Lust, Loathing And A Little Lip Gloss

“My sister helped me put this together.”

“Leah,” Jason said and I saw the spark of memory twinkle in his eyes. He had never met Leah, but had heard about her from both me and Dena. More to the point, he had heard tales of her devious offspring.

I closed the door and led them to the food and wine. Before I had even finished pouring the first glass the doorbell rang again. I excused myself and went to welcome my next visitor. This time it was Venus, Scott and Kane. Venus was boldly ignoring the weather by going coatless in a knee-length pencil skirt and an asymmetrical sleeveless top made of a material that resembled crinkly paper. Her hair was pulled into the same low ponytail she had worn on our first meeting. Kane was less adventurous in chinos and a wool sweater that had the look of being handmade. Scott looked like Scott—well dressed, hair purposely and attractively disheveled, an impish smile. Later I would notice that he only aimed his smile in my direction when Venus had her back to him.

It was Venus who said hello first as she stepped inside, letting her massive presence ooze into every corner of my home until the room was so full of her that I wondered if there would be enough space for the rest of us. She raised her arms, her fingertips touching like a ballerina preparing to dance. She then gracefully spread her arms wide, inhaling deeply. But that’s where the dance ended. She coughed and brought her hands to her flat chest. “This is all wrong.”

“What’s wrong?” Kane asked anxiously. But Scott didn’t seem perturbed by her announcement at all. If anything he looked bored.

“The arrangement of the furniture,” she explained. “The feng shui—it’s not right.”

“My mother never decorated in accordance to feng shui,” Kane snapped. “And she still felt the spirits.”

“But she didn’t see them,” Venus said evenly. “She didn’t know how to direct the energy of the house.”

“There were reasons why the spirits couldn’t come to my mother.” Kane stepped in front of Venus, invading her personal space. “But those reasons had nothing to do with interior decorating. Feng shui means nothing to those in the world beyond.”

A light laugh escaped her lips. “Kane,” she said, cupping his chin with her workmanlike hand. “You are not an expert in these matters. You can barely summon your own dog, let alone a ghost.”

Kane didn’t move and for a second I thought that Venus might be in danger. I shot a questioning look at Scott. He no longer looked bored, but neither did he seem to have any intention of intervening.

But then Kane stepped back, just out of her reach. They continued to stare at one another, not speaking. From the dining room I could hear Amelia’s cheerful chatter, and then she rushed into the room, her eyes dancing with a vivacious energy that seemed incongruous with the mood of the other guests. “Hello!” Her salutation echoed in the silent room. Then she went around to each of the three new arrivals and gave Kane and Scott the same hug and kiss she had given me. Kane tolerated this with what appeared to be strained patience, but Scott clearly enjoyed the close female contact and their hug lasted a half a minute too long. It was Amelia who broke away first. She then smiled nervously at Venus. “Did you get a load of that séance table?” she asked, her joviality suddenly seeming a little forced. “Those candles are beeswax, Venus. I haven’t seen anything this fancy since the last time you hosted an event.”

“You weren’t at the last event I hosted,” Venus said.

“No, but I was at the one before that.” She then turned toward the male guests. “Come to the dining room. Enrico outdid himself this time.” She paused right before disappearing back into the dining room and tilted her head in my direction. “Where is Enrico anyway? Did he go out for the perfect wine or something?”

I winced. I hadn’t yet told them that while the food was from Enrico’s restaurant it wasn’t actually made by Enrico. I wasn’t entirely clear on where I stood with Kane, but I was pretty sure that I was on Venus’s shit list. If she found out that Enrico and I had exchanged words she would blame me for his absence, even if I was the one in the right.

But before I could figure out how to address the situation the doorbell rang again. I sent up a quick silent prayer that it was Enrico, but to my disappointment it was a family of three. The man introduced himself as Al and the woman and Goth teenage boy as his wife, Lorna, and son, Zach. Three more names from my place cards.

They were a family, but as far as I could tell the only thing that unified them was proximity. The man was a clean-cut blonde with thinning hair. He wore a polo shirt and chinos and he appeared more resigned than happy to be there. His son was a whole other story. His hair, his clothes, his nails, all colored black. Even his eyes were outlined with a harsh black eyeliner, made all the more dramatic by his white powdered face. Around his neck he wore a velvet ribbon choker, and I was tempted to reach out and see if its unraveling would result in decapitation.

But it was the woman who interested me. Like her husband, she wore chinos and her cotton shirt was a pale pink. Her hair was a graying brown and cut neatly in a style that you would expect to see on the stereotypical suburban homemaker. Totally normal, yet, on her, the outfit, the haircut, even the mild-mannered smile, it all seemed like a costume: her hair too thick for such a neat cut where it should have been long and unruly, her skin too olive for the light-colored clothing, the determination in her eyes too strong to gel with the timid pink of her lip gloss.

