It Began with a Crush

“We’re talking about it now, and it’s decided.”

“Well, no, because it’s possible you have some bargaining power,” he said. “There might be something from you that I want, that I would be more than happy to exchange for the deductible on the insurance.”

Was he talking about—

“I mean,” he went on very quickly, “the pony camp thing.”

So, no. He wasn’t talking about her selling him her body. Just to be clear.

What is wrong with you, Mary Jane?

As if she didn’t already know.

“You gave me the impression that pony camp would be a special deal with the owner, is what I’m saying,” Joe explained. “So if you can help me organize that, put in a word, or arrange a meeting, or whatever it takes, then it’ll hugely help with the girls this summer, and you certainly won’t owe me for the car thing.”

“I’ll call Penelope tomorrow, and talk to the Richardsons about it, too.” She’d told Joe about them, and their kids and nanny.

“And call me as soon as you know if we can work something out?”

“Of course.”

“I’m sorry, I’m nagging you about this as much as the girls would, but at the moment Dad and I are running the garage and looking after the girls between us, and I can already see that it’s going to be too much for Dad.”

“Of course. They’re adorable, but full of energy.” It sounded inadequate. All she really knew about kids came from the ones who stayed at Spruce Bay. Some of those could be pretty obnoxious, and it was a testament to the yearning in her heart that she still wanted babies, lots of babies, even when she’d seen that they didn’t always stay cute for long.

Joe’s girls were definitely cute. What was this really about in her heart? The man or the girls? If they had a mother... If she was only away for a few days, and it was only by chance that she hadn’t come up in conversation...

Maybe this man and his family were completely out of bounds, and even if they weren’t...

I’m scaring myself, feeling like this so fast.

“He’ll be stubborn about it if I just try to send them off to some kind of commercial day care,” Joe was saying. “He doesn’t think that’s good enough. But a pony camp would be their dream come true, and after—” He stopped and muttered something under his breath. “You don’t need the detail.”

“No, it’s fine.” She would take all the detail he wanted to give her. She would listen with all her heart.

Not good. Very, very bad.

She waited to see if he would say more, and when he didn’t, her disappointment was yet another danger signal on a rapidly lengthening list. She wanted to know everything about him, and she wanted to hear it from him, in his dark, husk-and-syrup voice, and that was scary.

Crushy. Desperate. Something to beat herself up over, not to embrace.

They emerged from the tree-lined Spruce Bay entrance drive and reached the parking area in front of the office, where he halted, leaving the engine idling. “Thank you so much for everything today,” she told him, deliberately formal. “For the car, and coming to pick me up, and then dinner. If I can arrange the pony thing, it still won’t be nearly enough.”

“Fuggedaboutit,” he said, like a character in a mafia movie, and not for the first time she found herself wondering why he’d never succeeded as an actor, the way he’d once been so sure he would. He had the looks, the voice and more charisma than any woman could possibly want.

“I’ll call you about the pony thing as soon as I have some information,” she said.

“Great.”

“Right. Bye, then.”

She was so determined not to linger in the car that she scrambled out of it with embarrassing haste, and he drove off at once, with just one final wave. After he’d disappeared back into the trees, she stood there for too long, feeling dreamy and unsettled and full of longing and absolutely, completely furious with herself.

The furious part was pretty familiar, and she knew how to handle it. When your thoughts kept steering onto a track that you didn’t want, you just had to keep busy enough that they went away purely through being crowded out of existence.

She bustled through the office door and found Nickie fiddling with her manicure and talking on her phone, slouched back in the swivel chair with her knees drawn up and bumping the desk. “She wants to? Are you serious?” she was saying in teenager shriek.

So, not talking to a guest, then.

When she saw Mary Jane, she quickly ended the call and smartened up her body language, as if she thought she was about to get yelled at. It was almost more annoying than if she’d kept on talking to her friend, because it gave the impression that she considered Mary Jane to be a dragon of a boss.

“Busy?” Mary Jane asked lightly.

“Cabin 12 flooded their bathroom, and Room 4 couldn’t get their air-conditioning to turn on.”

“That’s probably because the air-conditioning couldn’t work out if it was supposed to be blowing hot air or cold,” Mary Jane drawled. The new reverse-cycle appliances installed during the re-fit could do both. Even though it was a little chilly out now, the cabins had been warmed by the sun most of the day. They should have been cozy but not too hot, and certainly not too cold.

“I know, right?” Nickie rolled her eyes and smiled, and Mary Jane didn’t feel like such a dragon anymore. “I actually had to ask them what they wanted it for, heating or cooling, because the room felt like the perfect temperature to me.”

“So you got it going?”

“We set it at seventy-five degrees and it decided to do some heating. When we get some real summer, they’ll probably want it set at sixty-two. Do you want me to clock off now?”

“Just stay for another five minutes while I run over to the restaurant and see how they’re doing over there. But unless there’s been a disaster you should be fine to go after that.”

“Thanks.” She smiled and looked at the time on her phone. “What time tomorrow?”

“Let’s say noon?”

The office phone rang at that moment and Nickie picked it up. “Spruce Bay Resort. This is Nickie speaking. How may I help you?”

Mary Jane went over to check in with Daisy, but service was winding down over there, and everything had gone smoothly. Daisy insisted she wasn’t required. With a team of staff who knew what they were doing, by this time, the restaurant ran almost independent of the rest of the resort. “Take a break, Mary Jane.”

“How about you?” Mary Jane suggested. “Don’t you want to get home to your husband? Put your feet up?”

Daisy dragged some steam-misted blond hair away from her pink cheeks. “I’m good. I’ll be out of here in half an hour.”

“Don’t know where you get your energy.”

Daisy grinned. “I’m told I should enjoy it while it lasts, because once the third trimester kicks in I’ll never ever have it again in my whole entire life.”

“Ooh, who have you been talking to?”

“A very wise woman in the waiting room at the doctor, who’s pregnant with number five.”

“Wow.” Mary Jane ignored the stupid pang of envy and regret that kicked at her stomach the way Daisy’s unborn baby would soon start kicking at hers.

That was going to be me. Expert mom; big, beautiful family; devoted and thoughtful parenting.