– “Yes… Not leave.”
– “I won’t leave. What is happening?”
– “Alone. Always alone.”
– “You are not alone now, Simon. My name is George. Can I help you?”
– Kelp.
– Help?
“What’s going on?” asked the wife. She and the four-legged best friend looked at me puzzled.
The sessions was over, I did not get an answer for my last question.
– “Ugh, why did you interrupt me? I finally made contact!” I grumbled.
– “With whom?” Emma asked surprised.
– “I thought, it asked for help.”
– “This is where it all starts. Haven’t you seen the movies? ‘They’ always need your help, the next thing you know – they come pouring down, all in need of something. Promise me to stop. We don’t need any more troubles. We’ve got enough on our own. Better call your son more often. Or walk the dog, if you need to relax. The dog woofed in agreement.”
I promised. Just to defuse the situation. I didn’t mean to follow up.
The next day, when Emma left, I started up the equipment again.
– “Simon, please respond. It is George. Do you hear me?”
– “Yes…”
I gasped for air,
– “Do you still need my help?”
– “Will you?” he replied.
– “What is happening to your right now?”
– “Need sweem. Waters dark. And pain. I’m afraid.”
– “Do you see the light?”
– “Do you?”
– “Its light here, I am not swimming in the dark.”
– “Yes. Not swim… “[unintelligible]
– “Do you know how to get out?”
– “Nobody… Breathe.”
– “Please, try to calm down. Calm down.”
– “Help.”
– “How?”
– “Say: ‘Hang on, Simon. Ish not for ever.’”
– “Simon,” I was too anxious, lost my breath, the tears started rolling down. Can’t even remember the last time I felt like this. “Hang on, it’s not forever!” If my words do mean something…
– “Not for… Thanks. Struggle.”
– “Fight it, Simon. Try as hard as you can. You will do it. What do you see around you?”
– “Loneli…”
– “Loneliness? You can’t see that.”
– “And you.”
– “Me?”
– “You and me. Reflect.”
The session was over and Simon did not answer. Did he drown? Where? What kind of crap is that? Why did he say “you and me” I laid down on the bed and the dog started whining, probably felt my confusion. I couldn’t for hours. Suddenly then, I remembered myself drowning. I was twelve at the time. My cousin saved me. Grabbed me from the very bottom of the lake at pulled to the surface. Felt very nauseous afterwards. Can’t stand the smell of lakewater now.
And back then… I felt that loneliness. The despair, the weakness, the indifference of the world. Simon is right I saw it too! Saw! At the bottom, looking up and feeling my consciousness slip away I saw a flickering light of the surface. My friends playing under the weak light of the sun. We were on different planes of reality and I felt pain and cold. I need to say something encouraging to him. To give him the strength to fight! I jump up and go back to the computer. No voices. Just some static and vibrations. The EVP enthusiasts call them “nulls” – you can’t usually hear anything intelligible in these recordings. What did he mean by “reflect”? Is it just another word that got corrupted? And “you and me”. What do we have in common? I came up to the mirror and save a gloomy looking fellow with bags under the eyes and drooping mouth. Yeah, sure. “Reflect”. I’d certainly love not to.
The next night I waited to speak with Simon tête-à-tête. But it all began even stranger than before. Firstly, I got a response from “Sanjita” station, even though I explicitly asked for Simon. They said they’d try to make contact and I should “talk to myself”, so that the connection would be better. What did they mean by “to myself”? What should I ask? Then Simon responded,
– “I’m still here. We should bi…”
– “Be what?” I asked.
– “Bid far…”
– “Farewell? No, let’s go up first, then say our goodbyes. Believe in yourself and move forward. There’s no weight where you swim. You are full of energy. You must… see the light.”
Where did the “energy” and the “light” come from? Astounding! The feeling of guilt and pain started growing in me. It appeared suddenly and enveloped me, I felt as if I let somebody down.
– “I’m sorry…” I exhaled loudly.
– “I see!”
– “See? What do you see?”