But I didn’t say any of that. Instead I just ushered them in and closed the door behind them. Jason reentered the living room, a glass of red wine in his hand. “Looks like almost everybody’s here,” he said. “As soon as Enrico shows up we’ll have ten.”

This was the time to tell them. Venus already suspected something was amiss. I could tell by the way she was looking at me, her stare hinting at an underlying hostility.

I cleared my throat and went to the place card that bore Enrico’s name, fondling it like it had some kind of voodoo power that could call him forth. But of course that didn’t work. “I don’t think Enrico is coming,” I finally said.

“Not coming?” Scott asked. “But hasn’t he already been here? Isn’t he the one who brought the food?”

“Um, no. I ordered the food from his restaurant. See, I talked to him earlier today and he seemed a little…out of sorts.”

“How so?” Venus lowered herself onto my armchair with practiced casualness.

“He said he was, um, haunted.”

“Haunted!” Kane was immediately by my side, encasing both my hands in his. “Did he see something? Was he visited?”

“I…I don’t know. He just said he was haunted and that things were not so good.”

“Whoa, okay, this is really heavy,” Amelia said, taking a moment to examine each of our faces to make sure we all shared her sentiment. “Maybe he summoned something and he can’t make it go away. Maybe we should take this party to him and see if we can be of help.”

There was a chorus of protests although Kane and Scott both remained silent.

“I know Enrico better than the rest of you,” Venus said, her eyes still on me. “If he wanted us in his home he would have told us to come.”

“But maybe he didn’t think we’d accept the invitation,” Kane offered. “After all, he must know that some of us blame him for Maria’s departure from the group.”

“I didn’t say he would have invited us,” Venus said evenly. “I said he would have told us to come. There is a very big difference. Enrico may or may not have been aware of your feelings, Kane, and they are your feelings, but whether he was aware of them or not he would have still expected us to yield to his celebrity.”

“He’s a chef!” Amelia said with a laugh. “Not a movie star.”

“I think people in San Francisco like chefs more than movie stars. They’re more real,” Zach said. It was the first thing I’d heard him say and his voice sounded too young and innocent for his somber attire. I tried to get a sense of his age. It was hard to gauge considering all the white powder covering his face, but my guess was that he was around fifteen.

“Maybe we should just give him some space,” Lorna said softly. “Of course, there’s still the problem of our number. Someone will have to leave.”

Lorna leaned over and put a hand on Al’s knee. “I know you don’t really want to be here, darling. Why don’t you go get a beer at that pub you used to go to? The one around the corner. What’s its name again?”

“Jax, but I’m not going anywhere,” Al said shortly.

“But I just thought…”

“I know what you thought, but you were wrong,” he snapped. “Now is someone else going to leave or are we going to call this damn thing off?”

Lorna seemed to shrink into herself and Zach scowled at his father.

“I guess I could—” Amelia began, but she was interrupted by the doorbell. “Maybe it’s Enrico!” she exclaimed and rushed to see.

When she opened the door she revealed a woman dressed head to toe in Calvin Klein with her hair cut in a severe, short style. She peeled off her overcoat and threw it into Amelia’s unexpecting arms. “Tell Enrico I’m here.”

“Maria,” Kane said in a soft voice.

She blinked at the sound of her name and grabbed onto the door frame as if she expected someone to try to push her out. “Whatever you’re going to say about numerology or whatnot just…just save it,” she said. “I’m giving him our condo, our house in Tuscany, I’m even giving him the damned parrot, but I’ll be damned if I’m going to give him my friends.” She glared at the occupants of the room. “You’re supposed to be my friends! I’m the true believer, not that fat, self-important, fettuccini-eating snob! How could you not invite me to this?”

“Some of us wanted to,” Kane whispered, then sent a scathing look at Venus who stared blankly back.

“Enrico’s a no-show, Maria,” Amelia said, struggling to give her a welcoming hug while holding her coat. “He’s being haunted.”

“Is that what he told you?” Maria said with a bitter laugh. “The only thing haunting that man is the last review he got from Michael Bauer. Did you read it? Three and a half stars. Not four, three and a half. That’s why he’s not here. The bastard is sulking, probably teaching that bird how to destroy a newspaper clipping.”

“That shouldn’t take a lot of training,” Scott said, somewhat bemused.

“I see that the table is all set up,” Maria noted. “Can we start this then? Or are you afraid I’ll taint the proceedings with my bitterness?”

“Nothing wrong with bitterness,” Scott said. “Just look what it does for chocolate, right, Soapy?” As soon as he said it you could see the regret spread across his features. It was as blatant as Venus’s scowl.