of the mausoleum from his stallion, and now stood beside Kate once more as they both stared at the family tomb. “I don’t think I’ve given the subject much thought. I would like to speak to my brother, though. A lot of questions could be answered if we had the chance of hearing a voice from beyond one last time.”

Once again Kate thought about her mother. Had Maribel lingered long enough to kiss her infant daughter goodbye, or had she just run off with her French lover? She sighed and turned away. “But we might not like the answers.”

Simon put his hands on her shoulders and turned her toward him. “Look, Kate...every family has its share of scandal of one sort or another. I’m not judging, and I wish to God I didn’t need to know what I need to know. But I am here to help. Not to be overly dramatic, but lives depend on us finding those journals, that supposed bible. So, can we forget yesterday ever happened, and begin again? With you being you and me being me, and all three of us dedicated to the search.”

“I don’t know,” Kate answered, avoiding his mesmerizing green eyes, his open and honest green eyes. She felt so...drawn to him. The idea that had seemed brilliant not ten minutes earlier was now hastily discarded as she remembered swords cut both ways. Trapping him, she could end up trapping herself. Trixie had never mentioned that possibility. Her grandmother could snap her fingers and walk away from anyone except her adored grandchildren, whom she’d kill for if necessary, and without a blink. Love was a game she played well, but Kate was surprised and dismayed to realize perhaps she didn’t share Trixie’s prowess.

She took a deep breath and turned to look at him, determined to face him down. “In other words, no more outrageous comments such as the one you made about helping me dismount?” And felt her knees melt as he smiled at her, his eyes twinkling with mischief once more.

“Ask me not to breathe. It would be simpler.”

Oh, enough of this! Kate willed her knees to stiffen and then rolled her eyes at such blatant nonsense. She didn’t know if she was impressing him, but her defensive actions hadn’t done much for her still slightly wobbly knees. Compliments, sweet words, made her nervous, that’s all it was; she never knew how to respond. “So, you being you means you’re prone to spouting ridiculousness like that at the drop of a handkerchief—not that I’m dropping mine, let’s be clear about that. If so, you could stop now, because I know you don’t mean it.”

“I don’t? Are you certain of that?”

“I’m certain you’re nothing like anyone I met in London.” She rocked on the heels of her riding boots, every nerve in her body tingling with an awareness the two of them were quite alone at the top of this dratted hill and out of sight of the house. Next thing she knew, Simon would start waxing poetic about her fetching smile, or some such rot—and how would she respond to that? When one was complimented, did that make one beholden to send a compliment winging back? And where would that lead? At the rate Simon was moving, she’d soon find out what step four is! Oh, where was Valentine? What was taking him so long? It was only a stupid key.

“That’s probably because I was never meant to be the marquis.”

“What?” Kate realized her mind was wandering, perhaps even running in panicked circles.

“You said I wasn’t like any men you met in London, and I offered that this might be because I wasn’t raised to be the marquis. I happily chose a more rough and tumble life, as suited my embarrassingly plebeian nature. Or so my late father said as he happily agreed to buy me a commission and pack me off to sea. London truly does bore me. In the Royal Navy, the chain of command has a reason. In society, it’s all a bunch of self-important people deciding who should bow lower to whom because of who their father was.”

Exactly as she felt about the patronesses of Almacks. How strange. “People bow to my brother Gideon because they’d be fools not to,” Kate pointed out, not without pride. “It certainly can’t be because of who our father was. Gideon is his own man.”

“And you are very much your own woman, if you’d let yourself realize that, and not allow Val or Gideon or your grandmother or anyone else to tell you to change. The last thing you aren’t, however, is either of your parents. Or am I wrong, and the fact I’ve learned certain things about your family isn’t what’s standing between the two of us getting to know each other better?”

Kate tilted her head to one side, rhythmically tapping her small riding crop against her thigh. Too close, he was getting too close. “You know, Simon, just when I think I can begin to like you, you go and say something like that. What makes you think you can presume to peek inside my head?”

“I’m not sure. Perhaps it’s because we’re more alike, you and I, than you know. We feel...responsible.”

“And what is that supposed to mean?”

Simon looked past her, down the hill. “It means you’re not the only one who would like all of this to disappear, have never happened. Can I trust you?”

Kate could feel her heart pounding against her ribs. For the first time, she knew he was being deadly serious. “I don’t know. Should I trust you?”

“I won’t presume to answer that for you, Kate. Make up your own mind. I’ll be waiting with Henry and his hound at midnight. Some things are easier said in the dark.”

“Henry? Who told you about Hen—?”

But Simon was walking away from her, his right hand already extended to grab the bridle of Valentine’s horse. “Did you get lost along the way?”

Valentine dismounted, looking somewhat harassed. “Nothing that simple. It seems Adam got himself locked in a linen cupboard.”

Kate looked at Simon, who was a distinct distraction and puzzle, and then to the doors of the mausoleum, which were both beckoning her and repelling her, and decided, for the moment at least, she’d much rather hear about Adam.

“How did he get locked in a cupboard?” she asked, joining the men. “More important, whatever possessed you to let him out again?”

“It wasn’t an easy decision, believe me. Then again, listening to him bleat about there possibly being spiders sharing the dark with him was equally embarrassing as the reason he was in there. When nobody seemed able to locate the key, I suggested a hatchet, but Adam screamed I was trying to kill him, so we gave that up as a bad idea. As to the why of the thing, it would seem our new relative woke early today, feeling amorous, and spied out a maid bending over the fireplace grate. Needless to say, Adam needed no further invitation.”

“Oh, the poor thing,” Kate said in dismay. “Who is she?”

“I didn’t ask, but I’m told by Mrs. Justis the girl is fine. I sent her my compliments and gave her the rest of the day off. Now, let me get on with the story, which I’ll relate quickly. The nameless but brilliant maid suggested they postpone their liaison until she quickly did something Mrs. Justis asked her to do. Adam was to await her in the large linen cupboard on the third floor, as Adam’s valet was just in the other room, because, and I quote, ‘I gets noisy sometimes, you know?’ All of which he agreed to, of course, because he’s a bumble-brained idiot. She waited in the shadows until he was inside, then snuck up and locked the door before disposing of the key. She threw it from the nearest window. It took six of us to locate it.”

By now Kate was nearly bent in half, suffering a case of the giggles. She’d have to find out which of the maids was involved, and then invite her to her bedchamber so she could hear the story again, with many more of the details.

“Excuse me, Kate, for this indelicate question, but I have to know,” Simon said, “as I’m already building a picture of this in my head. Val, were his breeches on or off?”

“On,” Valentine responded, his smile lopsided, at last losing the glowering expression he’d arrived wearing. “But buttoned incorrectly. Otherwise I might have been tempted to choke him with them. That boy needs some straightening out, with no thanks to the claptrap his father fed him. I ordered him to present himself to me—properly buttoned—in Gideon’s study in one hour. If you knew what he said to me—” Again, he looked at his sister. “Never mind.”

“Don’t look at me like that, Val. I don’t need to know everything. Besides, I’m busy building my own unlikely pictures, although I’m having some trouble painting one of you being the stern voice of reason and maturity.”

Valentine looked relieved she hadn’t pressed him for more. “Don’t pin all your hopes on that eventuality, Kate. I may bring home my points by repeatedly dunking him head and shoulders into a horse trough until he either drowns or promises me he understands.”

They all laughed, but then Kate remembered the last piece of Valentine’s tale. “If you’re busy schooling Adam, does that mean we can’t continue the search until this afternoon?”